Happy to say the Switch OLED is sitting on shelves at our local Bestbuy. Not many interested in it. Gamers don't want to spend over $500 CAD for low end mobile hardware? Without a controller? Shocking, I know. Meanwhile if we could only get more PS5s and XBOXs in stock. Maybe they could start by lowering the price in Canada, where the Switch is truly shockingly expensive.
Since you need a controller and the Switch doesn't come with one (and no, the joycons don't count), it is actually cheaper to buy a PS5 than a Switch.
The RRP of the OLED switch is $450 in Canada.
The RRP of the PS5 is $629.99 ($499.99 for digital).
And you might hate the joycons but plenty of people have no issue using them for tv gaming. I think they're fine used detached. I don't use the grip thingie though I think that's trash.
low-end hardware you can make a case for but the rest of your post is... yikes.