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Forums - General Discussion - Is ending a relationship through text a good idea?

It is a great idea to end a relationship via text. We are in the 21st century and we spend up to 12 hours staring at our smart phones every day. Modern technology has made life very easy and convenient to do what we want!



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danasider said:
No offense, but it sounds like you're the problem in the relationship. She's dealt with your problem with drugs, depression, you not wanting to do things, and you not caring about your health. She's even decided to attend the same school as you, because people know one of the biggest things to end a relationship is distance. She's a committed chick. And then there's the situation of asking if you should break up with someone over a text, especially despite all she's dealt with, when that's pretty common knowledge you shouldn't do that. Heck, the only reason you are asking about it on a forum, is because deep down you know it's shitty.

You know what, yeah, end it through a text, email, sign language. End it through morse code if you have to. The young heartbreak she'll experience in the near future is nothing compared to the turmoil she'll put her life through and the opportunities she'll have lost by staying with someone as self absorbed and callous as you.
Nighthawk117 said: 
jason1637 said: 
Appreciate the advice from the thread. I got a chance to talk to her today and she was a bit annoyed but was understanding and she said she'd stop pushing me to do things I don't want to do so I decided not to end the relationship.

She seems to me to be that clingy/bossy kind of girlfriend.  Not good.  In some respects, they can be the worst.  Imagine if you married her.

She would just get more bossy/clingy.  Can she handle a few days without texting/calling you?  Does she bother you if your out with your guy friends?

Jason, be careful with this girl.  She may be more trouble than she's worth.  You owe her nothing.

Well that is two extremes of the spectrum lol.



 

 

Cobretti2 said:

Well that is two extremes of the spectrum lol.

Seems like an extreme response on my part (and I see that it is the opposite extreme of the other response you quoted), but it is a fair one.

I've never been dumped through text, but I have been in my fair share of toxic relationships with partners who are selfish and soul sucking. The whole one sided thing where the person takes and takes, but it's never good enough. I've learned to avoid these types. Everything the OP said put him in this category, and everything I mentioned was taken from his responses. I was just putting it out there, because so many are so supportive just because he's part of the community, yet sometimes someone needs a person to be real and say "hey, get your head out of your *cough*, you *beep*ing up a good thing, dude."

Reminds me of an article I read recently about an Irish person visiting the US and sharing his opinion on the state of our touchiness. How people aren't allowed to criticize or tell people the truth when they ask for it, because our society overvalues PC culture to the point that people's reactions to each other have to be fake for the sole reason of keeping up appearances ("How are you doing?", "Awesome" [person is actually having a shitty day]). When I say PC culture, I don't think people should be hurling the n-word or bullying others online, but if you ask for an answer, I think giving an honest one is fair even if what you hear doesn't make you feel good.

Looks like the OP talked it out with his girlfriend after enough people let him that breaking up through text is a dick move, so that's good news.



Most relationships start via text these days.
Why not end it the same way it started?

I mean, it's not the best way to start/end things and you should avoid it if possible, but sometimes it's the better approach if the situation would turn extremely toxic.



--::{PC Gaming Master Race}::--

Ex did that to me very unexpected and after 5 years of being together,never got closure and got me and relationships afterwards fucked up for years.



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So, OP, how did you end up handling this?



Immersiveunreality said:
Ex did that to me very unexpected and after 5 years of being together,never got closure and got me and relationships afterwards fucked up for years.

The person didn’t want to be with you and ended it.  What more did you need?  You are probably just messed up because 5 years is a long time, and also because you are allowing yourself to be messed up.



TheLastStarFighter said:
Immersiveunreality said:
Ex did that to me very unexpected and after 5 years of being together,never got closure and got me and relationships afterwards fucked up for years.

The person didn’t want to be with you and ended it.  What more did you need?  You are probably just messed up because 5 years is a long time, and also because you are allowing yourself to be messed up.

Its kind off a personal thing and more context is needed for each individual to know the full extent of the impact.

And offcourse i was not strong enough mentally to withstand not getting messed up but is it worth the risk of messing someone up to just make it easy for yourself ending a relationship or should we out of respect make it a tiny bit harder for ourselves and give each other closure?



If it’s a toxic relationship that requires you to cut them out completely and start ‘no contact’ immediately, then yes.

Otherwise man up.



Sounds like the cowards way out. Be a man about it and tell her face to face. Ultimately it’s your decision, but ending it with a text just seems cowardly and immature. But I’m 36. OP might be a kid still for all I know