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What's the point in having children?

Forums - General Discussion - What's the point in having children?

CladInShadows said:
SvennoJ said:

The experts, yeah. We call them the breast feeding police. First time one of them breast feed warriors came to the house lecturing us on the benefits. That made my wife feel very guilty pushing through worsening Mastitis in both breasts until she couldn't anymore. A miserable mother in pain every time the baby tries to latch on is no good either. Plus he was losing weight, so that settled that.
http://www.bbc.com/future/story/20170503-are-there-downsides-to-breast-is-best

A happy mother is a happy baby, works both ways.


Breast feeding is a contentious subject.  My wife felt the pressures of that as well.  She simply does not produce much in the way of milk, though.  So she quickly said fuck that, and we've been on bottle pretty much since the beginning.

Good decision. The horror of pumping for an hour for a little bit of milk, then being so tired and sore from the stitches (c-section) to spill it all on the way to the fridge... That was not a good time. One of the draw backs in having children 'late' in life. We were in out thirties when the first was born.



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To pay for my retirement. Without a generation to follow us, we will literally be working till we die.



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SvennoJ said:
CladInShadows said:

So would you recommend chiro?  I'm always a little hesitant.

Of course my chiropractor recommends it lol. It helps me tremendously and it seemed to help him as well. We were going weekly, actually he was going twice a week. We were on a family plan and my wife took him on Monday to both get adjusted and I took him on Thursday's.
https://www.livingandloving.co.za/baby-blog/6-chiropractic-benefits-babies
It helps with colic, which he was struggling with.

Yeah, I was specifically referring to the baby.  The wife has mentioned chiro, but I'm very hesitant.  I have had first hand experience with chiro as an adult, and while I think it works well for back pain and issues, I also know that chiropractors tend to think it cures everything.  And I'm very skeptical of alternative medicine, of which chiro does straddle the line a bit. And given the fragility of my daughter (both were preemies, and my daughter was the reason they came out as early as they did, at 3 pounds, 4 ounces), I'm naturally skeptical of this.

Last edited by CladInShadows - on 27 December 2018

Imagine in your old age you are screwed with syncope, lighheadedness, fatigue and you wished someone helped you out if not for siblings or partner who is no more....the very thought of being alone can wreak havoc upon one's stability to the core. Either having them under commune or family might mean something. I have always been thinking of this being single yet and trying to outwit hormones hijacking intelligence.



SvennoJ said:
CladInShadows said:

Breast feeding is a contentious subject.  My wife felt the pressures of that as well.  She simply does not produce much in the way of milk, though.  So she quickly said fuck that, and we've been on bottle pretty much since the beginning.

Good decision. The horror of pumping for an hour for a little bit of milk, then being so tired and sore from the stitches (c-section) to spill it all on the way to the fridge... That was not a good time. One of the draw backs in having children 'late' in life. We were in out thirties when the first was born.

Same.  We had a hell of a time conceiving, and as a result, we're also in our late 30s.  This was kind of our final attempt before considering adoption.  But luckily, our first round of IUI fertility treatment was successful.  Doubly so.

So the wife had a c-section, the babies were born 6 weeks early, and other things that can come from having your first pregnancy so late in life.  Totally worth it though when I look down at two healthy little creatures.



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CladInShadows said:
SvennoJ said:

Of course my chiropractor recommends it lol. It helps me tremendously and it seemed to help him as well. We were going weekly, actually he was going twice a week. We were on a family plan and my wife took him on Monday to both get adjusted and I took him on Thursday's.
https://www.livingandloving.co.za/baby-blog/6-chiropractic-benefits-babies
It helps with colic, which he was struggling with.

Yeah, I was specifically referring to the baby.  The wife has mentioned chiro, but I'm very hesitant.  I have had first hand experience with chiro as an adult, and while I think it works well for back pain and issues, I also know that chiropractors tend to think it cures everything.  And I'm very skeptical of alternative medicine, of which chiro does straddle the line a bit. And given the fragility of my daughter (both were preemies, and my daughter was the reason they came out as early as they did, at 3 pounds, 4 ounces), I'm naturally skeptical of this.

They might embellish it a tad, yet out of personal experience it does more than cure back pain. For one it really stimulates the digestive system as I always have great bowel movements after the chiropractor lol. It did calm our baby down a lot. It's not a miracle cure, but it does help. However it helps as a regular thing, so it can be quite expensive, and it did not cure the acid reflux.

My chiropractor does go pretty far with the no need for pain meds and natural health products. I rather take Advil than drink some expensive tea hoping it will dull the pain a bit.



SvennoJ said:

One of the draw backs in having children 'late' in life. We were in out thirties when the first was born.

I'm 38 and the wife is 39, and we're on our first (likely only) child.

I had a friend several years ago that had her first child at 40.  She specifically told me not to wait that long, as it's a lot harder to handle all the stuff that goes along with a kid when you're older.  Clearly, I didn't listen, and I'll have to learn the hard way.  



VAMatt said:
SvennoJ said:

One of the draw backs in having children 'late' in life. We were in out thirties when the first was born.

I'm 38 and the wife is 39, and we're on our first (likely only) child.

I had a friend several years ago that had her first child at 40.  She specifically told me not to wait that long, as it's a lot harder to handle all the stuff that goes along with a kid when you're older.  Clearly, I didn't listen, and I'll have to learn the hard way.  

That, and you'll be 60 by the time they move out, if you're lucky lol. Hopefully my kids don't wait that long so we can still enjoy grand children. Time for us to pressure our children into having kids! Atm it's all that newfangled school math that's stumping us. Math was very different when we were kids.



SvennoJ said:

 Atm it's all that newfangled school math that's stumping us. Math was very different when we were kids.

Side note - that newfangled math is exactly the way I've always done it in my head.  I had problems in school often because I did math in my head, and couldn't write it out and show my work the way the teachers wanted.  Now, they switched it to exactly the same way I wasn't allowed to do it when I was in school.  

With that said, I do not think that the new style is better than the old ways.  It happened to work well for me because I did it in my head.  But, it seems unnecessarily difficult to write it out the new way.  I guess most math is real life is done in one's head though.....



VAMatt said:
SvennoJ said:

 Atm it's all that newfangled school math that's stumping us. Math was very different when we were kids.

Side note - that newfangled math is exactly the way I've always done it in my head.  I had problems in school often because I did math in my head, and couldn't write it out and show my work the way the teachers wanted.  Now, they switched it to exactly the same way I wasn't allowed to do it when I was in school.  

With that said, I do not think that the new style is better than the old ways.  It happened to work well for me because I did it in my head.  But, it seems unnecessarily difficult to write it out the new way.  I guess most math is real life is done in one's head though.....

That's true, it's a lot like making change.

What math do you actually use in real life:
- Making change is going away, tap to pay, pay by phone, who uses cash anymore. I do for coffee, that's about it.
- Calculating tax and tips in your head, very useful!
- Unit conversions, living in a country that uses all units it's pretty necessary.
- Square meters / square footage for home improvement stuff.
- Diagonal dimensions to width / height for 16:9 displays, always need that!
- Time estimates to get somewhere, although google maps will tell you.
That's about it.

I did finally use algebra when playing Elite Dangerous. Fun to calculate at which velocity I should engage the engines to stop in time, given a certain starting height, max engine thrust and known g factor of the planet below. Then trust my 200 million credits ship on my math, start free fall and stop 10 meters above the surface. Adrenaline rush lol.