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Forums - General Discussion - So you think the worst thing a woman can say is no......think again.

madskillz on 12 December 2008
Comrade Tovya said:
I don't know about the compliment thing now, because he already kind of showed his cards.

I'd change my name, quit my job, and leave the country.. ;)

No seriously though, the direct approach rarely works unless she's been giving you the signs... playing with her hair when you look at her, you catch her taking multiple glances at you (unless there is a big booger hanging out your nose, and that could be why she's staring, so check that first).

I think the smile she gives you is the big clue (if she gives you one of course).

Not really - you can rebound from that faux pas by just being yourself. She just had her defenses up - but give her some time and if you just happen to run into her in certain places.

And lol on the booger. Comeon, man ...

For me, if a woman lights up around me - grins at most things I says - tells me she wants to hug me all the time or be around me all the time, I know she's feelin' me.

Another thing that attracts women? C-O-M-M-I-T-M-E-N-T. Yeah, ladies see a dude with a wedding band, they are like 'Dude is willing to settle down.' They will play extra hard because they  *think* you won't try anything. If you are caught slippin', it is easy to fall. Fortunately, I have never gotten to that point - but doggone.

Any update, hitman? Whassup, playboy?

 



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madskillz on 12 December 2008
steven787 said:
Flow said:
steven787 said:
Angel_DwK said:
Self deprecation is a beautiful art.

It says, "I am confident and self-aware enough to make jokes of my flaws." It is the best way to make (most) girls like you.

Some girls like a cocky guy all the time, these are not the girls for people who post on internet forums.

 

You need to play this card right, some men can do it and look like they are insecure or depressed, and it won't be good.

 

You're right, it's very easy to cross over from humor to sounding like self hate...

Generally though, if you followed my first rule, "listen", then she won't care any way. If she doesn't laugh move on and ask her another question. But at that point after talking, she should laugh at just about anything you say that sounds remotely like a joke. At least in my experience.

QFT

 



steven787 on 12 December 2008

My GF and I went through this tonight.

On the phone before we met, I made a joke, she said something to the effect of "Ummm, Okay."

Then we met, "we" talked for about an hour. Made another stupid joke, "ha ha, you're cute."

Then I "took care of business".  Made a really light joke and she was laughing her ass off.



I would cite regulation, but I know you will simply ignore it.

Angel_DwK on 12 December 2008

@Madskillz...

Yo I understand that your bound to find a girl where a direct approach works which is why in my post I said this works most of the time..


the fact is nothing happened with you and that girl and she approached you.. did you even get a number... a name... hell even a hug?


from the sound of it no... now I was under the impression that guys want to get with a chick... not make them cry and run away....





Predictions.

1. Wii will never reach 50% market share.

2. Kz2 will sell 1.3 first week 3.5 LT.
Sales predictions for 09.

Wii - 69 - 72
PS3 - 32 - 34
X360 - 39 - 41


Comrade Tovya on 12 December 2008
madskillz said:
Comrade Tovya said:
I don't know about the compliment thing now, because he already kind of showed his cards.

I'd change my name, quit my job, and leave the country.. ;)

No seriously though, the direct approach rarely works unless she's been giving you the signs... playing with her hair when you look at her, you catch her taking multiple glances at you (unless there is a big booger hanging out your nose, and that could be why she's staring, so check that first).

I think the smile she gives you is the big clue (if she gives you one of course).

Not really - you can rebound from that faux pas by just being yourself. She just had her defenses up - but give her some time and if you just happen to run into her in certain places.

And lol on the booger. Comeon, man ...

For me, if a woman lights up around me - grins at most things I says - tells me she wants to hug me all the time or be around me all the time, I know she's feelin' me.

Another thing that attracts women? C-O-M-M-I-T-M-E-N-T. Yeah, ladies see a dude with a wedding band, they are like 'Dude is willing to settle down.' They will play extra hard because they  *think* you won't try anything. If you are caught slippin', it is easy to fall. Fortunately, I have never gotten to that point - but doggone.

Any update, hitman? Whassup, playboy?

 

Yeah, we were saying the same thing really... I was just just saying, the direct approach didn't work, and some other people were telling him to go do it again.  If the poor guy tried that again, he'd go from fool to a guy who's seemingly desperate.

He needs to back pff.  If she starts taking notice of him, stares, etc, then he might still have a chance.  Otherwise, she just isn't interested.  He doesn't need to show her the "I like you" signs, as she well knows that he wants to go out with her.  It's no secret.

As for the wedding band thing, yeah that is true.  My wife told me that women also like to have things that belong to someone else... you know, some people just gotta have what's already taken. 

She also said that women are always checking out another guy's girl.  If an ugly dude is with a gorgeous girl, they want him because the guy must be rich or got something special going on below the waste.  If the dude is the gorgeous one with the ugly chick, they say, "damn, I'm hotter than her, I can have him.  She don't deserve a guy that good looking".

So my wife says.  But sounds about right to me.

 



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madskillz on 12 December 2008
Angel_DwK said:
@Madskillz...

Yo I understand that your bound to find a girl where a direct approach works which is why in my post I said this works most of the time..


the fact is nothing happened with you and that girl and she approached you.. did you even get a number... a name... hell even a hug?


from the sound of it no... now I was under the impression that guys want to get with a chick... not make them cry and run away....

Dude, why did I need a number? Had I wanted to go further, the door was wide open. I was trying to prove a point. I have used the direct approach on complete strangers - and it's all about reading and understanding the terrain. If you are in the dating realm and single - and can't adapt to different situations, you are bound to miss numerous opportunities.

In the end, what are you trying to accomplish? Finding one person who will be your soulmate - your dog for life. Your woman. Hugs? I get them now from women - and men. I hug errbody. Even women that don't hug dudes hug me. Why? I'm not a threat. I understand women and they look at me and say 'He hugs everybody.'

But yeah man, hugs and numbers? I'm married and I get that. I never ask for numbers - and women volunteer it - or tell me to text them. Haha. That's nada to write home about. Getting a woman who rejected you - and vowed to never be with you EVER again to roll wit? That's game, son.

That's the premise I am coming from.

 



madskillz on 12 December 2008
Comrade Tovya said:
madskillz said:
Comrade Tovya said:
I don't know about the compliment thing now, because he already kind of showed his cards.

I'd change my name, quit my job, and leave the country.. ;)

No seriously though, the direct approach rarely works unless she's been giving you the signs... playing with her hair when you look at her, you catch her taking multiple glances at you (unless there is a big booger hanging out your nose, and that could be why she's staring, so check that first).

I think the smile she gives you is the big clue (if she gives you one of course).

Not really - you can rebound from that faux pas by just being yourself. She just had her defenses up - but give her some time and if you just happen to run into her in certain places.

And lol on the booger. Comeon, man ...

For me, if a woman lights up around me - grins at most things I says - tells me she wants to hug me all the time or be around me all the time, I know she's feelin' me.

Another thing that attracts women? C-O-M-M-I-T-M-E-N-T. Yeah, ladies see a dude with a wedding band, they are like 'Dude is willing to settle down.' They will play extra hard because they  *think* you won't try anything. If you are caught slippin', it is easy to fall. Fortunately, I have never gotten to that point - but doggone.

Any update, hitman? Whassup, playboy?

 

Yeah, we were saying the same thing really... I was just just saying, the direct approach didn't work, and some other people were telling him to go do it again.  If the poor guy tried that again, he'd go from fool to a guy who's seemingly desperate.

He needs to back pff.  If she starts taking notice of him, stares, etc, then he might still have a chance.  Otherwise, she just isn't interested.  He doesn't need to show her the "I like you" signs, as she well knows that he wants to go out with her.  It's no secret.

As for the wedding band thing, yeah that is true.  My wife told me that women also like to have things that belong to someone else... you know, some people just gotta have what's already taken. 

She also said that women are always checking out another guy's girl.  If an ugly dude is with a gorgeous girl, they want him because the guy must be rich or got something special going on below the waste.  If the dude is the gorgeous one with the ugly chick, they say, "damn, I'm hotter than her, I can have him.  She don't deserve a guy that good looking".

So my wife says.  But sounds about right to me.

 

True dis, bro ... but I am living proof that women who aren't remotely interested can turn to you - but it takes time. It's the law of attraction - the more you are around a person, the more you are attracted to them. For her, all it may take is like those crazy Liberty Mutual commercials. She could be at her desk and he's walking by and helps someone - not even trying to flex his game - and she's like 'That's really nice' and gives him another chance - even initiates. It happens - like a light just goes off.

Yeah, the wedding band thing is sooooo true. If you look anything like your sig, I can bet you have women checking you out and seeing the band on your finger and feenin'. I don't wear my band as much - especially when I work with electronics - but in Texas, I don't flirt as hard as I did in New Mexico. Dang, mix brown skin and charisma and I could have an army of hawties - soldiers - down to help a brotha out.

I have seen your other posts - seems like we share a lot in common as far as game. You in Texas, right? I'm in H-town.

 



lemieux-rules66 on 12 December 2008

Good job. I have been rejected four times in the past few months. Use this as a way to gain experience :D



Flow on 12 December 2008
madskillz said:
Flow said:
madskillz said:
Flow said:
Oh, you shy people got a serious problem...

You know you have to "lose the shyness and go and talk to a girl".

I'll use a nice metaphor here, it's like you live in the jungle and there's a freaking big and evil tiger surrounding you and threatening to kill you in you little cave at any moment.

But you fear this tiger, yes! And by fearing the tiger i mean being shy to talk to a woman, fearing rejection.

But you know you've got to lose this fear... and what do you do?

This is the point where most of you think you've got to grab a random boulder and jump in this tiger like you have a S on your chest just because you've lost your fear. And damn, that's wrong. You may probably kill the tiger, but you will be hanging for your life. And probably the tiger will eat you alive.

What you gotta do is craft your weapons, study the tiger, train your fighting skills, and then face the tiger when you know what you are doing.

So, be aware that the direct approach (talking about women now, but that also apply on tigers and most big animals) will probably let you down. You need to make the female like you first, get friendly and intimate with her, tease her, and when you know you're there, go for that mouth, you'll know when she wants it.

THIS is what you need to stop fearing to do. Now drop that damn boulder

Dude, wouldn't that approach like kill your prey? I would rather lay down and get busy than killing stuff. That's just bloody and nasty. Gimme good lovin', FTW.

 

 

Do you know why i compared the woman to a tiger? It's not because the woman is actually a threat.

It's because platonically loving a woman kills you inside. Doing nothing about this love kills you inside, you need to know if you have a chance with her and go for it or that it's going nowhere and move on and forget her, or else the pain can be unbearable.

 

Love is irrational, yes. But you need to be rational when going to talk to the girl, try to get her to like you instead of "hey you're hot let's get busy?" or something, like the OP did.

And this is what i was trying to explain with a nice, simple and bloody metaphor to help the OP stop suffering. Of course, maybe it's not love that he is feeling.

ROTFLMBO - didn't you have a prob with a girl in a thread about love - and within a week or two, you have mad advice? Look, all I can do is tell about my success and failures - and what works for most guys I know. I don't know you - and from the post about you stalking your prey and everything sounds like you drew bow in a deer hunt. It's not a game, kid - it's life. You can look at a women as prey (ok, women in a pack count) and maybe it works for you - but cats I've seen try that end up complaining they don't get out much. Just sayin'.

Oh yeah - I remember our views of love are different - and pretty much completely opposite. Infatuation will leave you dazed, confused and believing you got hit by an 18-wheeler. Love - for most of my running buddies - is thinking things out and leaving irrational behaviour in the dust.

I was being sarcastic as far as that - but back in the day when I was a heathen, I got some action by acting just like that.

You can pretty much look at a babe and talk to her for a minute or two and see where her head's at. I haven't been shot down in nearly 10 years.

 

Yes, that was me. Thing is i knew what my problem was and that i had a problem, i just was too weak or too in love to deal with it. Now here i am trying to help this fella stay away from where i was. Just because i played with a tiger metaphor doesn't mean i see women as prey, and i don't see it as a game, but in that post i just said what everybody else said, but i guess it's criminal to use metaphors now. Maybe i went too far with the "love is suffering" thing, but like you said, "all I can do is tell about my success and failures - and what works for most guys I know.", and my failure was not being strong enough to do what works. And as i said, the advice i gave him is just what everybody else posted, just behind a tiger metaphor i did joking, that made me look like a women-stalker now, i guess >.>




Flow -"The important is to pwn other ppl"

Dgc1808 on 12 December 2008

You manned up and tried

+2049 for you

Try again, try a different approach. And perhaps you mite want to go back to the girl you mentioned in the op and... mmm... perhaps talk or apologize or something.



4 ≈ One