You can have all the talent at FPSes in the world, but skill at one genre isn't going to carry over into another. You need to practice on easier platformers before jumping into NES-era Mario games.

The original Super Mario Bros. might be a good place to start; it's still hard, but it's much simpler and the only powerup you need to worry about is the fire flower.

I played Bioshock and fell asleep. Too much BS around

Is this the same Crash that critics praised for it's graphics and controls, but criticised for it's lack of innovation for a platformer?

That is the difference with the Mario series. Each one sets a new level in platform innovation for it's time.

I played SMB3 and i woke up in a hospital

I started crying blood once i saw the PURE EVIL on the screen. Blood started to come out of my ears and mouth and before i knew it or before i  could react to anything, i lost my conciousness. Later, my brother took out the cartdge and threw it on the wall really hard. The cartiidge broke and my brother said that he saw some black bird-like stuff flying out of the cartigde while making some demonic sound that makes you rip yur brain trought your ears and eat it. We later had to burn the NES too, to make sure it wasnt possesed as well. I mean, Nintendo is well know for making games demonic games:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iGOJmdxdjeA

Wow this thread should have been locked WAY long ago

~locking~