‘Nintendo 3DS is game for a barf’ is the puntastic and completely inaccurate headline in today’s The Sun. Obviously a bit riled that they were caught out yesterday for exaggerating the problems with the new Nintendo console the ‘newspaper’ has called in medical experts to substantiate their claims.
‘Their man’ Lee Price, 22, played Street Fighter and Pro Evolution Soccer in four 30-minute slots with a ten minute break between each play. For the first thirty minutes of play (during which he sat on a sofa) Lee seemed to be fine and the Doctor agreed. The next session Lee stood up and the Doc noted ‘slight nystagmus, where your eyes race from side-to-side’.
For the third half hour Lee played the game whilst ‘walking idly down the street’. Lee’s pulse and blood pressure has risen, thus proving that the 3DS is having an effect and certainly not because Lee is a bit tubby and having to move. “If this was your resting rate, I’d recommend you saw a GP about high blood pressure,” says Doctor Carol.
It’s not his resting rate Carol, nothing to worry about, but well done The Sun for just slipping in the phrase ‘high blood pressure’.
The Sun does not report how many open manholes Lee fell in to whilst playing his 3DS, nor the amount of times he walked into a tree or got hit by a truck as he wasn’t paying attention whilst crossing the road. Surely these side effects of playing the 3DS whilst ‘walking idly down the street’ are far more serious?
For the final hour Lee is playing the 3DS in a car. Lee is feeling ‘very nauseated’ because his eyes are trying to focus on the 3DS whilst the car rumbles about. He has blood pressure of 140/84, pulse 85. “If this rate is sustained for a long period it could damage circulation. I think the break period needs to be significantly increased,” advises Doctor Carol.
The sun concludes with verdicts from both Lee and Carol.
LEE’S VERDICT: After two hours, it’s time to put it away.
CAROL’S VERDICT: Children should not be left to play on it for hours.
Excellent advice there, The Sun. Well done.
source: http://www.thesixthaxis.com/2011/04/06/the-sun-offers-sensible-3ds-advice/
why do i see Dexter Bennett in front of my mind eye?
“It appeared that there had even been demonstrations to thank Big Brother for raising the chocolate ration to twenty grams a week. And only yesterday, he reflected, it had been announced that the ration was to be reduced to twenty grams a week. Was it possible that they could swallow that, after only twenty-four hours? Yes, they swallowed it.”
- George Orwell, ‘1984’
