Which achievements/trophies you've come across in gaming are the silliest, stupidest, most ill-conceived?

I think I got an achievement on a steam game for starting the game which on steam can be considered an achievement.

The one where any game gives me an achievement. As if I need to be told I achieved something. I know who I am.

Probably any game that gives you an achievement just for starting it up.

Also certain games with minimal movement where you can just rack up a lot of trophies quickly with almost no effort.

Trophy for 92 online victories in GT Sport.

I hold this one responsible for the atrocious online behavior as a result. So many people manipulate the ratings and penalty system to get matched with lower ranked players so they can farm 'easy' wins. The problem is, they never stop after reaching the trophy, ruining the game for any new comers, or rather showing them that win at all cost, ram people out of the way, is what GT Sport is all about.

There is no trophy for clean driving, sportmanship or holding a good record.

I got an achievement for not playing the pirated version of a game...

Usually the first one, "yay you jumped"

Blue Dragon's collect all items achievement.

Mistwalker programmed the Steal command like an idiot would, allowing to steal only one item from enemies that carry multiple ones, then proceeded to put the bulk of endgame gear as rare steals from late game bosses. So yes, I played the game with an item checklist next to me and spent 30 minutes on average reloading my file at each boss trying to get their unique gear.

I didn't know about the achievement beforehand because I don't care about them, I just wanted the items and when the notification popped up it was more infuriating than anything else.

No wonder why Mistwalker makes mobile games nowadays.

When it comes to terrible achievements (and terrible DLC), I always mention Magna Carta 2.

You couldn't get 100% Achievements without the PAID DLC and, to get the Achievements, you have to watch these absolutely terrible cuts cutscenes. I couldn't finish them. I skipped them and still got the Achievements.

I forget the specifics, but didn't Killzone 2 have a trophy where you had to be in the top 1% of players in online multiplayer or something like that? That's kinda cruel to completionists.