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Forums - General Discussion - Have you ever been cheated/betrayed in some way? I have!!!!

Weebs on 30 November 2007
d21lewis said:
Apparently, a videogame forum is the right place for me to vent, so here goes.....

I used to be the most upstanding person you could ever meet. No smoking. No drinking. No sex. Nothing. Just a good hearted videogame nerd. Back in 1992, I fell in love with a girl named Penny. I spent every waking moment dreaming of her, and what life with her would be. I pined for her for at least a year before I told her how I felt. To my suprise, she told me that she loved me too!

I live in a small town. There was no future here. I enlisted in the Air-Force so that I could start the foundation for "our" lives. I shipped off on April 6, 1995. Penny didn't see me off when I left. Basic training was tough. I was so naive, and STILL a virgin. Penny never wrote me, but everytime a challenge presented itself, I used her as my inspiration to get me through. Eventually, I got injured. Broke both bones in my left leg--tore right through the skin. I got a medical separation from the military after about 1 year of service. I was still loyal to this girl whom I never saw, and rarely heard from. When I got home, Penny was pregnant. I was still a virgin. Why did she keep telling me she loved me? What had I done wrong? I was loyal. I wrote her often. I gave her money. I loved her? I was a fool.

I tried to commit suicide. I wasn't very good at it. It took me another couple years before I could trust a girl again. I finally found a girl I thought I could love when I was 21. It was 1998....but the damage is done. We've been together for almost a decade. So many people wish they could have the life we live. But they don't know the half.

I'm a whore. I have a good girl who trusts me, and believes that I am good. In a lot of ways, I am. Still, everytime I get the opportunity, I am cheating on her. Black girls. White girls. As young as 18. As old as 40. I make them love me. Part of me thinks I love them. I sell them (and myself) a dream, and then I break their hearts. What girl doesn't want a handsome, athletic, take charge, police officer like me? I read people for a living. I become whatever they want. Then I leave them before they leave me.

And there are days when I park my car someplace very quiet, and cry, and cry. I've hurt a lot of good girls because I let one girl hurt me back when I was too young to know what love was. Now, my soul is so black. So, who wants to play Super Mario Galaxy?


*and as for Penny, she gave birth to a mentally handicapped little boy. The guy she screwed was heavy into drugs, I later learned. Hell, I arrested him. She now has 4 children by 3 different men. She's tried to get back with me since then. I can't even stand to look at her. How did I let someone like that have so much power over me?

 I don't know what to say to, but that you've become the very thing that hurt you and ruined your life. Are you happy ?

You're doing what she had done to you but to a lot of others. Are you fulfilled ?

Someone who loves you, trusts you, and is giving you everything that you wish you had before Penny ruined you. Are you appreciative ?

You truly are selfish... 

Penny had got whats coming to her, the children shouldn't be the ones suffering though. Don't go back to Penny.. teach her that she fucked up.. because she did. You let her have so much power over you because she was your first love (maybe.. right?). First loves are always hard to get over.


The girl who committed suicide on myspace because of the break up. I wonder how many deaths will it take for people to realize ? 

 

 



Understanding is the key.

 

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tk1797 on 30 November 2007
konnichiwa said:
*Probably the most horrible day of my life*.

First I will tell ya my situation.  I am living in a neighbourhood that exists out of 80% International students (Japanese, Chinese, Italian, Spanish, Canadians name it and you will find them in my neigbourhood). A lot of them are my friends. So are a group of four Italians and a Spanish guy. I know them more than a year and a lot happened, I went a lot of times with them to bars (whole night on) and some months ago that Spanish guy got a gf. It is his first one.

This evening I went with those guys to the bar again and we found out that the gf of the Spanish guy was cheating him with one of those Italians. (The biggest reason, The Spanish guy is a Catholic guy who didn't want to have sex before marriage but the girl wanted it so she went to bed with one of the Italian guys (a lot of times). First I didn't anything (it was not my gf) then I saw the Spanish guy who was so pain and I understand that but then that Italian guy went to him and said ' How funny you were together with her for 6 months and you never had sex with her, haha I had more sex with her than you , you are a loser"      I could not stand it anymore because I know that Spanish guy will not fight with him so I stand up and hit him in his face. Before I know one of those Italians stand before me and was pointing a knife to me but I just pushed him away
 (I know that that guy is always acting tough but in fact is a coward).  And before I could do 
anything else a bodyguard of the bar was holding me in a karate grip. The same with those Italians.

I had to go to the police and got a fine because of my violent language because they said it was not my problem and shouldn't have done anything.  (It made me mad).

Now I am already home for five six hours but I am still shaking and I cried not because of I was scared of the guy with the knife but because of the world who is so fucked up. What the hell is all this stuf with youngsters who only live for the sex and if you are a virgin you are a loser stuff.

Ps: When I typing this I just heard that the Spanish guy is still not home I hope he doesn't do something to his self. He is damned to sensitive.

Pfff if this stuff doesn't stop I know that I will soon beat someone's soul out his body or one guy out of mine.  I can't wait to leave this Western World for a life in China.

 

Wait, they made fun of him for following his religion. Thats just fucking assholish.

Also the guy that pulled a knife on you, wouldn't he get deported because he committed a violent act.

 



 

d21lewis on 30 November 2007

You're right WEEBS. Part of me feels like some kind of predator. I can sense which girls are "weak" enough to fall for my bull-shit.....pretty girls with esteem issues. They never call until I tell them to. They never demand too much. They just take what I allow them to have. I tell them I have a fiancé. I make them feel like they are good enough to take me from her. I tell them what they need to hear. Then I tell my girl at home how much I love her. One day, I'm gonna get caught. I'll probably lose my job when I do. The department REALLY looks down on scandal, and unbecoming conduct. There's a hole in me, and I don't know how to fill it.

And through all of this, I'm being told by people in the community how good a person I am. Nobody, not even people I've arrested, seems to dislike me.

Part of me is addicted to being in love. Part of me is addicted to the depression that comes with the break-up. I have issues. Hopefully, before I lose my job, my girl, or my reputation, I will become the man everyone thinks I am. This is the first time I admit these things about myself. It looks pretty ugly when I read it. I don't plan to ever look at this thread again, but I am glad to have this "somewhat" off of my chest. Thanks.



ArtofAngels on 30 November 2007
d21lewis said:
Apparently, a videogame forum is the right place for me to vent, so here goes.....

I used to be the most upstanding person you could ever meet. No smoking. No drinking. No sex. Nothing. Just a good hearted videogame nerd. Back in 1992, I fell in love with a girl named Penny. I spent every waking moment dreaming of her, and what life with her would be. I pined for her for at least a year before I told her how I felt. To my suprise, she told me that she loved me too!

I live in a small town. There was no future here. I enlisted in the Air-Force so that I could start the foundation for "our" lives. I shipped off on April 6, 1995. Penny didn't see me off when I left. Basic training was tough. I was so naive, and STILL a virgin. Penny never wrote me, but everytime a challenge presented itself, I used her as my inspiration to get me through. Eventually, I got injured. Broke both bones in my left leg--tore right through the skin. I got a medical separation from the military after about 1 year of service. I was still loyal to this girl whom I never saw, and rarely heard from. When I got home, Penny was pregnant. I was still a virgin. Why did she keep telling me she loved me? What had I done wrong? I was loyal. I wrote her often. I gave her money. I loved her? I was a fool.

I tried to commit suicide. I wasn't very good at it. It took me another couple years before I could trust a girl again. I finally found a girl I thought I could love when I was 21. It was 1998....but the damage is done. We've been together for almost a decade. So many people wish they could have the life we live. But they don't know the half.

I'm a whore. I have a good girl who trusts me, and believes that I am good. In a lot of ways, I am. Still, everytime I get the opportunity, I am cheating on her. Black girls. White girls. As young as 18. As old as 40. I make them love me. Part of me thinks I love them. I sell them (and myself) a dream, and then I break their hearts. What girl doesn't want a handsome, athletic, take charge, police officer like me? I read people for a living. I become whatever they want. Then I leave them before they leave me.

And there are days when I park my car someplace very quiet, and cry, and cry. I've hurt a lot of good girls because I let one girl hurt me back when I was too young to know what love was. Now, my soul is so black. So, who wants to play Super Mario Galaxy?


*and as for Penny, she gave birth to a mentally handicapped little boy. The guy she screwed was heavy into drugs, I later learned. Hell, I arrested him. She now has 4 children by 3 different men. She's tried to get back with me since then. I can't even stand to look at her. How did I let someone like that have so much power over me?

Man, you're horrible.

How can you do the same thing to someone something that hurt you so much?

I was cheated on, that made me stronger, not weaker.



Tetsuo Shima on 30 November 2007
ArtofAngels said:

Man, you're horrible.

How can you do the same thing to someone something that hurt you so much?

I was cheated on, that made me stronger, not weaker.


Not everyone has enough inner strength. Many raped children become rapers... children of the alcoholics also have problems with addiction. Maybe it's some kind of subconsious revange for him. Who knows.



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jjseth on 30 November 2007
d21lewis said:
You're right WEEBS. Part of me feels like some kind of predator. I can sense which girls are "weak" enough to fall for my bull-shit.....pretty girls with esteem issues. They never call until I tell them to. They never demand too much. They just take what I allow them to have. I tell them I have a fiancé. I make them feel like they are good enough to take me from her. I tell them what they need to hear. Then I tell my girl at home how much I love her. One day, I'm gonna get caught. I'll probably lose my job when I do. The department REALLY looks down on scandal, and unbecoming conduct. There's a hole in me, and I don't know how to fill it.

And through all of this, I'm being told by people in the community how good a person I am. Nobody, not even people I've arrested, seems to dislike me.

Part of me is addicted to being in love. Part of me is addicted to the depression that comes with the break-up. I have issues. Hopefully, before I lose my job, my girl, or my reputation, I will become the man everyone thinks I am. This is the first time I admit these things about myself. It looks pretty ugly when I read it. I don't plan to ever look at this thread again, but I am glad to have this "somewhat" off of my chest. Thanks.

d21lewis.   I would suggest that you go and get some counseling from a good therapist to work out the issues you had from "Penny" that hurt you so much.   Sure, there are bad women out there that just use guys and break hearts.  But your Fiance is most likely not that type as she has made that commitment to you.   I know what it's like to be cheated on, and it does suck.   Sure, I had my man whore days, but those are pretty much behind me now, well at least to the point of not wanting to make a commitment and just banging random women.

 Instead of reverting to sex as a release from this depression and hole that she created in you, you should pick up a new hobby to do in your time off.   Something that you can enjoy doing and to keep your mind off of sex with random women.   You are 30 now, and should be at the stage in your life where you can make a change for the better.  I think the problems that keep coming up is because you haven't been able to cope with being cheated on by someone that you thought you loved and that loved you.  

Counseling could be a good step to take to fix yourself and repair that hole in you.  It could be the choice that will help you fix these issues before you lose everything that you love and enjoy.



 


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My pokemon brings all the nerds to the yard. And they're like, "You wanna trade cards?" Damn right, I wanna trade cards. I'll trade this, but not my charizard.