I've attempted Nuzlockes three times. My first was in Fall 2010 playing HeartGold.
Mostly for the Friends you'll make. Friends you didn't choose or want. Friends you'll cherish that much more knowing you could lose them at any moment.
Fall of 2010 was not the best part of my life. I was a bit isolated and alone. So maybe I was doing that thing where you become friends with a volleyball on a desert island, but one of my closest friends at the time was a little weirdo named Piconjo.
It is strange that a Zubat (caught from that Dark Cave at level 3) became so important. Zubat has a reputation of being a sort of omnipresent Bidoof, except without being able to learn most of the HM moves. And though I was a bit softer on Zubat than many players, I didn't really think about him much at first. Even his name, Piconjo, was a reference to an obscure character on some old cartoons at Newgrounds. Sort of as a reference to his being from a dark cave rarely visited. besides, I already had Jazza the Totodile and Gagsy the Pidgey, so why would I need a Zubat.
Somehow though, Piconjo always gave me the help I needed. When I went up against Falkner, and was taken aback by how effective a Pidgeotto withKeen Eye and Roost could be to my budding party, Piconjo prevented a massacre by using Supersonic, giving Jazza an opening to save the day with Water Gun. When Bugsy came out with his Scyther, boasting a powerful Bug-type move and some nasty stats, Piconjo had the double resistance that made him able to take that hit. Piconjo never faced Whitney's Miltank (playing at the Game Corner for three hours was totally worth it because of the Dratini with Dragon Rage prize), but he defeated that darn Clefairy by Biting at it so it couldn't get a hit in. And when going into Morty's gym, the same Bite was a nightmare to all of the Ghost Pokemon.
At this point, Piconjo was at Level 20, but was about two random encounters away from reaching 21. Zubats evolve at Level 22, and receive a big stat boost upon doing so, so I decided to train Piconjo a bit before taking Morty on.
Would you like to guess how Piconjo died? Did I get involved in some part of the story by sequence breaking? Did he evolve before I went back to the gym, where he fought off Gengar to save the day? Perhaps I overexterted my team, and only Piconjo's bravery got them to safety?
No.
It (I can't remember the gender) was hanging out on Route 39. It was only Level 16, somewhat lower than Piconjo. Piconjo was at full HP, and the plan was to Wing Attack and/or Bite some weaker foes for safe XP. And looking back, I'm not sure if anything could have been done differently. The Pokemon of Route 39 were weaker than Piconjo, I was at full HP, and already made a visit at the nearby Pokemon Center about 45 seconds earlier.
But as it turns out, Rattata learns Hyper Fang at Level 16. Hyper Fang has a base power of 80, but STAB made it a de feacto 120. Throw in the fact that Rattata's Attack is actually decent and the chance of a critical hit...
Before late 2010, I was wondering about how games comapred to other mediums as a way of conveying emotions, ideas, and meaning. Afterwards, the context of this question changed. It was less about "Can Games do This?" to "Can Books/Movies/Paintings ever compare to video games?"
Regardless of the answer, that experience changed me. Not my life, on account of it being "just a game." It changed me. Ever since that day about four and a half years ago, I have been more willing to greet strangers, to protect others, to see the beauty in the mundane, and to love. Piconjo was never "real," but I was. And now I know how to do reality better. So somehow, Piconjo did more to make me a better person than most humans I've met ever have.
Sometimes, even when you do everything right, it may not be enough. People will suffer when they are not at fault. And this is horrible.
This might sound a bit random, but I am an atheist. There are a few reasons for this, some of which are hypothetical in nature, but my biggest reason largely lies in this experience I had in late 2010. Regardless of the existence of a God who judges us, I would not change my behavior. Above all else, I do my best to follow a certain morality based on my understanding of myself, others, and the universe we live in. If God were to come down beside me this very moment, both very dramatically and with a great argument about why I wasn't hallucinating... I would probably shit myself. He's sounds pretty intimidating. But I would not change how I lived. I do my best to live in a matter where myself and others can prosper, live and die as we see fit, and when possible, become what we choose to be. That is all.
And without that little bundle of blue and purple pixels and data about HP and Special Defense, it would have taken me a long time to live that way, assuming it were ever possible.
Love and tolerate.
