"Answer: Oh, master, I could not allow myself to harm another. What if they have families? Or children? We must always think of the children. The littlest ones always suffer in war."

"That was a close one - I almost surrendered completely to peace and pacifism - how repugnant. Conclusion: Still there was a brief moment where I felt like I almost understood why some meatbags choose peace and friendship over a high-powered blaster carbine. Query: Now, are there any other horrors you wish to try and insert in my system, or is your electronic butchery done?"

HK-47 Protocol Pacifist Package, there's nothing better :D

I am rubber you are glue.

MURRAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

"Jill, why don't you, the master of unlocking, take this lock pick."

From Gears of war 2:

""Your world can end in the blink of an eye. One event, one unexpected twist of fate and suddenly the world as you knew it is gone forever. All that you held dear, all that you held close... is washed away in a sea of distant memory. Life is cruel. Of this I have no doubt. But life continues on... with, or without you. One can only hope that one leaves behind a lasting legacy. But so often, the legacies we leave behind... are not the one we intended."

It's time to kick ass and chew bubble gum. And I'm all out of gum.

By far the funniest character in any game I've ever played. I'll list a few quotes

"Aw, did the little Desert Princess have her britches in a bunch because the sultan wanted another son? Tell me, do you spend most of your nights drunken and belligerent, followed about by a handful of leering sycophants, looking in your own pathetic way to justify your existence to a disapproving father?"

"Women were the reason I became a monk - and, ah, the reason I switched back... "

M: "Hey Nxxxx, knock-knock.
Nxxxx: "Why do you persist in addressing me as a door?"
M: "It's a joke, you stupid polygon! You're supposed to answer "Who's there?""
Nxxxx: "I know who is there. It is you. Why would I ask a question when I already know the answer?"
M: "Just forget it."

"I am both happy and miserable, without the happy part!"

"This place is locked up tighter than a chastity belt!"

"That beauty sleep didn't help much."

I edited some of them to take out names, but I'll give a gold star sticker to whoever can guess the character.

These are just a small portion of the great lines in this game.

 Planescape? Morte?

That game has so many great lines, and I laugh pretty much every time Morte talks.

"Like the moon over
the day, my genius and brawn
are lost on these fools"
~Bowser (Mario RPG)
COME ON, its Bowser saying a haiku!