Do it at a mcdonalds. let them buy whatever they want. they'll be distracted. trust me.

Just don't BS. If you're concerned about coming off as shallow, don't be.

In the end, if you're going to have a physical relationship with someone and something like weight is going to be an issue as far as attraction goes, then it's not going to work out. Stay friends if you can, assuming you get along that well, but just let her know that the physical attraction just isn't there and that this isn't working for you, which is what sounds like is the truth. 

What OP did you read? I think it it obviously suggested the former.

Also. Dude. It's just sex. You're over-dramatizing it way too much.

Double agreed.  In this day and age people have sex without being in love or even being in a defined relationship so acting like he just went along to get what he wanted...like this "why buy the milk when you can have the cow" attitude applies is old fashioned and not really relevant.  Putting so much emphasis on the fact that he HAD to have sex with her is nothing more than an asumption, and pretty far reaching at that.

The OP came on this site to post a problem he was having, knowing full well that there was a problem for both him and this girl (trying to spare her feelings).  The sex part was only to best illustrate the extent of unattraction he has been feeling.  He was asking for advice to get out of this situation so that he wouldn't be doing that.  Not to be judged.

Were you meaning to quote the OP and not me?

Because I'm in no need of advice on this.

For crying out loud.

(1) Of course it matters what your friends think. They are your friends. They are an important part of your life. Their opinions matter to you. They want what is best for you. And in this case, the OP's friends certainly know that this fat lady is not what is best for him. In other words, he can do better.

(2) It is not 'shallow' to not be attracted to a fat person. It is normal. It is also not shallow not to be attracted to members of the same sex, it is not shallow not to be attracted to certain physical features, it is not shallow not to be attracted to someone with messed up teeth. These are perfectly acceptable. These do not make somebody a worse person.

(3) It is not wrong to try a relationship out. It happens. What relationship begins with two partners being equally attracted to one another in the same ways and for the same things? None.

(4) The guy tried the relationship and it didn't work. Now he wants out. This happens. He didn't get married to the woman and then come back around and say "I want a divorce because I never loved you." Quit painting him as an evil man.

(5) Those of you criticizing him are likely those who have to settle for an unattractive mate. In your eyes you see yourself as superior to those who will not settle for mediocrity, because you think to yourself, "I see beneath the surface, I care about personality and not looks, unlike those lesser people." Here you stereotype attractive people as possessing inferior characters, which is not only incorrect but is offensive. The crime? Being attractive and wanting an attractive mate.

In society today we have pressure to shame and diminish all 'groups' that have been historically empowered. This tendency is extending itself to attractive people. Instead of looking at unattractive people as, well, unattractive, we are subtly encouraged to judge the attractive ones as oppressive, unintelligent, uncaring, unfeeling, and lesser. This is a perfect example of ressentiment.

Firstly, whilst I can respect not feeling attracted to someone and being honest with oneself, asking this kind of advice on this kind of website's forum tells me that you are almost certainly as fatuous and rebarbative in your day to day life as your opening subject line and post suggest you are.

Secondly, do this lady favor and be completely honest with her. If you still have not called it off, tell her that you are an individual who has teenaged priorities and that you are wasting her time (not yours, as yours is likely of far lesser value) by continuing a relationship that is an obvious farce behind her back.

Thirdly, if you are just looking for a vagina (or other orafice) to masturbate into when not at work or video gaming (the content of your first post suggests this is your only priority when it comes to women), then there are special dolls or even hookers if you are looking for a human experience that will in all liklihood be more cost effective versus ongoing dinners, movies et al.

Hope this advice from VgChartz's forum helps!

Had to use my thesaurus to find the meaning of fatuous and rebarbative.  Now, I can't wait to use those words in everyday conversation!  I still don't see how people judge the entire content of my character based on the content of a thread post.  I guess I put that vibe out there so I'm getting what I deserve.  Anyway, thanks for the input, JimmytheT. :)

You guys have a great day!

I am glad you could glean the half-heartedness and levity of my response.  Seriously though, your phrasing and approach to this issue certainly screams more like "douchebag" rather than decent dude with a personal ethical dilemma regarding a relationship.

And one last thing, remember that as a male of the human species, you are hideously ugly almost all of the time; it is only your personality, integrity and charm that will grant you a worthy mate (or mates if you are into that sort of thing).

OP, I was in a very similar relationship a few years ago. Met a girl online, had no idea she would be as big as she really was when we decided to meet in person after a few weeks, tried to give it a shot to see how it would work instead of immediately blowing her off, couldn't bring myself to take her seriously. After a while, I decided to be honest about my feelings and tell her that I wanted her to get regular exercise with me and let me help her with her diet, otherwise I couldn't get serious about her. We'd go through cycles where she'd try for a little while, then just give up and blame it on one thing or another, like a bad knee keeping her from exercise or some crap about needing ___ amount of caffeine every day for her body not to go into shock. I told her that her problem is self discipline, not anything body related. Even though I ultimately broke up with her, she later thanked me for showing her some personal changes that she needed to make in order to live healthier and find a meaningful relationship with someone else who could be more tolerant of her fat.

It's not easy to find someone you click with in terms of chemistry, but knowing what your body and mind is telling you in terms of your attraction to her doesn't make you a jerk. If she truly wants to take the relationship serious, she (both of you, really) must be willing to make sacrifices. A relationship is all about making sacrifices. There's probably no way to tell her without hurting her feelings a little bit, but what you're doing now will only hurt the both of your more in the long run. Tell her that you would like for her to start making positive changes in her life that will benefit her long-term health and that you're willing to do whatever it takes to make it happen. Set reachable goals along the way. Help her to get into a routine. Ask if there is any change that she would like to see from you so it doesn't feel like she's the only one putting in so much work and effort.

If she's unwilling to make those kind of sacrifices, tell her that you enjoyed the time you spent, but it's ultimately not going to work for you. You'd have nothing to feel guilty about after that.