My birthday gift was a pepperoni pizza.
I enjoyed it greatly.
Well...let me sit you guys down to tell you my sob story. I once had no money, no house, no nothing. Broke, no food, and I didn't own anything.
It got to be a little too much and I had to face facts and give up my pride and realize I was 5 and lived with my parents. Couldn't do a damn thing and get no job. *begins sobbing uncontrollably*
He was just a boy dammit! Why'd you have to do him like that!?
Lube Me Up
Once, back in like 95-2000, I was so broke that I wrote a check for a sandwich at a local diner. When I got home and I was unlocking the door to my parent's house, I dropped the box and the sandwich fell out.
I still ate that club sandwich.
And the check bounced! My bank kept running the check and it was costing me $30 every time. After like the 3rd time, I went to the bank and paid to have the check cancelled. I think it was another $30. Little did I know, after the third time, they just return the check and the business can issue a warrant for your arrest. The business sent me a letter saying I had to pay like $60-$80 or something. At the time, I was making like $200 a week.
So yeah, that was probably my darkest hour.
Twitter: @d21lewis
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