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Forums - Gaming - Kratos would lose 1vs1 against Conker

Dgc1808 on 02 March 2013
think-man said:
IIIIITHE1IIIII said:
Conker has defeated a terminator haystack, a singing shit monster, a squirrel Dracula and Heinrich the xenomorph. Additionally, he swam through sewer waste, fed a rat until it exploded, pissed on fire monsters, rode a dinosaur to kill cavemen fighters and a giant and survived the D-day.

And he is a fucking squirrel. Kratos is a bitch in comparison.


FUCK YEAH!!! I mean kratos only slays gods and titans he is no match for a squirrel!!!! 


Gods, titans, giant centaurs, giant minotaurs, multiple cyclopses at once, women, barbarian war lords, hell, and brings forth the end of the world in the process. 

 

 

 

I think Conker's got this one.



4 ≈ One

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NobleTeam360 on 02 March 2013

Hmmm no Kratos would destroy just about anybody in a 1v1.



forest-spirit on 02 March 2013

Few characters have a chance against Conker's awsomeness.



luigiman5555 on 02 March 2013

Rare would just kill Conker again. They're not like they used to be.



IIIIITHE1IIIII on 02 March 2013
pezus said:
d21lewis said:

Because people are retarded.  I bought the original for N64 and I bought the Xbox version.  There are a couple of swear words that are censored and one or two jokes that got messed up (like changing Conker's glass of milk from the movie "A Clockwork Orange" to a chalice).  People  Gamers make a big deal out of nothing.  The Xbox version is awesome and is still to this day one of the most played games in my house.  I'd post a pic of them side by side if I'm not too lazy to dig out my N64 cart.

What the fuck! That's a huge mistake. I watched the intro on YT a month ago and it was one of the most epic intros ever, purely because I know and like the movie. Hmm there must be something else to it. Nvm, just checked wikipedia and most of the complaints seem to be about the lack of swearing. That's not too bad.

 

A giant cavewoman (?) also had notably smaller boobs, which is inexcusable, while the chieftain had much smaller scars on his ass after Conker used a dinosaur to bite it several times. (Also pretty sure that they censored away his small penis.) Conker's girlfriend, Berri, also had a notably smaller ass.

Additionally, the original had several awesome multiplayer modes. Including a 2 dinosaurs vs 2-6 cavemen mode where the dinosaurs would pick up the cavemen and feed a baby dinosaur while the cavemen would try to collect dinosaur eggs to gain points, a hoverboard racing mode, a 4-player tank mode, a mode where squirrel civilians tried to get past a tediz blockade and a war mode for up to 4 players and 8 or so bots, and a few others. In the remake, only the war mode remained. Though it was severely fleshed out with things like online multiplayer.

Furthermore,

Conker clearly looks better in the original. And his mouth's movements were actually more complex in the original version (though these images obviously won't show that).

 

In short: Fuck the remake.



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d21lewis on 02 March 2013
pezus said:
IIIIITHE1IIIII said:

 

A giant cavewoman (?) also had notably smaller boobs, which is inexcusable, while the chieftain had much smaller scars on his ass after Conker used a dinosaur to bite it several times. (Also pretty sure that they censored away his small penis.) Conker's girlfriend, Berri, also had a notably smaller ass.

Additionally, the original had several awesome multiplayer modes. Including a 2 dinosaurs vs 2-6 cavemen mode where the dinosaurs would pick up the cavemen and feed a baby dinosaur while the cavemen would try to collect dinosaur eggs to gain points, a hoverboard racing mode, a 4-player tank mode, a mode where squirrel civilians tried to get past a tediz blockade and a war mode for up to 4 players and 8 or so bots, and a few others. In the remake, only the war mode remained. Though it was severely fleshed out with things like online multiplayer.

Furthermore,

Conker clearly looks better in the original. And his mouth's movements were actually more complex in the original version (though these images obviously won't show that).

Smaller boobs, no penis, no Clockwork Orange, smaller ass etc...wtf.

Now I'm completely sold on the idea that Conker N64>Conker Xbox


It's true, I guess.  But it's a lot easier to masturbate to Jugga when she's composed of more than 20 polygons.



d21lewis on 02 March 2013

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GVxaS25ookw
vs.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fHqBsc6k4II

You be the judge.

Conker is so badass, he isn't even fighting Kratos anymore. He's fighting himself!



ToraReaper on 02 March 2013

Dude conker would whoop Kratos' ass, he has access to everything, at the end of BFD he won the game and could conjure up anything as if he had access to a cheat console or something. Also he's got a smile so cute it could kill. Last but not least Frying Pan>Blades attached to wrists



think-man on 02 March 2013
Dgc1808 said:
think-man said:
IIIIITHE1IIIII said:
Conker has defeated a terminator haystack, a singing shit monster, a squirrel Dracula and Heinrich the xenomorph. Additionally, he swam through sewer waste, fed a rat until it exploded, pissed on fire monsters, rode a dinosaur to kill cavemen fighters and a giant and survived the D-day.

And he is a fucking squirrel. Kratos is a bitch in comparison.


FUCK YEAH!!! I mean kratos only slays gods and titans he is no match for a squirrel!!!! 


Gods, titans, giant centaurs, giant minotaurs, multiple cyclopses at once, women, barbarian war lords, hell, and brings forth the end of the world in the process. 

 

 

 

I think Conker's got this one.


Yeah silly thread it was so obvious that Conkers got this ^^



 

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