I'm a female user. ;o)
rutea7 said:
i cant believe i come back from an awesome girl time at a bachelorette party to find so many pages of... whatever it is i just read. if you say something and the other person takes offense you take responsability for it whether it was your intention to offend or not... some women will take offense more easily than others and they should still be respected and not criticized because of it. i just laugh off most of the stupid and sexist stuff i read here, thats how i'm still here, but i do not condone or believe that this is an ideal or inviting environment for female posters and that they should "learn to roll with it" that is just ridiculous |
ya'll abused me. kept calling me namers like nanners and kept making banana jokes. i have feelings you know.
but in all seriousness, i do agree, intent shouldnt be the only factor, its the effect of the post that matters as well. i said it before to descrive VGC and i will say it again, VGC is a boys club. the way guys speak and behave is so much similar to a boys club, infact, just looking at the comments in here proves it, a lot of people were surprised at females being present here, and when females arent present we all know how guys act, disgusting.
bananaking21 said:
but in all seriousness, i do agree, intent shouldnt be the only factor, its the effect of the post that matters as well. i said it before to descrive VGC and i will say it again, VGC is a boys club. the way guys speak and behave is so much similar to a boys club, infact, just looking at the comments in here proves it, a lot of people were surprised at females being present here, and when females arent present we all know how guys act, disgusting. |
exactly, guys here always behave like there's no members of the oposite sex present and by assuming that they'll alienate those members.
it's like if girls are in a girls only group things will be said that wouldnt normally be said in the presence of guys. but girls are usually more aware of male presence and wont alienate male members, the oposite cant be said, especially when they are clearly the majority.
I'm female, however, I am just a quiet person on sites for the most part. I only speak up when something tickles my fancy or when something is said that I should probably speak up on.
I should probably be more vocal, but meh. :P
rutea7 said: exactly, guys here always behave like there's no members of the oposite sex present and by assuming that they'll alienate those members. it's like if girls are in a girls only group things will be said that wouldnt normally be said in the presence of guys. but girls are usually more aware of male presence and wont alienate male members, the oposite cant be said, especially when they are clearly the majority. |
sadly, i think its an issue that cant be solved. or solved very hard.
people would be more aware of females on the forum if under your avatar each member would have a "female" or "male", showing the gender of the poster. that way people would notice it in threads, and feel the precense of females more, even if its just a little bit.
@bolded: its not just about what is said, its about how guys behave as well, their tone in posting the messages they post and how they joke around and go around the forums.
rutea7 said:
i cant believe i come back from an awesome girl time at a bachelorette party to find so many pages of... whatever it is i just read. if you say something and the other person takes offense you take responsability for it whether it was your intention to offend or not... some women will take offense more easily than others and they should still be respected and not criticized because of it. i just laugh off most of the stupid and sexist stuff i read here, thats how i'm still here, but i do not condone or believe that this is an ideal or inviting environment for female posters and that they should "learn to roll with it" that is just ridiculous |
If you intended to offend someone and the other person takes offense, you take responsibility for it.
If you say something that was not intended to offend and the other person takes offence, it's a misunderstanding, and it's the responsibility of both parties to figure that out and move on. 'Taking offence' is often an unfairly used weapon that gets the innocent and naive into trouble.
I agree that some women will take offence more easily than others and they should still be respected and not criticised because of it. But this applies to anyone, not just women.
Regarding this site, I agree, it's not the most ideal or inviting environment for female posters, but it is what it is, and anyone who doesn't like the look of it has the choice not to register.
I roll my eyes at a lot of the male banter here, and maybe I shut them too when the testosterone levels get too high. That's the demographic that's likely to arise since the gaming industry is geared towards male gamers. Trying to cure the symptoms by attempting to change the culture of a single gaming website is not going to address the root cause.
Yes, the line probably does get crossed here, sometimes, and I would hope the moderators do their best to deal with those instances fairly and reasonably. As a female member with the bigger picture in mind, the positive things on this site far outweigh anything sexually offensive I've seen.
Hedra42 said:
If you intended to offend someone and the other person takes offense, you take responsibility for it. If you say something that was not intended to offend and the other person takes offence, it's a misunderstanding, and it's the responsibility of both parties to figure that out and move on. 'Taking offence' is often an unfairly used weapon that gets the innocent and naive into trouble. I agree that some women will take offence more easily than others and they should still be respected and not criticised because of it. But this applies to anyone, not just women. Regarding this site, I agree, it's not the most ideal or inviting environment for female posters, but it is what it is, and anyone who doesn't like the look of it has the choice not to register. I roll my eyes at a lot of the male banter here, and maybe I shut them too when the testosterone levels get too high, because that's the demographic that's likely to arise since the gaming industry is geared towards male gamers. Trying to cure the symptoms by attempting to change the culture of a single gaming website is not going to address the root cause. Yes, the line probably does get crossed here, sometimes, and I would hope the moderators do their best to deal with those instances fairly and reasonably. As a female member with the bigger picture in mind, the positive things on this site far outweigh anything sexually offensive I've seen. |
as for the bolded part the offended party is completely entitled to express that it felt offended by whatever comment transpired, if the offensor (willing or not) takes up a posture of "thats not my problem you deal with it" it's hardly an atitude that should be ignored in a forum with so much activity and members.
the underlined bit is hardly a solution for a big community like this one, issues come up and they should all be adressed accordingly.
i dont care if you are a female member, i'm one since '09 and saw many come and go for many reasons that didnt turn me away but improving the community spirit in a forum with this amount of activity is important. and being a female member i dont think that bending over and taking certain types of comments is a propper representation of the way a female should behave and the image we pass of female gamers to the rest of our community. it will only encourage more inapropriate behaviour
Mr.Playstation said: While checking out the hot topics section, I by mistake clicked on the last post header and so instead of showing me the most recent posts it showed the oldest posts on this site dating bak too 06. After seeing these posts and clicking on a few profiles of people who had posted back then I learned that there had been a couple of females who had on their profiles listed to being female something which is non existant now. Could someone please explain this and also why most users back then except for ioi are no longer active. P.S: I am just trying to learn more about the site since I am relativly new. So stop thinking what you are thinking. |
Because less than 10% of ALL console gamers are girls? I'd wager 9% of those aren't online either which explains why they are so hard to find. Gamer girls, at least the ones who are as passionate about the industry as us, are just way too small in number to ever find a large amount online.
rutea7 said:
the underlined bit is hardly a solution for a big community like this one, issues come up and they should all be adressed accordingly. i dont care if you are a female member, i'm one since '09 and saw many come and go for many reasons that didnt turn me away but improving the community spirit in a forum with this amount of activity is important. and being a female member i dont think that bending over and taking certain types of comments is a propper representation of the way a female should behave and the image we pass of female gamers to the rest of our community. it will only encourage more inapropriate behaviour |
If the offensor takes up a posture of "that's not my problem you deal with it", then they're intending to offend, and are continuing to do so. If it's "that wasn't what I was implying", then it is a misunderstanding that needs to be resolved by both parties.
Underlined - the community is certainly thriving well enough without the people who don't want to register, and of course, as I stated in my previous post, I would hope that the moderators deal with issues fairly and reasonably.
I can't speak for people who've come and gone in the past, or how the forum was moderated in the past, but I do not believe that taking the wider view that I do is 'bending over and taking certain types of comments'. I don't think I pass off a bad image of a female gamer, and I have never attracted any inappropriate behaviour from other members.