clearly he has been feeling that you didn't gave him the attention he needed so he lashed out by flirting with other people.. never take your loved ones for granted

I am not necessarily the best person to give advice since I am "chasing" after a girl that clearly does not care for me but my love for her compels me to do so; however, I will tell you that this guy is playing games with you and you should be aware of that.  Regardless of the decision that you make, you need to know the facts so that you can make the most informed decision possible.  My suggestion would be to move on but if your feelings will not allow you to do so then at least know the situation that you are in.  If you stay, this most likely will end badly with only you being hurt.  When a man truly loves his woman, it would take an act of the Goddess for him to acknowledge another woman.  Do what you have to do mama but take care.

sorry hun but it sounds like this guy could be trying to play you. Did he confess all of this AFTER you catch him?

Yeah he told me after I found out. He cried and said I love you that I'm perfect for him and that he doesn't know why he did it etc. thanks for the advice btw people. Having moved to Southampton (to be with this guy) I haven't made too many real friends here yet so I'm kinda venting tto anyone who'll listen. I have asked him several times why he's done it what could I change about myself etc but he says it's a mystery. He also said he was going to delete the app that night (not sure I believe that). He said it was just a fantasy that he didn't want it to go anything physical but again I'm not sure what to think.

as humans we aren't supposed to just be with one person, imo.. we aren't monogomous creatures.. BUT, it's confusing.. there is a reason why he was on that application and talking to guys like that.. it's fact THERE IS A REASON, and he choose to do it for a reason.. there is no mystery, he's just being a bitch by not telling u..

what application was he on?

Grindr!! So classy

My ex girlfriend did something similar, so maybe my story can relate to you.

I knew I shouldn't have forgiven her, but she told me she didn't know what she was doing and that she really only wanted to be with me. Against my better judgement, I forgave her, and we continued dating. Things were never the same after that, though. It was always in the back of my head every day: "If she loves me as much as she says she does... why would she even do that? Why? Does she just not think of my feelings?" and it tormented me inside. At times she would notice this and she would get super upset and sad that she felt I wasn't over it. She accused me of not being able to trust her, and she was right, I couldn't. Things only went downhill from there and just a few months later our relationship was really on rocks and we rather violently (in a verbal sense) broke up.

Looking back on it now, I'm glad we're not together anymore. I could never be with someone who had such blatant disregard for my feelings and who apparently didn't love me enough to stay true to me.

You shouldn't be with him.

About a year later, I found an amazing girl and we've been together for over a year now. The amazing thing is that we haven't once ever gotten in a fight. I started realizing how my ex girlfriend used to get so jealous and upset at least once every two weeks, and looking back on it I see how emotionally abusive she was in our relationship. My current girlfriend is an angel comparatively and we have a brilliant relationship.

I'd encourage it! my girlfriend regularly shares naked pictures of herself online, and it's awesome. She had an Xtube account, and we used to share videos of us together. Well, let's say you get a lot of pervs suggesting they do naughty things to her.

It's just a fact of sharing porn, people are gonna do that.

Luckily we were openminded about the whole thing and we have an open relationship, so we can share each other freely. You should try it, once you go open, jealousy, infidelity, and lack of trust go out the window. it's liberating.

Depends on how well you really know him