In no way shape or form was I trying to imply that you were looking for advice. I just thought I would drop that in there in case someone else was lol.

Sounds like your buddy was being himself, or at least his drinking self. 

Best: Hi, my name is xy, I think you look interesting. Would you mind talking for a bit?

The very best: Does this rag smell like chloroform? [Works every time.]

His drunk self, yes. What made it so hilarious was because the guy normally wasn't like that. Out of all our friends, he was the Casanova of the bunch; always saying the perfect thing at the perfect time; always getting the girl etc. But the first time he gets drunk... lol

I once watched a drunk white dude in my neighborhood, circa 1996, try to pick up a chick with "yo, yo, yo shawty. You look dope, yo." She (and all the rest of us) laughed in his face. He was wasted drunk, so i dunno if he processed the embarrassment in the moment. But, we all talked about it for years, and he sure was embarrassed after the fact. Didn't often show his face after that.

"I think my penis stopped breathing. Do you know CPR?"

I just always send girls a picture of my big and amazing.....
...game collection.

It never works thou,never.

Caveats:

1)  It helps if she is already attracted to you.
2)  If #1 is true, then girls like it when you tease them playfully.  It increases attraction.

Having said that, when I was in college I had a girl with the school paper asking for pickup lines, and she really liked this one.  (We'll call her Jessica, because I forgot her name.)

Me:  "What's your name?"
Her:  "Jessica."
Me:  "Really?  Because you look like an Angel to me."

"My penis died, can I bury it in your ass?"

LMAO

@OP

Nice shoes, wanna fuck?