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Forums - General Discussion - Saving sex for marriage... Avoiding Lust

the2real4mafol on 28 June 2013

Marriage should be an option for people but it makes no difference whether you have sex before marriage or not. What if you end up hating the person you marry? It ain't pretty, just look at the disaster arranged marriage is



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mysticwolf on 28 June 2013

^^^That;s a good point; marriage is not always properly used and doesn't always mean you love each other.



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Calmador on 02 July 2013
Serious_frusting said:
What superchunk said.

Also i wouldn't want to have to feel pressured into getting married just to experience sex.


Hey Serious

I don't think your suppose to feel pressured... because at that point... because of self-control... you wouldn't feel pressured. I'll put myself as an example. Iol I don't feel pressured to get married JUST for sex. I'd really want to get married though because I look forward to being a father and husband... especially a father... kids are gonna be awesome :D

Sex to me while I feel the same as a lot of guys out there... I feel the same thing, temptation. The difference is I believe in God and because of God I choose to resist and not let it control me. Not let it make me a slave to some pretty girl. Not let it be like a tyrant to me. I choose God's way and because of it... I have gained the will to look away when a good looking girl walks by.. or appears on TV. I don't feel pressured... I feel more in control, more liberated, more empowered and have a MUCH higher respect for women in general than I used to... where as before I think it would be everyday that I'd be scaming to try to get some girl in bed.

Again, I don't feel pressured into getting married and I'm sure God can do that for you too.



All gaming systems, consoles/PC, have thier perks... why fight over preferences? I like Coke and you like Pepsi, that's it, let's not fight over which toy we like best cause that's what they are. Is someone's preference in a toy important or is the relationship between you and your neighbor more important? Answer is obvious, but THE most important thing is your relationship with God almighty. God Bless you in Jesus's name.

I can communicate without talking... I can send a loved one money without actually sending money... and I can commit theft without the product disappearing, the point of theft is the point of theft not one of it's possible symptoms which is the product dissappearing. The thief wants to gain something without paying for it, that's the point of theft, the thief doesn't have to care or anybody else has to care if the product dissappears. The product dissappearing is just a possible symptom of theft. Gifts are sacrfices, in order to give a gift, it has to be a genuine sacrfice/gift, meaning a copy of the game isn't still in your PC. Piracy is theft and/or being a culprit of theft.

Zkuq on 02 July 2013

What's wrong with lust as long as you control it and not the other way around? And I'm definitely not saying that controlling lust is forbidding it.



Calmador on 02 July 2013
Soleron said:

As a purely practical consideration, don't you need to make sure you're compatible? Are you sure she is fertile?

Human love, the biological construct, is BOTH physical and psychological. Sex is a completely natural and complementary part of it.Saying that avoiding sex allows a better relationship doesn't match up with how we know things work. It is obviously your choice, but your way is not better.

You mention "pure mind" and "self control" - why does the Bible and/or you imply that sex is dirty? Literally what is wrong with it, in an otherwise healthy relationship? What is the negative outcome here?

Finally, and I don't wish to make the thread about this, you imply certainty about the existence of a God, which the VGC audience does not necessarily share. Do make some attempt to seperate your arguments that arise from practical/logical concerns and ones from religious morality, so that we do not conflate them.


You do know that God obviously created sex. Its not that sex is dirty but that it CAN be. I say one word and you'll agree... rape.

This is wrong with it. The things that can go wrong and according to God has said, sex before marriage is the wrong way to go about it. The possible negative (evil) outcomes of sex being done wronly are divorce, aids, players using people up... mistrust of the opposite sex... selfishness. That's what I count so far...

Divorce.... How? If a wife or husband starts having sex others... this can hurt the relationship so far as to end it. No much to explain here...

Aids... As far as we know Aids has been traced back to a man having sex with an animal, a monkey. Sex with animals is something God has disapproved of and the consequence of that as we now know is Aids.

Players.... Do I need to explain this much? I don't think so... as we all know, people in society are out there manipulating others just for sex... this is a hurtful and damaging thing to our social structure. Men and women grow in mistrust of each other because of individuals that have sex without care about anything else but getting IT. This selfish lust at work.

Last and definitely not least... Rape. What is wrong with sex? Its that sex can go wrong... that's what CAN be wrong with sex. Otherwise, I think we're better off looking to God's ways on how to practice sex... in a relationship that is sealed in marriage, between a man and woman only.

You asked how sex can be wrong... what are the negative outcomes... there you go. And it wasn't hard to think of negative things that can happen because of the misuse of sex. Please reconsider okay.. I'm trying to help ya.

EDIT: Also, about my certianty about God's existence... I think I'm allowed to literally post/express myself like so... Its almost like you commanded me to not talk there. There's nothing wrong with the way I posted... and if all or some of VG charts don't share my belief... that is irrelevant. I think you really should reconsider what you said about that too.



All gaming systems, consoles/PC, have thier perks... why fight over preferences? I like Coke and you like Pepsi, that's it, let's not fight over which toy we like best cause that's what they are. Is someone's preference in a toy important or is the relationship between you and your neighbor more important? Answer is obvious, but THE most important thing is your relationship with God almighty. God Bless you in Jesus's name.

I can communicate without talking... I can send a loved one money without actually sending money... and I can commit theft without the product disappearing, the point of theft is the point of theft not one of it's possible symptoms which is the product dissappearing. The thief wants to gain something without paying for it, that's the point of theft, the thief doesn't have to care or anybody else has to care if the product dissappears. The product dissappearing is just a possible symptom of theft. Gifts are sacrfices, in order to give a gift, it has to be a genuine sacrfice/gift, meaning a copy of the game isn't still in your PC. Piracy is theft and/or being a culprit of theft.

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sales2099 on 02 July 2013

It is our nature, completely healthy to do so, and you won't have that "what the hell do I do now" on your wedding night lol



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melbye on 02 July 2013

Did you know marriage for love was very uncommon until the late 1700's?



kidgold17 on 02 July 2013

Me and my wife saved sex for marriage. It's not that hard as long as you both share the same values. Having only been with only one person I have no idea what sexual incompatibility means, so i guess it's not a problem for us. Being able to control yourself over any conditioned desire is always mentally healthy, yes I'm a christian, but I support others to practice self-control in every area of their lives.



Calmador on 02 July 2013
Zkuq said:
What's wrong with lust as long as you control it and not the other way around? And I'm definitely not saying that controlling lust is forbidding it.

The problem with lust is that it leds to evil actions and it can clearly overwhelm us. I don't think you can control it... better said, I'm sure you can't because I have tried to control it for years... I honestly think its a miracle where I am now in comparison to where I was...

Proverbs 6:27-29
27 Can a man scoop fire into his lap
without his clothes being burned?
28 Can a man walk on hot coals
without his feet being scorched?
29 So is he who sleeps with another man’s wife;
no one who touches her will go unpunished.



All gaming systems, consoles/PC, have thier perks... why fight over preferences? I like Coke and you like Pepsi, that's it, let's not fight over which toy we like best cause that's what they are. Is someone's preference in a toy important or is the relationship between you and your neighbor more important? Answer is obvious, but THE most important thing is your relationship with God almighty. God Bless you in Jesus's name.

I can communicate without talking... I can send a loved one money without actually sending money... and I can commit theft without the product disappearing, the point of theft is the point of theft not one of it's possible symptoms which is the product dissappearing. The thief wants to gain something without paying for it, that's the point of theft, the thief doesn't have to care or anybody else has to care if the product dissappears. The product dissappearing is just a possible symptom of theft. Gifts are sacrfices, in order to give a gift, it has to be a genuine sacrfice/gift, meaning a copy of the game isn't still in your PC. Piracy is theft and/or being a culprit of theft.

Calmador on 02 July 2013
melbye said:
Did you know marriage for love was very uncommon until the late 1700's?


Trends don't matter... they are subject to literally anyone.

I think what matters is looking for the 100% correct thing to do... which would be found in God's will. In order to have a better understanding of that though would to understand the why about Jesus Christ... his purpose will show you a lot more.



All gaming systems, consoles/PC, have thier perks... why fight over preferences? I like Coke and you like Pepsi, that's it, let's not fight over which toy we like best cause that's what they are. Is someone's preference in a toy important or is the relationship between you and your neighbor more important? Answer is obvious, but THE most important thing is your relationship with God almighty. God Bless you in Jesus's name.

I can communicate without talking... I can send a loved one money without actually sending money... and I can commit theft without the product disappearing, the point of theft is the point of theft not one of it's possible symptoms which is the product dissappearing. The thief wants to gain something without paying for it, that's the point of theft, the thief doesn't have to care or anybody else has to care if the product dissappears. The product dissappearing is just a possible symptom of theft. Gifts are sacrfices, in order to give a gift, it has to be a genuine sacrfice/gift, meaning a copy of the game isn't still in your PC. Piracy is theft and/or being a culprit of theft.