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Forums - General Discussion - Men should never marry, here's why.

Unless someone wants to be 4everalone lol or live with parents. Ideally you have to get married. Even the rich people need family after all they are the ones who will be there for you till the end. Wife, children or your parents. There is only so much you can do with money.



 

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Been dating my girlfriend on and off for about 7 or so years. It's been so long that I don't even know how many years. I'm also not the type that remembers anniversaries or special dates. I also don't buy jewelry and don't really care about being married yet. I believe once I'm in my low 40s then I'll start thinking about getting married.



ArchangelMadzz said:
Don't let anyone rush you to engagement. Be 100% sure. Even if it takes 10 years of dating for you to know what you're getting into.

 

It doesn't matter. Trust me. I lived with my last wife for years before we got married. Once she had that peice of paper she literally became a different woman. And it was not a good transformation.

   

Hey! They got SONY on my amiibo! Wait a minute. Two great gaming tastes that game great together!

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SonytendoAmiibo said:
ArchangelMadzz said:
Don't let anyone rush you to engagement. Be 100% sure. Even if it takes 10 years of dating for you to know what you're getting into.

 

It doesn't matter. Trust me. I lived with my last wife for years before we got married. Once she had that peice of paper she literally became a different woman. And it was not a good transformation.

Fuck, that's encouraging.. Sorry to hear man.



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greenmedic88 said:
Look at marriage from an objective standpoint and realize that it is a civil contract that unifies the assets of two individuals or estates. In other words, it is the act of making a union recognized by the government which means the government now legally governs over said union.

So there is the potential for alimony payments if the merger is dissolved and the splitting of assets. Lesson being, if you choose to enter such a legally binding merger, only do so if both parties contribute assets equally (both pre merger and in terms of productivity while the union remains intact) unless you don't mind potentially losing half of what you brought into the merger and making monthly payments to your former partner to maintain their standard of living.

This is before children are even taken into account. Add child payments in this instance and realize in most Western nations that women are granted custody about 90% of the time. Defaulting on child support payments can put one in arrears, landing them in prison.

Not trying to scare anyone, just making it clear what marriage is. It's a legally binding merger of estates. So know very well what you are buying into if you choose to do so.

Nobody goes into marriage with the idea in mind that theirs will end in divorce, which is obviously a defeatist mindset, but realistically, a good percentage of marriages ed in divorce. There are roughly half the number of divorces per year as there are marriages. 32.2 marriages per 1,000 unwed women and about 16.9 divorces per 1,000 married women. So a 16.9 to 32.2 ratio of divorce to marriage in 2015 which is not the same as saying 16.9 marriages out of 32.2 ended in divorce.

Thats the main issue here. Most of the cases of unfair divorce setlements tend to happen when the man is the main provider. family courts still favor the mother in most cases, but child support is so miniscule when being compared to alamony when the man is the sole provider. The sole provider has to keep the ex living in a maner in wich they where acostume to, but often thats impossible as the assets are split in half, and the living expenses more than double since each has to live on their own. 

Like you said, if a man is thinking of getting married, he better make sure they are equal going in. ANd at least both plan on stayinng that way along the years. CUz most often than not, after children, if a man makes a good amount, the mother does not go back to work, so even going in equal terms mid way everything can change.

And its not just men. if the women is the sole earner men get alamoney and half the assets. But the problem as men see it is that that this rarely happens and like 98% of th cases is the man who looses since is the norm for the man to be the primary provider. 

Like you said, or someone else said, marriage is outdated and needs to have huge changes or the marrige rates are gona keep droping every year and divorce rate will keep increasing.

I for one will keep on dating with no plans for marriage, since I have to much to loose and dont know if its my taste or just bad luck, but i havent met any women that put any of them on my economic level for me to even feel safe about even living together.



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eva01beserk said:

Thats the main issue here. Most of the cases of unfair divorce setlements tend to happen when the man is the main provider. family courts still favor the mother in most cases, but child support is so miniscule when being compared to alamony when the man is the sole provider. The sole provider has to keep the ex living in a maner in wich they where acostume to, but often thats impossible as the assets are split in half, and the living expenses more than double since each has to live on their own. 

Like you said, if a man is thinking of getting married, he better make sure they are equal going in. ANd at least both plan on stayinng that way along the years. CUz most often than not, after children, if a man makes a good amount, the mother does not go back to work, so even going in equal terms mid way everything can change.

And its not just men. if the women is the sole earner men get alamoney and half the assets. But the problem as men see it is that that this rarely happens and like 98% of th cases is the man who looses since is the norm for the man to be the primary provider. 

Like you said, or someone else said, marriage is outdated and needs to have huge changes or the marrige rates are gona keep droping every year and divorce rate will keep increasing.

I for one will keep on dating with no plans for marriage, since I have to much to loose and dont know if its my taste or just bad luck, but i havent met any women that put any of them on my economic level for me to even feel safe about even living together.

Divorce rates, at least in the US, according to data from 2015, have been dropping. Of course it also needs to be pointed out that marriage rates are also dropping.

No, this is not some sort of flipping on the perception of marriage by either men or women, or due to positive changes in the current dynamics of marriage, but likely (my own hypothesis) due to an increasing awareness by men of the inherent risks involved in such contracts who actually have the state of mind to do a cost/benefit analysis before signing the contract. Men either know the risks and potential outcomes or they are legally ignorant or emotionally idealistic. 

I believe the incentives for women to enter marriage contracts haven't changed, but the drop offs in numbers are likely attributed to the mindset that if women are enabled to pursue careers in fields that give them a sense of fulfilment, marriage isn't really necessary even though this requires women with life incentives typically attributed to men. Inherent female nurturing instincts can be devoted to pets if necessary. 

The potential upside of population pools of women who are more dedicated to the idea of pursuing advancement in a career field, is that the general population now has women who have the earning power and careers of men, allowing for potential equitable mergers between men and women. Marriages such as this that end in divorce could hypothetically be resolved with a signing of the documents to take it off the books without costly legal maneuvering to split the assets as presumably, they already had separate accounts along with a smaller joint account for day to day expenses and operations and neither party needs to try to "stick it to the other" out of spite or in an attempt to grab as many comforts and resources as possible from the other. 

Of course the problem with this is any professional career woman in such a position would be far less likely to marry before the age of 30 and the decision to have any children will be largely dependent upon where they are in their career, priorities and the ability or willingness to set career aside (even if temporarily) for the other. Sounds just like men except, they have to incubate the baby and presumably take the time off during those initial months following child birth. Either the woman is going to have to place high priority on a child/children (deprioritizing career and advancement), or she is going to have very low incentive for having them, again calling into the question for why such a woman would want a marriage in the first place other than for state mediated companionship. There's no need for it. 



ArchangelMadzz said:
SonytendoAmiibo said:

 

It doesn't matter. Trust me. I lived with my last wife for years before we got married. Once she had that peice of paper she literally became a different woman. And it was not a good transformation.

Fuck, that's encouraging.. Sorry to hear man.

This is why it is very, very important to know and understand a potential partner's incentive for wanting to enter a state enforced civil contract with another. And that's whether you're a man or a woman.

In Sonytendo's case, it seems highly likely that his woman had designs and mechanations of her own that were not in his best interests that all boiled down to getting him to sign that contract. 

Men almost never change fundamentally after marriage; they keep doing what they've been doing all along. Male chameleons who put on airs, peacock, front, flash resources, etc. typically only do this in the courting phase of potential relationships. Most men don't have the resources to even do this, so they may boast about their accomplishments or abilities, etc. all of which will be exposed once a relationship is in progress. 

Women chameleons on the other hand will continue the subterfuge/act all throughout the relationship until it becomes legally binding.

So men; be aware of this. Try to use that left brain when assessing a woman and your relationship with her rather than the right. It's tough, it can be painful, but not as much as being in a situation like Sonytendo's. 



greenmedic88 said:
ArchangelMadzz said:

Fuck, that's encouraging.. Sorry to hear man.

This is why it is very, very important to know and understand a potential partner's incentive for wanting to enter a state enforced civil contract with another. And that's whether you're a man or a woman.

In Sonytendo's case, it seems highly likely that his woman had designs and mechanations of her own that were not in his best interests that all boiled down to getting him to sign that contract. 

Men almost never change fundamentally after marriage; they keep doing what they've been doing all along. Male chameleons who put on airs, peacock, front, flash resources, etc. typically only do this in the courting phase of potential relationships. Most men don't have the resources to even do this, so they may boast about their accomplishments or abilities, etc. all of which will be exposed once a relationship is in progress. 

Women chameleons on the other hand will continue the subterfuge/act all throughout the relationship until it becomes legally binding.

So men; be aware of this. Try to use that left brain when assessing a woman and your relationship with her rather than the right. It's tough, it can be painful, but not as much as being in a situation like Sonytendo's. 

 

Designs and mechanations. What a perfect description of my exwife. I just call her a bitch.

   

Hey! They got SONY on my amiibo! Wait a minute. Two great gaming tastes that game great together!

Switch FC: SW-0398-8858-1969

LadyJasmine said:

I think any guy who marries me will be happier I think.

 

 

Unlike most women I wont think it odd he likes to watch Star Wars or play video games as I likely be playing with him 

how many private message proposals did you get after posting this up haha?



 

 

curl-6 said:
m_csquare said:
This thread is sooo depressing. You need someone in your life. Maybe not right now, but when you're old; when you need your denture to chew your dinner, you'll wish you have that special person.

While most human beings do, sooner or later, desire an intimate partner, the reality is not everyone will attain one, just like not everyone will attain a high paying job, own their own house, or live passed the age of 50.

On the bright side though, the odds aren't bad. Globally, there are 101 men to every 100 women, so even taking into account that some people are asexual/not interested in relationships/etc, the vast majority of people should be able to find a partner. A minority will miss out, but that's just how the cookie crumbles.

He is right though it is depressing. Sounds like 80% of guys on here haven given up already lol.