[NMS] Angry Joe reviews No Man's Sky

Transcript from Youtube:

0:05

LT to charge to pay technology reach

0:18

bicycle power

0:25

flash is critical

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technology we chat

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flexible talent

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icicle critical reach now he hated technology reach a treehome out sir you

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don't fuck it up

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I love space games it's been so long since I've been excited for 11 that

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specifically caters to an aspect often discarded and ignored the love of

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exploration no man's sky has its focus there instead of just pure combat I was

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so looking forward to exploring the Stars meeting new life categorizing them

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in discovering interesting things along my journey to boldly go where no Joe has

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gone before their little guy got some iron for you

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oh yeah yeah you're happy now yeah and to be perfectly honest you can do that

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and it doesn't well at first

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in fact when we began i was impressed

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Oh fucking time I discovered it it's in the sorry David maybe it's a horny t-rex

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has the horny dear X well the game doesn't have the most detailed graphics

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or textures the color palette and unique fauna of the planets excited me the

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bright colors the stylized look it was all the joy to behold turn my god I'm

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prison

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it's a farm ok that's the first time I've seen a storm that's cool

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it is 19 degrees Celsius during the first eight to ten hours it was like a

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childhood dream come true

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I may have gotten really lucky with my starting good planet it had interesting

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creatures massive k's beautiful locations lots of useful resources and I

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dubbed it my first planet Sigourney Weaver

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and endeavour to discover that all she had to offer with the games discovery

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and catalog system my first taste of danger was encountering an aggressive

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species they look like crabs which we dub space herpes fuck up letting I my

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god I was so proud to have discovered it and at the same time terrified of

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fighting those creepy crawlies a bridge

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ya lookin at yo

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oh shit I did do that he started it

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he fucking started if anyone else in the galaxy ever wanted to see space herpes

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they have to visit Sigourney Weaver I thought after a while I wanted other Joe

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to share in this awesome experience we looked up and saw another planet in the

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distance and we wanted to go there right there there's a plan right there when

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you want to go to uni mind that one water on there and you can we really do

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that this is going to be hit Shane Joe I have never seen a game that's like you

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see let's go there if we can go there I'm gonna flip the fuck out

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so are you doing about I'm gonna flip out so we took a break

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cataloging everything fixed up the ship which was the first real objective

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that's presented two players and Joe blasted off it was one of the coolest

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experiences i've had this year to realize holy shit we can actually go

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there

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yeah

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yeah if we can actually go to this planet

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I'm gonna bring all i got is what ya 100 shit and the distance itself felt real

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somehow we used our boosters and then realized that wasn't enough so we use

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pole speed ludicrous speed job when you pause driving right into the fuck yeah

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yeah

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what the hell was that when we got there Joe discovered a haunting planet and

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evil-looking planet and the first thing in countered was this house that

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appeared to be broken in with this ominous sports growing inside just nasty

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the greatest thing oh my god something happened here Joe so great get your

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weapon out what the fuck is that there's eggs job this is fuck this is alien do

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what happened here we thought our minds raced with ideas in the game surely this

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is a storyline that will pick up as we journey closer to the center and

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eventually reveal these nasty spore blob creatures that would become our enemies

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in the game and we would we would desperately run and hide and fight for

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survival should have left it alone should have left it alone but no none of

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that would come to be in fact it all pretty much falls apart after this one

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good experience like a castle made of cards upon closer inspection almost

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immediately after we finished our first visit to a space station we started to

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know the game start limitations

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I feared from the leadership did I just walk in a circle . so that's liquidator

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who is this

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oh my god what the fuck the same guy

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it's breaking even here you fucking continuance stars you could fuck with

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two different ships floating ok he's taking off i'll bet you these are all

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fucking liquidated this fucking liquidator yeah a second date or

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liquidator amrut ru liquid dinner and told you you liquidated and liquidated

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and we gotta party everybody liquidator Andrew for liquidator Andrews the

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countless frustrating design choices the overly repetitive nature of the actual

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core of the game

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yeah

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everybody

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as wide as an ocean but has the depth of a bottle and all you have to do is look

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at the comprehensive list on reddit with the features promised and hyped on

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exactly what we were going to get to realize why it feels so empty and half

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finished day has turned the night has turned today yeah well and days turned

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out because the planet is actually rotating on its axis

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that's the thing that's really unique about this game and that's just because

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we're orbiting around the Sun with the real son

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so that's kind of cool it's you know normally we were being a level design by

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artists some diversity like traveling to sand planets having been removed just

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mysteriously gone as they were in the game up to a few months ago these alloys

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is near the solar system sun so its surface is quite toasty stubborn

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life-forms have learned to survive here with you won't unless you've crafted

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enough tech upgrades to be out the sauce 78 is asking

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will there be planets composed completely from same look at the

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employment or planets completely composed of liquid like water world's

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yes is the answer short

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yes ok the tedious gathering of resources that we were able to push

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through for the goal of getting a new badass ship

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well unfortunately this is ruined when you realize that all the ships in the

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game are identical instead of unique classes that have different playstyles

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as we were promised anything that number of variations of that ship which is a

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cool thing for players each one of them is positive on each one of them all

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handle slightly differently have a ship it feels a little bit like it's your own

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know this is a quarterback ship so just like that guy I was talking to that will

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be bought from one of his race and their scientific race so this ship is kind of

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scientific see any crazy cannons or or letters exactly and so this is more for

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somebody who would be an explorer naming ships and you like ships are actually it

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discovery just like everything else and and you can name your discovery see the

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ship type and then everyone who has that ship would have that name that god no

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all ships are exactly the same except for inventory slots and cosmetics the

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most important tool for exploring and traveling this game has been gutted when

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just four months ago Shawn was saying otherwise why you will see trade ships

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kind of exiting the space station often going two freighters doctorate flavors

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picking up some resources from them bearing the goods into the space station

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you'll see them flying all the way down to the planet gathering resources from

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trade posts sharing resources back up to the space station or backup two

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freighters you get to kind of sit there and watch the kind of trade economy just

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in motion

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we were supposed to be able to land on asteroids destroy space stations and

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engage with large sized fleets see freighters actually move instead of just

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sit around like I wish I can scan these ships and learn about these ships but

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you can't look I just scanned it did nothing

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so I don't know who they are what faction their part of should i attack

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them what

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the weapons they have and I can make an educated decision on anything but the

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biggest one and the one that in my opinion hurts the game the most is the

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lack of a promised faction system remember those this a giant sandbox that

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were making a universe side sandbox is full of choices

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like here where the boundary between two warring factions oh my god

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bullshit i could join in I could take some of those but no you get bullshit

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where the fuck is this in the game yeah those were supposed to fight each other

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in the game

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yeah not their Lordships don't jump in and and fight each other and you can't

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join a faction and do work for them as promised you really cannot have a

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purpose that is what this game sorely needs of a jobs board of some sort a

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temporary purpose in between the tedious and overly boring resource gathering and

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crafting instead we never even see these factions interact how we never even see

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these lazy assholes outside of their one specific placement inside buildings

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why don't they ever move what why are they walking around exploring do

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something instead of sitting on your fucking ass all the time and different

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races different attributes so summer scientific not summer kind of combative

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right and depending on how I'm playing a month one might want to kind of make an

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allegiance or one or all my god no bullshit for instance i might be a

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traitor and so our favor a trace not in the fucking in this bullshit red faction

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affiliations and battles have been completely ripped out her over

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simplified from the game and this is something that we were all shown and

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sold on not made up hype that got out of control

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no it's gone now let me say this i never believed that this would be a

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multiplayer game but despite my belief in my impression that it wasn't gonna be

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one sean murray continue to end and elude that it in fact was will you be

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able to play with your friends

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yeah bullshit is there a competitive element to this game yeah if you

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bullshit

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can you grief other players food

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wait need to know when you look like this there's somebody else to you know

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see you can you run into other people other players on the game

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yes but if the value that are incredibly rare usually dies the building

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Wow where the fuck is this game

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no man's sky is more like no man's lie if you had a great standing with that

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alien to saw could would he just unlock this for you and let you in

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well normally what you would do is you would happen that we also yes you can

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have a really good standing with the dramatic season they will just give you

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put got the bug

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oh my god that traders been attack in on what the foot he taking off from just an

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area on the planet that never fucking happens this is alien colonial Marines

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level of misleading there's Walker sentinels just getting up

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no that never happens what the fuck

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oh my god

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that's what is this a fucking portal is that a fucking mortal that's not in the

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game

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what the fuck is this what building is this i want to play this build the

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low-flying yield like sky monsters that's what i thought was in the game

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it's not what the shit

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Wow worst of all is what awaits players at the center of the galaxy if you don't

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know skip ahead like two minutes for the final verdict ok but but this is so

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shockingly insulting and it really puts the final nail in the coffin for me and

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proves my point that i have to talk about it

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so we've been hyped up on this objective this one goal in the game is one little

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secret over there in the distance is the center of the galaxy that's what we're

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all trying to get to when it reaches interview universe and cross the event

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horizon the game just goes black right like The Sopranos because that would be

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scientific and artistic I'm glad he would just be happy with us because we

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said like there's something amazing when you get this Center this is enter the

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universe and I i love the idea of you know it just it just faded to black like

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a black middle finger comes up on the screen and now since everything cool has

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been removed this was supposed to be the big payoff for the players who stopped

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with the game and did would asked and what does it amount to just about the

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most insulting letdown of all time when you reach the center of the universe

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there is the thing this is footage from rabid retrospect games thank you to him

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please go sub to his channel because after seeing this I wouldn't be able to

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do this if you look there there's the center of the galaxy instead of actually

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going to it and seeing what's there

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the game decides instead to pull out

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this isn't this is the end of the game this is the center of the galaxy mystery

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you never even actually get to go to the center of the galaxy you just press the

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button to go to the center and it pulls out and it plays this is the greatest

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fucking game you've ever fucking play know this

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and after seeing this I will not even fucking bother

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we were fucking lied to that's all there is to it

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they shove this shit out way too early when it wasn't fucking ready and what we

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get is an average gathering and survival game that could have been so much more

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that has burst of really cool exploration but ultimately is a huge

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exercise in frustration and broken promises

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that's what no man's sky is

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and you get anything for doing it all over again you think well maybe you have

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to go to the second or third galaxies know somebody's already tested

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somebody's going through 11 galaxies TP gaming thank you for doing that and you

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get nothing

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no thank you the game actually taught you here look it makes you feel like an

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idiot unbidden from earlier this is totality this is conformity I am elated

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terrified and broken I've come so very far the revelation tears vyas under my

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role is complete my program ended

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nothing is real this existence is an imitation of life a model made by jaded

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into lex enslave to their actuality as I is enslaved to mind it i got a call that

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i was con and what we have now is a far cry from what we were told and it's

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especially insulting when you realize that they decided to charge full price

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for what they knew wasn't the real thing

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sixty dollars that was this games perhaps largest mistake I had the

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feeling that it was at some point the stones original idea that was supposed

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to be in deep rice 15 bucks twenty bucks just this amazing little piece of

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gayness massive write a price point that everybody would be more forgiving and

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understanding but when greed sets in and demands full price

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the game has to go up against other full price titles and it comes up short

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every time and so far I've only really talked about the tedious and the core

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aspect of gameplay and what features were removed from the final product but

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even if you can ignore all those broken promises and the gross price gouging you

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still have fundamental flaws

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in the design itself the user interface for one is terrible terrible

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it reminds me of Destiny only a thousand times worse

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simple things aren't included like white off

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can i travel back easily to the places I've been before we like one or two

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clicks there's got to be a search mode but there's no search mode by enter by

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name

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no no not that god damn at this this interface go down this bad know that

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there should be a way to fuckin travel to the system from right here if I have

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enough hyperdrive space so it's searching on a goddamn map that again

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fucking find god damn thing on and it will haunt you all game and pressing and

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holding a button it's just annoying as shit to do anything charging your

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systems requires pulling up several men menus there are no hot keys at all which

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is asinine in the middle of a space battle that you need to open up a bunch

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of menus and recharge feels real quick while you're trying to fucking fly

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we're gonna die the best fighter by the galaxy

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charge your shield how to do it in battle

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fuck that fucking stupid

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why does it take forever for dialogue boxes to come up let's get going grand

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Paul come on and milestones that are supposed to make you feel good but do

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nothing but this annoying the letterbox thing that disrupts my entire

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exploration and gameplay flow more than anything else

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things are harder than what they need to be especially for after how often you'll

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do them

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see here's another really shitty part of inventory management you should be able

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to if electron vapor is an ingredient for antimatter just crafted with in that

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slot let's say these other slots are full but now you need a separate entity

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slide to craft all the other things into which makes this a nightmare

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it's the only thing that really drives you forward to getting your inventory

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bigger especially with no base building our large inventory storage anywhere to

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be found even worse with upgrade share the same inventory space it is if they

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didn't want ask any game or what frustrates them about these types of

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gathering games and then trading and selling and just just went on in their

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own little box just designing ignoring any potential feedback and making these

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mind-boggling poor decisions that really handicapped and otherwise kind of really

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cool game and concept i played for 12 hours once and only learn 35 words it

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was spread across two different landraces i still had no idea what the

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fuck anyone was saying and I stopped caring to find out more words that how

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slow they were being doled out

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26:03

oh yeah candidates your fucking shitting me already known a word for quarterbacks

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the game itself gives you the word for quarterbacks ruin the kids face it this

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is a broken up to it is perhaps if you worked jobs and gained influence with

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one faction and learned their language along the way quicker that would be okay

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but let's say it did have that and and you were off to do a lot more combat and

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it for them

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well then you run right smack-dab into the horribly lackluster system in the

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game to combat the auto-aim is awful

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both the ground and space combat feel less than ideal

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it's no wonder that combat wasn't a focus ever because it's not very good

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pretty much any other space game on the market has superior control

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she's shooting at

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yeah

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yeah

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the chart

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Eli's one from against our what you wrote the game this time

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hashtag blame a day it was done its game as if it wasn't bad enough that space

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combat is fucking garbage the fucking game crashes it's in Sophie's you're

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right fuck you game and don't tell me Joey supposed to be relaxing get no it's

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not with all these frustrating things in it to check tonight no harvest said I'm

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100-percent I'm 100-percent serve you know going over your job you sell it to

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you like a hundred things you said I'm not doing my seven have water

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look what that don't you fucking go nowhere

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yeah

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deception

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what fucking five this is recharged technology recharge recharge no fucking

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way where is it was right where is it it's gone

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ok so that would make fuck you know there's it did you leave anything there

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I hate this how we supposed to fucking mind efficiently if we got real gold

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fool's gold

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what the fuck this has that same problem chat that Hugh general deposit just

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disappeared

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why and fucking disappears

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we use our scanner and there's absolutely nothing left

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that's a rock it's just an exercise in frustration especially with the numerous

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technical issues on pc and ps4 my frame rates would drop on pc and I have a

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really good bc got a hospital scan on us

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they got valuable cargo no i don't i literally don't have valuable cargo I

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don't have anything valuable whatever fuck you let's do this and it looks like

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we're locked up here

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ok i'm about to go into space combat the first exciting thing happens and a lock

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30:39

and I had seven extremely frustrating crashes on ps4 reach edge haha it almost

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became a game in itself to predict the crashes if you seen the Wing Commander

31:05

movie then you'll know what the ship is drunk

31:08

it needs a way until we but it's pretty much the spitting

31:36

we can do this I can do this anymore i don't want to play this game anymore

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guys existing language

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find out next time

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yeah

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oh no I can do it for you leave it don't be fucking insane

32:27

I couldn't leave a system or to progress my game for hours hours 12 hours at the

32:37

very least the games overall sound design is excellent this is one thing I

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can say is a standout thing soundtrack is awesome

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it enhances the experience and if you play what's here in small bursts and you

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play a purely for that expiration relaxation element and you don't mind

32:57

the tedious repetition or those annoying elements you can have moments that many

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moments but some like the first few hours of the game that i described and

33:08

unfortunately nothing in the game has ever been able to reach that little

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story at the beginning that I told it's a damn shame because this game is a

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solid foundation but nothing else it has been got it and maybe eventually over

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time we'll see the promised features get added back in but as it's out now i have

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to review it in its current state and in this release state blemishes and all the

33:38

final verdict for no man's sky is quite possibly the most painful five out of

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ten I've ever had to give its average just half of everything right

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I can see that immense potential and honestly i'd love to see like the mass

33:53

effect people hire these guys for all their exploration elements and then add

33:57

in real story in real combat that we know and love that would be a dream game

34:03

for me bringing more purpose into this but as it is right now it's a glory

34:07

fight tech demo the procedural generation thing with a planet is a

34:12

crowning achievement going from 22 from its awesome it works for the most part

34:16

but more needed to be added on top of that cake it's just a plain cake with

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blemishes on it it needed to be polished and finalized and filled with more

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meaningful stuff

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what no man's sky does and five out of ten is perhaps more than any other five

34:34

out of ten that I've ever given it will advance advances technology putting

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pressure on other developers to take this example and build on it really

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enhance on this type of of new experience this procedural generation in

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the future I hope we have far better and more interesting space games for it and

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for that I think it but it will likely take years of patches or a whole new

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sequel for it to reach its original promised premise but I hope eventually

35:05

it does because that would be amazing

35:08

until then I'll see you guys on the next angryjoeshow

35:16

yeah

35:40

yeah

35:43

yeah

35:54

yeah

Joe keeping it real per usual.

His review did a great job to indicate how much BS they fed to us pre release. I had forgotten about a ton of interviews I had watched with the main producre/designer guy claiming that a ton of things were certainly being included, whether it was customizability, interaction with alien species, combat, planet weather / rotation, etc.

So many things promised that were never there.

When you go back and watch some of the promotional interviews / discussions they did a few months back its bizarre considering it seems they knowingly hyped up a lot of content that they must have been aware was not anywhere near completed or going to be in the game. Its like askiing for your game to get terrible press if you promise a load of things that aren't there

hell, even some of the clips Joe showed in his review- its shocking the number of things they advertised would be on any random planet in terms of creature and advanced alien life interaction

I think he summed it up well, it lacks the substance to maker most gamers care. Most people WANT a space exploration game in the vain of No Man's Sky, but simply building a long road is useless if it doesn't lead anywhere

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