I finally realized how naive I've been. American Dad is such a funny show. Funnier than Family Guy. Roger is ridiculous.

Exam tomorrow o____0 got 75% in the coursework, so if I do okay in this I can still get my first... but damn, why can't I study?! D:
and 9gag isn't helping. argh :(

I guess my life is too easy, being a townie and all (and, just to be clear, I'm neither talking about nor playing Mafia). No exams for me, as I had decided that I was done with school years ago when I secured my GED.

I've done some preeetty stupid stuff and messed up A LOT, we all have. Sometimes I think like that, but honestly no one pays attention/cares about stuff like that, only you fixate over it. People don't care and you shouldn't either

Me: Before, After

I know those are memes but they accurately describe the situation. I'm a lot more carefree/less anxious than before = much happier :)

OT: I have a huge project to do... Need a break from all this uni stuff!!

Somewhere deep down you still think people care about what you do, they reeeeally don't + You care a great deal about what people think = All that anxiety

@posting: Who cares if they're good enough, I post tons of crap lol, even though I like to maintain a high standard in most of the things I do I still do lots of random stuff, I used to care about what people thought of me but not any more. I know this is easier said than done, heck I know I'm not 100% like that either, but seriously, random people aren't worth it

@library story: I honestly wouldn't mind if that happened, either you both lol about it and you get to know a new person, or you have a funny story to tell your friends lol

Long story short, you shouldn't care about what other people think cuz you'd be surprised how little of it they actually do

@ trasharmdsister12: Even the smartest of us do dumb things from time to time, for instance, I misinterpreted FOSTERTHEPEOPLE's "Pumped-out Kicks", thinking it was about masturbation instead of gun violence in school, which actually is what the song is about. This revelation led me to the conclusion that there should be less songs about gun violence and more songs about masturbation.

OT: My paternal grandmother is going to go into surgery this morning in order to remove cancerous growths on her kidney. They are likely to remove part or all of her kidney. Assuming that she doesn't die from complications of cancer or the surgery to remove it, she will likely spend the rest of her existence on this plane on dialysis. Just seeing these words on the screen, and knowing that I was the one who typed them, is enough to haunt my very soul. What do I do if she dies? Should I attend her funeral? If I attend her funeral, am I required to cry, medicated as I am? Would she want to speak to me upon her deathbed? If I meet her on her deathbed, what the flying fuck am I going to say? Whatever happens, how am I going to avoid making a jackass of myself? All these questions and more weigh heavily on my psyche as I plow on through these coming days. Please pray for my Nana's well-being, I know I will.

So before my Reformation Texts Final today the professor says: "If anyone has to use the bathroom, I suggest they go now, its a long test."

And I go: "Pfft, not me"

An hour into the test and my bladder was on the verge of exploding but I was too embarrassed because of her announcement to actually go to the bathroom. So I basically breezed through the last half of the text while squirming in my seat like a maniac. As soon as I finished i ran to the nearest bathroom and took one of the most satisfying pisses of my life.

Off-topic: It's kinda weird seeing Chris Arnone's face staring at me from the side of the page while I'm typing. Stop staring at me!

trasharmdsister12 said: 7 years ago today I told her that I had feelings for her. She laughed and said "No, seriously... who is it?". I told her again. She didn't believe me again. I looked at her. Her expression dropped. I walked away. And then it was off to Christmas holidays for 3 weeks with my thoughts. Here I am 7 years later and I'm in a similar position. She's half way around the world and I'm about to further the distance with my holiday travels. We both know it's not going to work out but we've tried not to worry about it. I have no job. I'm struggling with money. I've forgotten most of what I picked up from my university education. I have no will to better myself academically or physically. And all I can do is laugh at how much I've been loathing myself all these years. How much I've set myself back. And the funniest thing of all is I finally have that passion again. Maybe I've been holding myself back from feeling it again until today. Maybe not. Whatever it is, I feel like letting loose and really putting my nose to the grindstone again. I feel a sense of thirst for more and I want to make it all happen. With that, I wish you all the happiest of holidays and I look forward to "seeing" you all in the new year. All the best to all of you!

I truly hope that everything works out for you,you deserve it,since you're a great guy from my knowledge so far.No one is perfect,I'm sure that you will overcome all these obstacles that are thrown by life at you.

Wish you all the best!

Semester over, Party is on.