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Forums - General Discussion - Any other options in life?

DarthMetalliCube said:

I feel like (or at least in the past) I'm in the same boat at times my dude, you are not alone. The best thing I can say is to just hang in there, as you just never know what can transpire in life, and hanging around to find out what sorts of adventures and unanticipated opportunities await is a lot more fun and exciting than just quitting and knowing for sure where and how it ends. Even if things don't quite go as planned, you don't know until you try.

Find something, anything, that makes you happy and motivated, and strive for that. Work on both physical and mental fitness, eat healthy, these sorts of things can make for a happier, stronger, and more healthy mind. You don't have to see the whole picture right now, and frankly you shouldn't b/c that would be overwhelming. Just go one step at a time and one thing will lead to another. If nothing else, keep fighting for your loved ones, and maybe down the line you'll find it rewarding to fight for yourself too.

I assume you're a gamer being on this site, so I'd recommend checking out this vid as it looks at facing the hardships of life from a gamer's perspective. I quite like the quote "maybe god/fate/whatever put your life on hard mode, (or at least it feels that way sometimes). Well beat the game anyway." 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HKI_oYMUNK4

I'm not alone in being alone? lol, I get the sentiment but I've never understood how knowing there are others suffering is supposed to make one feel better. Still I'm interested in hearing your story if you don't mind, why you feel similarly. I might be a lost cause but perhaps there's still hope for you.

You're correct, it's technically always possible my prince charming so to speak will show up and solve all my problems. Unfortunately I don't see how that'll realistically happen. Perhaps my parents wake up one day and decide to be parents (lol no). Otherwise I don't get out at all, just sit in my room all day so there's no opportunity for anything to change. I still have the internet and video games to help cope, but once I lose those and am put into far worse living conditions I wonder if I'll still want to endure.

Ha, if I had the motivation to do all that stuff I wouldn't be making this thread. I imagine my lack of loved ones is a notable factor towards my disinterest in everything. I'll watch the video though thanks.



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terrible advices, this dude doesn't want to work, why you give him advices involving work? the best option is to move to a country in which you can live on welfare.



ruffy37 said:
terrible advices, this dude doesn't want to work, why you give him advices involving work? the best option is to move to a country in which you can live on welfare.

I'm already in the U.S., thing is I don't consider spending every day alone on the street doing nothing living. My mind wouldn't be able to handle that.



Lonely_Dolphin said:
DarthMetalliCube said:

I feel like (or at least in the past) I'm in the same boat at times my dude, you are not alone. The best thing I can say is to just hang in there, as you just never know what can transpire in life, and hanging around to find out what sorts of adventures and unanticipated opportunities await is a lot more fun and exciting than just quitting and knowing for sure where and how it ends. Even if things don't quite go as planned, you don't know until you try.

Find something, anything, that makes you happy and motivated, and strive for that. Work on both physical and mental fitness, eat healthy, these sorts of things can make for a happier, stronger, and more healthy mind. You don't have to see the whole picture right now, and frankly you shouldn't b/c that would be overwhelming. Just go one step at a time and one thing will lead to another. If nothing else, keep fighting for your loved ones, and maybe down the line you'll find it rewarding to fight for yourself too.

I assume you're a gamer being on this site, so I'd recommend checking out this vid as it looks at facing the hardships of life from a gamer's perspective. I quite like the quote "maybe god/fate/whatever put your life on hard mode, (or at least it feels that way sometimes). Well beat the game anyway." 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HKI_oYMUNK4

I'm not alone in being alone? lol, I get the sentiment but I've never understood how knowing there are others suffering is supposed to make one feel better. Still I'm interested in hearing your story if you don't mind, why you feel similarly. I might be a lost cause but perhaps there's still hope for you.

You're correct, it's technically always possible my prince charming so to speak will show up and solve all my problems. Unfortunately I don't see how that'll realistically happen. Perhaps my parents wake up one day and decide to be parents (lol no). Otherwise I don't get out at all, just sit in my room all day so there's no opportunity for anything to change. I still have the internet and video games to help cope, but once I lose those and am put into far worse living conditions I wonder if I'll still want to endure.

Ha, if I had the motivation to do all that stuff I wouldn't be making this thread. I imagine my lack of loved ones is a notable factor towards my disinterest in everything. I'll watch the video though thanks.

Well yes you may not see how these events could transpire but part of the fun is not knowing these things and sticking around to find out. Not saying someone will show up and instantly solve all your problems or you'll have some instant life-changing revelation but things can trend upwards over the long haul, even if it's a slow process.

We all have different coping mechanisms but at least to me knowing I'm not a complete alien and that there are others in the same (or similar) boat helps me cope at least to a slight degree as it gives me a slight sense of connection.

Maybe I over-exaggerated a bit about my own circumstances and I don't know yours but I have some pretty rough social anxiety (and I'm pretty sure I'm also on the autism spectrum at least in a minor capacity), traits which have contributed in me being alone much of my life, just put it that way.. I do have a (very) small circle of good friends and a handful of loving family members but that can only carry you so far...

If you don't mind me asking what are the issues with your parents?

Honestly, force yourself to go out. Even if it's something small. I basically had to force myself to ask this girl out on a date and I absolutely dreaded the day we were to hang out. Was basically in agony with anxiety the entire day before and the day of. Tried to maintain a happy, positive attitude but it didn't work out, though I was still happy I pushed myself to do that, if only to get the experience.



 

"We hold these truths t-be self-ful evident. All men and women created by the.. Go-you know the.. you know the thing!" - Joe Biden

DarthMetalliCube said:

Well yes you may not see how these events could transpire but part of the fun is not knowing these things and sticking around to find out. Not saying someone will show up and instantly solve all your problems or you'll have some instant life-changing revelation but things can trend upwards over the long haul, even if it's a slow process.

We all have different coping mechanisms but at least to me knowing I'm not a complete alien and that there are others in the same (or similar) boat helps me cope at least to a slight degree as it gives me a slight sense of connection.

Maybe I over-exaggerated a bit about my own circumstances and I don't know yours but I have some pretty rough social anxiety (and I'm pretty sure I'm also on the autism spectrum at least in a minor capacity), traits which have contributed in me being alone much of my life, just put it that way.. I do have a (very) small circle of good friends and a handful of loving family members but that can only carry you so far...

If you don't mind me asking what are the issues with your parents?

Honestly, force yourself to go out. Even if it's something small. I basically had to force myself to ask this girl out on a date and I absolutely dreaded the day we were to hang out. Was basically in agony with anxiety the entire day before and the day of. Tried to maintain a happy, positive attitude but it didn't work out, though I was still happy I pushed myself to do that, if only to get the experience.

It's not fun if what transpires isn't good. I do know things are going to get worse, that much is certain.

Would be nice to share that mindset, I just get sadder when I think about how my situation isn't nearly as bad compared to others and feel guilty for not taking advantage of my privileges many wish they could have.

Do you want even more friends? You could instead spend more time with the ones you've got as well as your family to make up the difference. Do your parents count in that handful of loving family members? Definitely a failure on their part if they left you feeling lonely.

They're just typical selfish assholes, I'm not blinded to this just because they're family. They clearly brought me into existence for reasons other than to love and grow together with. When they would interact with me, it's almost always to dole out discipline. Had no luck making good friends at school so I was left with no support system and no one to learn from and share experiences with.

Wow you and I are of completely different minds haha. You are impressively strong to take a failure and see it as a good thing. I take such failures as negative feedback, discouraging me from trying again. Also I do go out on occasion to get food or buy a game, but otherwise I have no reason to.



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Lonely_Dolphin said:
ruffy37 said:
terrible advices, this dude doesn't want to work, why you give him advices involving work? the best option is to move to a country in which you can live on welfare.

I'm already in the U.S., thing is I don't consider spending every day alone on the street doing nothing living. My mind wouldn't be able to handle that.

what does it mean you are already in u.s.? can you live on welfare and get a free appartement, health insurance, enough money per month for food in the u.s.?



Suck it up and get a job is my advice. Nobody likes working, it is called being an adult and doing what one has to do.



Lonely_Dolphin said:
DarthMetalliCube said:

Well yes you may not see how these events could transpire but part of the fun is not knowing these things and sticking around to find out. Not saying someone will show up and instantly solve all your problems or you'll have some instant life-changing revelation but things can trend upwards over the long haul, even if it's a slow process.

We all have different coping mechanisms but at least to me knowing I'm not a complete alien and that there are others in the same (or similar) boat helps me cope at least to a slight degree as it gives me a slight sense of connection.

Maybe I over-exaggerated a bit about my own circumstances and I don't know yours but I have some pretty rough social anxiety (and I'm pretty sure I'm also on the autism spectrum at least in a minor capacity), traits which have contributed in me being alone much of my life, just put it that way.. I do have a (very) small circle of good friends and a handful of loving family members but that can only carry you so far...

If you don't mind me asking what are the issues with your parents?

Honestly, force yourself to go out. Even if it's something small. I basically had to force myself to ask this girl out on a date and I absolutely dreaded the day we were to hang out. Was basically in agony with anxiety the entire day before and the day of. Tried to maintain a happy, positive attitude but it didn't work out, though I was still happy I pushed myself to do that, if only to get the experience.

It's not fun if what transpires isn't good. I do know things are going to get worse, that much is certain.

Would be nice to share that mindset, I just get sadder when I think about how my situation isn't nearly as bad compared to others and feel guilty for not taking advantage of my privileges many wish they could have.

Do you want even more friends? You could instead spend more time with the ones you've got as well as your family to make up the difference. Do your parents count in that handful of loving family members? Definitely a failure on their part if they left you feeling lonely.

They're just typical selfish assholes, I'm not blinded to this just because they're family. They clearly brought me into existence for reasons other than to love and grow together with. When they would interact with me, it's almost always to dole out discipline. Had no luck making good friends at school so I was left with no support system and no one to learn from and share experiences with.

Wow you and I are of completely different minds haha. You are impressively strong to take a failure and see it as a good thing. I take such failures as negative feedback, discouraging me from trying again. Also I do go out on occasion to get food or buy a game, but otherwise I have no reason to.

I'm relatively happy with my small clique of friends and family though I do feel isolated quite a bit, especially now that I'm working from home and no longer go to school. I do sometimes yearn for the days of my 20s when I socialized more often and with more people, though I am ultimately an introvert and take comfort in being alone a lot so it's a constant battle in my head I guess you can say lol.

Parents and my mom's side of the family are, for the most part great and loving, but both my grandparents passed fairly recently and my dad's side has basically no family so my family certainy isn't vast.

Well it might be worth calling out to them if it's as bad with your folks as you say.

Trust me when I say, I have many failures, and regrets. Though I also have some successes. I try to feed on BOTH and use as motivating factors in their own ways. This is how we grow.

It may be cliche as hell but what doesn't kill you makes you stronger. I won't accept defeat.



 

"We hold these truths t-be self-ful evident. All men and women created by the.. Go-you know the.. you know the thing!" - Joe Biden

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