We are just as confused about women. Really, I don't think woman will even make the first move, and some guys are just like.. "Err are you flirting or just being nice?", women are just like, from another planet from us haha. I don't think it's once in the lifetime, especially at our age, both mine and OP's, we are relatively the same age, I don't think that this is the final love we'll ever have haha. It's just during these years it seems like the most important of things.

At least we aren't the only confused ones :P

Pretty sure its not a once in a lifetime thing...but thats not to say that everybody is even going to feel that once in their lives...I haven't yet :(

Thankfully I'm still young :D

Its possible to experience it two times or more, I know that from my own past. Thing is; the feelings grow and mutate when they (the girls) become or already are, unavailable for any reason and one starts to obsess.

However, like I mentioned above, recognizing and dealing with these things get easier as you age and learn a thing or two about both yourself and the opposite sex. What makes these things twice as hard at times is that the person you are in love with seem so nice, it'd be much simpler if they were utter cunts and you could hate them... However, we also tend to place people on a pedestal and attribute the target of our affection a lot of traits they don't actually have and overlook flaws and faults for the sake of maintaining the image of being perfect (OP even describes her as perfect). The girl in question is not unlike dozens and dozens of girls I've known and know in my life, being attracted to "bad boys" is ultimately a sign of immaturity and insecurity and is in essence self destructive behavior. The only reason these boys are "bad" to begin with is that there are girls like her that they can take advantage of. Mind you, his type is not an Alpha Male as many would consider him, aggression, lack of empathy and communicative skills and charisma and complete disregard for consequences for oneself and others are not the signs of an Alpha Male demeanor and behavior pattern at all. "Bad Boys" are beta males with issues and are inherently bad for the basis of any romantic relationship and many times even social ones.

Dude you're like me. But older. And probably grumpier. That is exactly my plan, stop stealing my thoughts damn you!

in my experience (damn that makes me feel old) yes we can and we will... the young ones are confused with all the hormones and listining to emo music so they might not agree.. but there is another side to this story.. cause of this there will always be that "other" girl.. the "What if" girl.. the one you had the same feelings for like your current love.. don't be jealous of her.. don't be mean to her.. don't hate me for talking to her.. cause in the end we remember why we broke up in the past and why I'm with you...

Ahh triplets on the forums lol, it's fate, I think we're all from different countries too, probably even continents!

right. so see if the OP was to go on and find love right, and the girl stumbled across this thread one day.. the OP didnt break up with the first girl, he never got with her in the first place. which means he would be with her if he could be. which means the feelings might never be replicated and any subsequent relationship may, theoretically, never be that good?

sorry if im being difficult.

man reading this thread i kinda feel sad now...sorry if i came of as an asshole earlier....i can very much relate so some of the stories told in this thread

Nehuh.. don't be negative!  girls and their doubting... the new love is better... cause it's current.. in the OP's case he will have found a girl who has the same feelings for him as he has for her.. which the first one wouldn't answer... my gf knows my what if girl.. and sure she was scared I would still have feelings for her.. which I have.. but that love turned into care..  she understand that she was an important part of my life in my past.. now she's just a part in my life.. and my current gf is the more important part of my life... the love feelings for my what if girl turned into caring.. and a new love feeling came with my current gf.. better? worse? I don't know.. cause the love feeling didn't occur on the same time... so I don't care and can't and won't compare them..

we all have baggage in our lives... some more then others.. unless it's trying to kill you.. we'll be fine..

Are you referring to the common case where the baggage hates you so much that they come at you with an icicle and try stabbing you?