Well, I was VERY young when this happened, so the following comes from what I've been told rather than proper memory. So here it goes:

You know how babies usually just sit inside their mothers for about nine months before being born? Well, not me! I was an energetic little fetus, always kicking about, twisting and turning. At one point, I even did a backflip! This as it turned out, was a Very Bad Thing. You see, babies are supposed to pop out of the mother head-first, not feet-first. So I needed a C-Section. That's right, I was fucking things up from before the word go!

Anyway, after I was taken out, the doctors noticed something disconcerting. Essentially, when I did my little backflip, I had gotten my umbilical cord twisted around my scrotum. Essentially, I strangled a chunk of my body to death with the cord. By the time it was out, the entire thing was dead. So at this point, the doctors had two choices: remove the contaminated tissue, or let me die. Guess what they chose?

And so, at the ripe old age of about 50 hours old, I got my testicles surgically removed. And so far as I was concerned, that was the end of that.

Anyway, this little episode had its consequences, as I'm sure you'd imagine. Hormone therapy, aka shots of testosterone in the ass, started at the age of two, I discovered that other boys had these weird things below their penises when I was a few years older and was taking a bath with my little brother, I had a wave of depression when I learned that I could never be a parent around age 11, and got implants to make myself feel better at age 13.

And that, in more words than it deserves, is the story about how I have no ballz.

Well, I was VERY young when this happened, so the following comes from what I've been told rather than proper memory. So here it goes:

You know how babies usually just sit inside their mothers for about nine months before being born? Well, not me! I was an energetic little fetus, always kicking about, twisting and turning. At one point, I even did a backflip! This as it turned out, was a Very Bad Thing. You see, babies are supposed to pop out of the mother head-first, not feet-first. So I needed a C-Section. That's right, I was fucking things up from before the word go!

Anyway, after I was taken out, the doctors noticed something disconcerting. Essentially, when I did my little backflip, I had gotten my umbilical cord twisted around my scrotum. Essentially, I strangled a chunk of my body to death with the cord. By the time it was out, the entire thing was dead. So at this point, the doctors had two choices: remove the contaminated tissue, or let me die. Guess what they chose?

And so, at the ripe old age of about 50 hours old, I got my testicles surgically removed. And so far as I was concerned, that was the end of that.

Anyway, this little episode had its consequences, as I'm sure you'd imagine. Hormone therapy, aka shots of testosterone in the ass, started at the age of two, I discovered that other boys had these weird things below their penises when I was a few years older and was taking a bath with my little brother, I had a wave of depression when I learned that I could never be a parent around age 11, and got implants to make myself feel better at age 13.

And that, in more words than it deserves, is the story about how I have no ballz.

It takes balls to share that story though

Well... I sincerely feel bad for you. :o

It must be very hard to not have balls. Sorries.