It's not stupid at all, it makes perfect sense. Those that don't like the company will use it as an excuse to bash them, as usual, but the practice itself makes complete sense.
Maybe in 2010 (just picking a random year here) it made perfect sense, but as of lately it hasn't been a very acceptable practice, and if gamers voice their opinions, they can help change the industry (such was the case with loot boxes).
But to be fair, Sony is taking an unfair amount of backlash over this, as I have heard that the same goes for gamers who play Fortnite on Switch first and then subsequently try to play it on PS4 afterwards. If that's true then both companies have got issues.
From what I understand, you get the same issue whether going from PS to Xbox, PS to Switch, Switch to PS or Xbox to PS.
But to blame all three companies is not right. The message and not allowing you to do so is something that would have been implemented by Epic due to Sony not allowing crossplay. The way Epic designed the system is that as soon as your account logs into ANY console, it gets locked into that Crossplay ecosystem. There are two crossplay ecosystems (PS, PC, Mobile) (Xbox, Ninty, PC, Mobile)
Nintendo and Microsoft are both open to the idea of all systems crossplay and want it so. Sony is not. Thus Epic set up this system as it is. Nintendo and Microsoft have nothing to do with the system. It is Epics system, which is set up as it is due to Sony's lack of cooperation.