1) Virtual Console: Where the hell is GoldenEye 007? Where is Majora's Mask? Where is Road Rash 64? WHERE THE HELL ARE THE N64 GAMES IN GENERAL?!?! COME ON!!

2) USB 2.0 ports: They are there why the hell can't I save files onto a USB Memory Stick? Why can't I print pictures off of the Photo Channel? Why are they even there to begin with?!?

It's because the Wii is a gaming console, they never planned to make it a media platform like the 360 and PS3.

3) Photo Channel: Why can't QuickTime movies play in that p.o.s Photo Channel even though it says they can play? Why can't I play .mp3 files like I used to be able to?

Why do you want to play quicktime movies to begin with, and secondly, why would you want to play quicktime movies on the wii when you can do it on a PC. PS3 and 360 make legitimate claims as a means to view video's because you can watch it on the big screen. My Wii is hooked up to the same sony bravia as my PS3 is and I'm slightly put off some of the graphics in games as it is, why would I want a stretched out 480p video.

4) Ethernet Port: WHY ISN'T THERE ONE ON HERE?!

Nintendo is attempting to make a sleak console and not behemoths that are the 360 and PS3. AND it's the same reason as why the gamecube didn't have wifi, reduce space.

5) Why can't I save Wii files to a GameCube memory card?

Different formats, same reason why I can't save FF8 files onto my PS2 memories and had to buy a PS1 card off of ebay

6) Why aren't all my GameCube accessories compatible with the Wii?

Because it's called a Nintendo Wii and not a Nintendo Gamecube 2. To put it simply, it's like why PS2 controllers and xbox controllers don't directly plug into the PS3 and 360. OR to relate it to nintendo, why NES controllers couldn't be plugged into SNES

7) Why is the system made of cheap-as-a-whore plastic?

And the gamecube is made of rich-as-a-millionaire titanium? as far as I can tell, the difference between the casing isn't significant issue. Only difference is that the Wii is glossy. What are you worried about, it's not like you throw them at people and need them to remain solid to do damage........

8) Why can't games load more quickly? It is the successor to the 'Cube after all

I'm not even going to touch that one...

9) Why isn't there any voice chat?

It's because nintendo is trying to protect their audience/potential audience (families)

10) Why are the controllers way over-priced?

DS3 costs $99AUD and 360 Controller costs $80 or $65 on special, Wii mote costs $40 with wii-play and the nun-chuck is $27. You do the math

11) Where the hell are the good games? What happened to Disaster? And Project HAMMER? And Pikmin 3?

Where the hell have you been? hiding under a rock? All nintendo fanboys have been shouting out "the conduit" "mad world" "fatal frame 4" "Tenchu 4" "NMH" "Boom Blox" for a while now...

12) Since when does "Third Party Support" equate to "Shovelware"?

It doesn't, it's just that the Wii seems to be getting alot of it and so sony and ms fanboys generalise (I use that generalisation as well).

 Actually, the Official James Bond Video Game License is currently held by EA, the James Bond License in general is held by MGM. The publishing rights to Goldeneye are held by Nintendo, and the program code is property of RARE who has a contract with Microsoft. Therefore, you have a giant cluster___ of people who need to get paid before that game sees rerelease.. 

1) The rights to Goldeneye are owned by Rare, who are in turn owned by Microsoft. As for the rest, so a few games that you like aren't up there yet. Boo hoo, cry more.

2) Specialized gaming device doesn't support all of the peripherals that a personal computer does. News at 11, followed by lengthy round-table discussion of this late-breaking scandal.

3) Um, QuickTime (.mov) and mp3 files DO play. You must just be such a horrible failure that they don't just for you.

4) There's no Ethernet port because this is 2008 and everyone uses wifi.

5) Because GameCube and Wii games use different file formats.

6) Because Nintendo couldn't be bothered to reconfigure the entire system just for a handful of dorks who want to use their Game Boy Player.

7) So what, you're clubbing your Wii with a hammer now? Who the hell cares?

8) Yes, how dare Nintendo deprive me of an extra three seconds of my life while I wait for my games to load. NINTENDO IS SCREWING US AGAIN!!

9) Because nobody likes to listen to whiny twelve year olds spout off curses while playing a nice game of Dr. Mario.

10) Durr... maybe because the motion sensing and IR doohickeys aren't free?

11) Disaster is coming. Project HAMMER was canceled. Pikmin 3 was never even announced. In the meantime, the Wii has arguably the best third-party support of any of the three consoles and Nintendo's awesome first-party games. What more do you want?

12) Since when are No More Heroes, Boom Blox, RE4 Wii, Okami Wii, Zack & Wiki, PES 08 Wii, GH3, Bully, Trauma Center 1 & 2, RE:UC, FFCC WiiWare, LostWinds, and Geometry Wars, just to name a handful, "shovelware"? And those are just released games.

I can't believe I wasted so much time replying to this crap.