Are you a Loser and Why?

[Slimebeast]

Soleron said:

Slimebeast said:

...

Sounds like you have a bit of Aspergers in you, don't you think?

I have a diagnosis, yes. My university uses it to rip off the government by a few thousand pounds to no benefit (mentoring I don't use, lab support that doesn't help, extra time in exams I refused, etc).

I think I have some of that myself.I am good at picking up clues in convos, especially at reading all non-verbal signs,but something is definitely wrong in my brain because in normal chit-chat/small talk, especially with strangers but with friends and relatives too, I'm seldom able to come up with something smooth or clever to say quickly enough.  I come up with something decent to say when it's already too late and the subject changed and it would be awkward to say what finally popped up in my mind. And it mentally exhausts me a lot to do this kind of small talk. So I am often forced to play the role of the silent guy in many convos. It sucks.

I think everyone is underconfident socially, even the outgoing people, they just do a better job of hiding it.

Yeah, underconfidence is one part of it, but for me it's also something else. My brain is just very slow for doing small talk.

I know intellectually and socially what would be a proper thing to say and I easily can read and sense the aura and feelings of the other person(s), but I just can't come up with clever ideas of what to say fast enough. To normal people those words come out pretty much automatically.