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Forums - General Discussion - being gay a choice vs born that way.

 

being gay a choice vs born that way.

It's a lifestyle choice 120 25.53%
 
Your born that way 250 53.19%
 
no opinion 36 7.66%
 
other---for anything I missed 62 13.19%
 
Total:468
MrBubbles on 21 May 2011
sapphi_snake said:
pizzahut451 said:


No, you are not. You just think you are because the socitey or community you live in makes people think everyone who isnt in love with gays is homophobe and evil. As much as you find hard to believe, there are people who arent comftorbale with people who behave like homosexuals, and they dont have to be looked down upon by people like you.

There are also people who aren't comfortable around blacks. They shouldn't be looked down upon either I suppose, no?


no.  why would you look down on somebody for something they cant control?



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Cheebee on 21 May 2011
Euphoria14 said:

They are actually still uncomfortable with the whole situation. They still say to him that he is their son and that his name is still Jason. From the outside looking in it may seem really mean, but in their shoes it must be tougher than any of us could imagine.

To think of your first born child, your son, raising him for 25 years and trying your best to do what is right for him, only to then have to accept that your son is now your daughter...

Hmm.. I can imagine, yeah. It must be tough on them.

Well, at least they still accept him as their child. I'm pretty sure there are a lot of parents who wouldn't want anything to do with him/her in such a situation. I hope it gets better over time.



Nintendo Network ID: Cheebee   3DS Code: 2320 - 6113 - 9046

 

Euphoria14 on 21 May 2011
Cheebee said:
Euphoria14 said:

They are actually still uncomfortable with the whole situation. They still say to him that he is their son and that his name is still Jason. From the outside looking in it may seem really mean, but in their shoes it must be tougher than any of us could imagine.

To think of your first born child, your son, raising him for 25 years and trying your best to do what is right for him, only to then have to accept that your son is now your daughter...

Hmm.. I can imagine, yeah. It must be tough on them.

Well, at least they still accept him as their child. I'm pretty sure there are a lot of parents who wouldn't want anything to do with him/her in such a situation. I hope it gets better over time.


I am positive that over time it will get better. 

However, what surprises me most is my grandmother. She lived through the 30's, 40's etc... and he did not want to tell her because she always loved him most and was scared that she would get freaked out about it and not be very accepting.

He finally worked up the courage and told her...

 

Now they spend more time together than ever before and I believe she is probably most supportive of him than anyone else. It is so fucking awesome.

She even takes him to his modeling shoots and lets him spend time at her home.



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Rath on 21 May 2011
Euphoria14 said:
Cheebee said:
Euphoria14 said:

They are actually still uncomfortable with the whole situation. They still say to him that he is their son and that his name is still Jason. From the outside looking in it may seem really mean, but in their shoes it must be tougher than any of us could imagine.

To think of your first born child, your son, raising him for 25 years and trying your best to do what is right for him, only to then have to accept that your son is now your daughter...

Hmm.. I can imagine, yeah. It must be tough on them.

Well, at least they still accept him as their child. I'm pretty sure there are a lot of parents who wouldn't want anything to do with him/her in such a situation. I hope it gets better over time.


I am positive that over time it will get better. 

However, what surprises me most is my grandmother. She lived through the 30's, 40's etc... and he did not want to tell her because she always loved him most and was scared that she would get freaked out about it and not be very accepting.

He finally worked up the courage and told her...

 

Now they spend more time together than ever before and I believe she is probably most supportive of him than anyone else. It is so fucking awesome.

She even takes him to his modeling shoots and lets him spend time at her home.


Out of interest, why do you refer to 'him' and 'he' all the time rather than 'her' and 'she'?



Euphoria14 on 21 May 2011
Rath said:
Euphoria14 said:
Cheebee said:
Euphoria14 said:

They are actually still uncomfortable with the whole situation. They still say to him that he is their son and that his name is still Jason. From the outside looking in it may seem really mean, but in their shoes it must be tougher than any of us could imagine.

To think of your first born child, your son, raising him for 25 years and trying your best to do what is right for him, only to then have to accept that your son is now your daughter...

Hmm.. I can imagine, yeah. It must be tough on them.

Well, at least they still accept him as their child. I'm pretty sure there are a lot of parents who wouldn't want anything to do with him/her in such a situation. I hope it gets better over time.


I am positive that over time it will get better. 

However, what surprises me most is my grandmother. She lived through the 30's, 40's etc... and he did not want to tell her because she always loved him most and was scared that she would get freaked out about it and not be very accepting.

He finally worked up the courage and told her...

 

Now they spend more time together than ever before and I believe she is probably most supportive of him than anyone else. It is so fucking awesome.

She even takes him to his modeling shoots and lets him spend time at her home.


Out of interest, why do you refer to 'him' and 'he' all the time rather than 'her' and 'she'?

As stated in this thread it is a hard adjustment after knowing him as my brother for 25 of my 27 years on this Earth.

It is harder to understand when you're on the outside looking in.



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Onyxmeth on 22 May 2011
Euphoria14 said:

I believe it is not a choice and I have my beliefs as to why and those beliefs came from experience.

 

Growing up in my household was tough at time because ever since my brother was around 3-4 years old he would constantly get caught taking my sisters and/or mothers clothing and wearing them. Whenever this happened he would get yelled at by my parents.

Now some may think that is mean, but it is understandable for a parent to freak out when their son thinks he is their daughter. This continued all throughout his life until he was about 25 years old. That is when he decided to move away and told us it was because he did not feel comfortable living a lie.

We asked what he meant and he told us it was because all his life he has felt like a woman trapped in a mans body. He was upset when he would get yelled at for trying to be who he felt he was supposed to be. Of course we stayed in contact as I love my family regardless of the choices they make or who they want to be.

 

After years of being away he recently moved back here. He had his named legally changed, took medication to develop breasts and now does modeling.

 

I doubt he could do all of this because he made a choice to become transgender. He was able to do all of this because that is who he really was. That is what he always felt, and now that he took that leap and decided to live his life the way he felt he was meant to he is now happier than I have ever seen and also much more confident.

Making a choice to just start being gay as opposed to being born that way does not yield these kinds of results. I don't care what anyone says.

I don't understand this at all. What exactly is feeling like a woman or feeling like a man? I'm a male and I can't identify anything within my mental makeup that sends out signs that I'm a man. Does anyone else have such signals to identify themselves as a certain gender? 



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Kasz216 on 22 May 2011
Onyxmeth said:
Euphoria14 said:

I believe it is not a choice and I have my beliefs as to why and those beliefs came from experience.

 

Growing up in my household was tough at time because ever since my brother was around 3-4 years old he would constantly get caught taking my sisters and/or mothers clothing and wearing them. Whenever this happened he would get yelled at by my parents.

Now some may think that is mean, but it is understandable for a parent to freak out when their son thinks he is their daughter. This continued all throughout his life until he was about 25 years old. That is when he decided to move away and told us it was because he did not feel comfortable living a lie.

We asked what he meant and he told us it was because all his life he has felt like a woman trapped in a mans body. He was upset when he would get yelled at for trying to be who he felt he was supposed to be. Of course we stayed in contact as I love my family regardless of the choices they make or who they want to be.

 

After years of being away he recently moved back here. He had his named legally changed, took medication to develop breasts and now does modeling.

 

I doubt he could do all of this because he made a choice to become transgender. He was able to do all of this because that is who he really was. That is what he always felt, and now that he took that leap and decided to live his life the way he felt he was meant to he is now happier than I have ever seen and also much more confident.

Making a choice to just start being gay as opposed to being born that way does not yield these kinds of results. I don't care what anyone says.

I don't understand this at all. What exactly is feeling like a woman or feeling like a man? I'm a male and I can't identify anything within my mental makeup that sends out signs that I'm a man. Does anyone else have such signals to identify themselves as a certain gender? 

It's more a case of feeling something is off.

Imagine you were put in a womans body tommorrow.  You would never really get used to that right?  Basically what it's like for a transgendered person.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transgender



Onyxmeth on 22 May 2011
Kasz216 said:
Onyxmeth said:
Euphoria14 said:

I believe it is not a choice and I have my beliefs as to why and those beliefs came from experience.

 

Growing up in my household was tough at time because ever since my brother was around 3-4 years old he would constantly get caught taking my sisters and/or mothers clothing and wearing them. Whenever this happened he would get yelled at by my parents.

Now some may think that is mean, but it is understandable for a parent to freak out when their son thinks he is their daughter. This continued all throughout his life until he was about 25 years old. That is when he decided to move away and told us it was because he did not feel comfortable living a lie.

We asked what he meant and he told us it was because all his life he has felt like a woman trapped in a mans body. He was upset when he would get yelled at for trying to be who he felt he was supposed to be. Of course we stayed in contact as I love my family regardless of the choices they make or who they want to be.

 

After years of being away he recently moved back here. He had his named legally changed, took medication to develop breasts and now does modeling.

 

I doubt he could do all of this because he made a choice to become transgender. He was able to do all of this because that is who he really was. That is what he always felt, and now that he took that leap and decided to live his life the way he felt he was meant to he is now happier than I have ever seen and also much more confident.

Making a choice to just start being gay as opposed to being born that way does not yield these kinds of results. I don't care what anyone says.

I don't understand this at all. What exactly is feeling like a woman or feeling like a man? I'm a male and I can't identify anything within my mental makeup that sends out signs that I'm a man. Does anyone else have such signals to identify themselves as a certain gender? 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transgender

I'm not going to read the whole thing, so is there something from there you wanted me to pull from it or did you just want me to read the definition on that page? From the main paragraph and the section on transexualism, which is where I was directly linked to, none of it answered my question. Again, how exactly does one feel like a certain gender? What is a mental gender identity? I don't wake up every morning and feel like a man. I know I'm one because I possess the traits of a man and I was taught I was a male since I was born. 



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Kasz216 on 22 May 2011
Onyxmeth said:
Kasz216 said:
Onyxmeth said:
Euphoria14 said:

I believe it is not a choice and I have my beliefs as to why and those beliefs came from experience.

 

Growing up in my household was tough at time because ever since my brother was around 3-4 years old he would constantly get caught taking my sisters and/or mothers clothing and wearing them. Whenever this happened he would get yelled at by my parents.

Now some may think that is mean, but it is understandable for a parent to freak out when their son thinks he is their daughter. This continued all throughout his life until he was about 25 years old. That is when he decided to move away and told us it was because he did not feel comfortable living a lie.

We asked what he meant and he told us it was because all his life he has felt like a woman trapped in a mans body. He was upset when he would get yelled at for trying to be who he felt he was supposed to be. Of course we stayed in contact as I love my family regardless of the choices they make or who they want to be.

 

After years of being away he recently moved back here. He had his named legally changed, took medication to develop breasts and now does modeling.

 

I doubt he could do all of this because he made a choice to become transgender. He was able to do all of this because that is who he really was. That is what he always felt, and now that he took that leap and decided to live his life the way he felt he was meant to he is now happier than I have ever seen and also much more confident.

Making a choice to just start being gay as opposed to being born that way does not yield these kinds of results. I don't care what anyone says.

I don't understand this at all. What exactly is feeling like a woman or feeling like a man? I'm a male and I can't identify anything within my mental makeup that sends out signs that I'm a man. Does anyone else have such signals to identify themselves as a certain gender? 

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transgender

I'm not going to read the whole thing, so is there something from there you wanted me to pull from it or did you just want me to read the definition on that page? From the main paragraph and the section on transexualism, which is where I was directly linked to, none of it answered my question. Again, how exactly does one feel like a certain gender? What is a mental gender identity? I don't wake up every morning and feel like a man. I know I'm one because I possess the traits of a man and I was taught I was a male since I was born.

Imagine tommorrow you were transformed into a woman.

How you would feel tommorrow = being transgendered.

It's feeling that you weren't supposed to be born how you were and have the traits you were supposed to have.



Onyxmeth on 22 May 2011
Kasz216 said:
Onyxmeth said:
Euphoria14 said:

I believe it is not a choice and I have my beliefs as to why and those beliefs came from experience.

 

Growing up in my household was tough at time because ever since my brother was around 3-4 years old he would constantly get caught taking my sisters and/or mothers clothing and wearing them. Whenever this happened he would get yelled at by my parents.

Now some may think that is mean, but it is understandable for a parent to freak out when their son thinks he is their daughter. This continued all throughout his life until he was about 25 years old. That is when he decided to move away and told us it was because he did not feel comfortable living a lie.

We asked what he meant and he told us it was because all his life he has felt like a woman trapped in a mans body. He was upset when he would get yelled at for trying to be who he felt he was supposed to be. Of course we stayed in contact as I love my family regardless of the choices they make or who they want to be.

 

After years of being away he recently moved back here. He had his named legally changed, took medication to develop breasts and now does modeling.

 

I doubt he could do all of this because he made a choice to become transgender. He was able to do all of this because that is who he really was. That is what he always felt, and now that he took that leap and decided to live his life the way he felt he was meant to he is now happier than I have ever seen and also much more confident.

Making a choice to just start being gay as opposed to being born that way does not yield these kinds of results. I don't care what anyone says.

I don't understand this at all. What exactly is feeling like a woman or feeling like a man? I'm a male and I can't identify anything within my mental makeup that sends out signs that I'm a man. Does anyone else have such signals to identify themselves as a certain gender? 

It's more a case of feeling something is off.

Imagine you were put in a womans body tommorrow.  You would never really get used to that right?  Basically what it's like for a transgendered person.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Transgender

I would never get used to it if I was put in anyone elses' body, whether they were male or female, but that's simply because I'm used to being myself . That's not really a great line of logic. My point is, what is different inside the minds of the two genders to possibly mentally seperate the two? This seems like a type of people that can't deal with the fact they're either gay or don't fit the typical gender stereotypes, or both. 

Just to play this game though, if you woke up tomorrow and found yourself as the other gender, what exactly would feel wrong to you that wasn't a result of different physical traits and the chemical differences between men and women?



Tag: Became a freaking mod and a complete douche, coincidentally, at the same time.