no, i just went to the gym with my friends and then i got drun and high with some other friensssds

My sisters make me look like a loser with their careers. Plus, I just got laid off. I suppose it could be worse.

Interesting. Could you elaborate on that a bit? Are you bad at picking up verbal cues too, because those are important too in how to build a conversation.

About controlled environment, yeah but what if you joined one of those groups where non-social people gather and practice socializing and talking?

Kind of. No *real* job, stuck at home because of that, lacking in irl social contact because of that. No disposable income means i need to save for the handful of videogames i *need* to get, and keeps me stuck perpetually, until i get that first breakthrough towards working.

Yep, I have a tendency to take people literally under pressure (and I am under French-oral-exam levels of pressure in a conversation even if I know the person). I take any negative emotion displayed as a sign they never want to talk to me again, then I literally run away and am thinking about the mistake I made (or thought I made) for the rest of the day.

I have tried those groups but they are full of people who are either i) genuinely retarded, ii) have no idea how to behave in a social setting e.g. shouting, aggressively talking about their special interests or making repetitive sounds, or iii) have other conditions like ADHD, Tourette's, autism and so on. I am capable of appearing normal it just takes 100 times the effort to do so.

Or else it's a rote learning of social cues from a textbook. I /know/ Person A should say "Hello" and Person B should ask about the weather or what happened to them at the weekend, and so on.

No, because I'm still alive. Technically, I'm winning

I have the same problem, but have been practicing. Vgchartz and cyber socializing helped me.

Figure this, that I was unable to socialize neither online nor IRL just 3 years ago.

Sounds like you have a bit of Aspergers in you, don't you think? I think I have some of that myself. I am good at picking up clues in convos, especially at reading all non-verbal signs, but something is definitely wrong in my brain because in normal chit-chat/small talk, especially with strangers but with friends and relatives too, I'm seldom able to come up with something smooth or clever to say quickly enough.  I come up with something decent to say when it's already too late and the subject changed andthen it would be awkward to say what finally popped up in my mind. This is especially hard when it comes to humor which is a huge part of socializing. I can almost never tell a joke or something really funny or witty. And it mentally exhausts me a lot to do this kind of small talk. So I am often forced to play the role of the silent guy in many convos. It sucks.

"Genuinely retarded", hahaha. Yeah, I was afraid those groups wouldn't work.

Yeah, underconfidence is one part of it, but for me it's also something else. My brain is just very slow for doing small talk.

I know intellectually and socially what would be a proper thing to say and I easily can read and sense the aura and feelings of the other person(s), but I just can't come up with clever ideas of what to say fast enough. To normal people those words come out pretty much automatically.