Red Steel 3

It seems too fishy.

That list couldn't be more full of crap.  A timed exclusive of Madden?  There's no fucking way.  Unless it was for, like, three days, since August is always Madden month, and Madden month it shall stay.

Mass Effect 3 is a no way in hell.  Especially with Mass Effect 1, which Microsoft has at least partial rights to.

Every title with "cafe" in the title is moronic, since "Cafe" is the damned codename of the system.

There won't be anything from Epic since Nintendo fans would never buy Epic games anyway, and Epic has no interest in Nintendo.

Grand Theft Auto V isn't going to happen because GTA, and GTA-style games don't sell on Nintendo systems because, you know, they don't have Mario in them.

Absolutely nothing up there that says "timed exclusive" is going to happen.  If BioShock Infinite is a timed exclusive anywhere, it'll be on the Xbox 360.

Dead Space and Red Steel III will never happen because Nintendo fans went ahead and ignored those franchises to make sure they'd stay as absent as possible in Nintendo's future.  Probably because they don't have Mario in them.

It will not launch with a Zelda game, unless Nintendo gets desperate and pulls a "Twilight Princess" with "Skyward Sword."

And finally, there are too few Mario-themed games present in that list.  There should be at least half a dozen, and most of them should sound as crappy as they're likely to be.  At least one more Paper Mario, another Mario Kart, and one or two dreadful Mario sports-themed games, and probably another pointless Mario Party.

The launch list should also include no fewer than 4 or 5 game from Ubi-Soft.  All but one of which would be almost guaranteed to be crap.  You know, like they did on the Wii and 3DS.

What's really surprising is that the retard that slapped together this list of lies didn't attempt to put Smash Bros in there.  

This is the second time in a thread I strongly agree with you. That is either frightening and/or interesting.

I have my moments.

I was sure someone would bring the torches and pitchforks to me for "ripping on Mario" in there (it might still happen), but I'm so sick of Nintendo over-using the character, like they're desperate for sales and afraid to try anything new or different.  

Nintendo:  "Let's make a sports game!"

Nintendo dev:  "Okay!"  

Nintendo:  "Hey, let's make it with Mario!"

Nintendo dev:  "For some reason, we agree that's a good idea!"  

Constantly being bombarded with Tony Hawk, Sonic, and Guitar Hero certainly didn't help those franchises.  I'd really rather not see a childhood icon turned into the next latter-day Sonic.

MGS Rising?KH cafe?Rockstar new ip cafe?square enix nw ip cafe?...yeah cmon...who believe this list is real now?

I don't mind some of them, but after looking at how they haven't made a proper new Kirby game since I don't know, it seems they have this habit of taking characers and slapping them on any game just to try to coast on the character's name. Now Mario is established in sports games, so I can take that (and STILL think a Koopa shell surfing game SHOULD be made), but the series still sells best as a "Run to the goal" platformer, and that is what Nintendo keeps neglecting.

So I agree with you on this, just in differing ways.

I absolutely love Kirby's Epic Yarn (and find it humorous that it lies, alphabetically, between Manhunt 2, MadWorld, House of the Dead 2&3 and Overkill on my shelf), but it is exactly what you said:  A game Nintendo slapped a character into to coast on the name.  Kirby fit well into that game, but it was originally just starring that Prince Puff guy.  

I'm huge on Mario platformers, loved the classic SNES Mario RPG, but have turned against Mario Kart (a game series I have marked as my nemesis due to it's unique ability to drive me to extreme anger at record speed), have no interest in Mario sports games, and have simply stopped caring about Paper Mario.  Nintendo used to make a huge variety of games without needing to cram Mario into them, and when they did make a new Mario game--it was cause for celebration.  Granted, Ken Griffey Jr retired last year, but they could still make their own "regular" baseball game.  

I feel like they're freely neglecting any number of franchises just to keep making stuff themed around Mario.  Where were F-Zero or StarFox on the Wii?  I thought a motion-controlled Arwing would be cool.  

The system was severly lacking in FPS titles, and yet no upgraded sequel to Geist.  It's beating a dead horse to talk about how Nintendo once "ushered in the era of the console FPS" in no small part to Goldeneye and the Turok games being N64 exclusives--only to wonder how they abandoned a genre for no good reason since then.  

I get this idea that Nintendo seems to be turning into Sega--you know, getting unnecessarily lazy in their game development and design philosophy.  Except that Sega didn't get lazy until they no longer had consoles depending on their games being good.  In a sense, even Mario Galaxy 2 was lazy--look closely--it's the first Mario sequel since the Japanese Super Mario 2 (our western "Lost Levels," of course) that was built on the same engine as its predecessor.  

Sure, it was good, but where's the dramatic leap like we had with Super Mario Bros 3 or Mario World?

To be fair, a Koopa shell surfing game would probably work.  But I'd really rather not see it happen until they can give Mario a little break--and let some of their other franchises (and some new ones) a chance to shine in the spotlight.  

GTA: Chinatown Wars (DS Version) - 1.19 million units sold

GTA: Chinatown Wars (PSP Version) - 0.81 million units sold

Nintendo console wins!

I assume these are VGChartz numbers, with a plus/minus 10 rate of accuracy, and with the PSN sales of Chinatown Wars PSP missing?

Anyway. OT.

Fakest list ever.