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Shadow1980 said:
I can't say "projection," because I'm not a mind-reader and don't know if they are themselves racist, but I was once accused of being a racist by a customer. Our return policy stipulates that if a customer returns any merchandise that does not have a receipt, then they can only get store credit. Well, last year I had one customer (an African-American lady that looked to be in her 30s or 40s) that brought in a massive pile of returns that were split across four receipts. Well, out of this massive pile of merchandise, maybe 3 or 4 items were not on any of the receipts. We double- and triple-checked. When I told her that those items weren't on the receipts and that she could either A) see if she can find another receipt that they may be on, or B) she could still get store credit, she quickly became absolutely irate. She wasn't having any of it. I guess she felt the return policy didn't apply to her or that we were out to screw her or something. I switched spots with my assistant manage, who finished the transaction and sent her on her way.

Well, she called the next day and accused me of being racist toward her. Now, everyone at work knew that was total bullshit, because they know I'm always professional at work, and besides, my assistant manager was up at the front end with me when she brought in those returns (because returns require manager approval, and because he had to open another register to contend with other customers in line). Nothing ever came of it, of course, because we all knew she was full of shit. I've worked retail for well over a decade, and I've had my fair share of complete assholes as customers before, but until she came along I've never had anyone call me a racist.

But in general, I can see how most minorities might feel that any real or perceived mistreatment they receive at the hands of whites is because of racism. There is indisputable history of racism in this country, and it didn't go away when the Civil Rights Act was passed 50 years ago. That shit gets passed down generation to generation, and there are still legitimately racist white people out there that think non-whites are their inferiors. And I'm not just talking about the alt-right assholes on the internet and the white nationalists on parade. Racist attitudes towards black people was the norm here in the South, and those in my parents' and grandparents' generations grew up during Jim Crow. And now many people in my own generation, 30-something Gen X-ers and older Millennials spewing the same racist garbage (I've frequently heard Black History Month referred to as "National N***er Month," as well as the standard disapproval towards interracial relationships). So, considering that many white people still look at them as criminals, parasites, and biological inferiors, maybe minorities are properly paranoid and just assume any white person giving them guff or even not respecting their personal space is a racist prick. Now, some of them are undoubtedly racist themselves, and play the "race card" just to turn the tables on anyone they can. But I doubt most accusations of "racism" are projection.

Very well said.



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This is more likely to happen in a violent, dangerous country like the USA that has tens of thousands of unlawful deaths every year at the hands of drug fuelled, gun toting gang members. In a nice peaceful country in Europe: Denmark, Sweden, Norway, Italy, Spain, France, etc this is unlikely to happen because the Europeans are more laid back easy going friendly people that are more accepting of people of diverse backgrounds. Europe shows the world how to live in peace and get along better. Asian nations, South America nations, Australia/New Zealand have much lower crime rates then the USA and embrace multiculturalism.



Shadow1980 said:
I can't say "projection," because I'm not a mind-reader and don't know if they are themselves racist, but I was once accused of being a racist by a customer. Our return policy stipulates that if a customer returns any merchandise that does not have a receipt, then they can only get store credit. Well, last year I had one customer (an African-American lady that looked to be in her 30s or 40s) that brought in a massive pile of returns that were split across four receipts. Well, out of this massive pile of merchandise, maybe 3 or 4 items were not on any of the receipts. We double- and triple-checked. When I told her that those items weren't on the receipts and that she could either A) see if she can find another receipt that they may be on, or B) she could still get store credit, she quickly became absolutely irate. She wasn't having any of it. I guess she felt the return policy didn't apply to her or that we were out to screw her or something. I switched spots with my assistant manage, who finished the transaction and sent her on her way.

Well, she called the next day and accused me of being racist toward her. Now, everyone at work knew that was total bullshit, because they know I'm always professional at work, and besides, my assistant manager was up at the front end with me when she brought in those returns (because returns require manager approval, and because he had to open another register to contend with other customers in line). Nothing ever came of it, of course, because we all knew she was full of shit. I've worked retail for well over a decade, and I've had my fair share of complete assholes as customers before, but until she came along I've never had anyone call me a racist.

But in general, I can see how most minorities might feel that any real or perceived mistreatment they receive at the hands of whites is because of racism. There is indisputable history of racism in this country, and it didn't go away when the Civil Rights Act was passed 50 years ago. That shit gets passed down generation to generation, and there are still legitimately racist white people out there that think non-whites are their inferiors. And I'm not just talking about the alt-right assholes on the internet and the white nationalists on parade. Racist attitudes towards black people was the norm here in the South, and those in my parents' and grandparents' generations grew up during Jim Crow. And now many people in my own generation, 30-something Gen X-ers and older Millennials spewing the same racist garbage (I've frequently heard Black History Month referred to as "National N***er Month," as well as the standard disapproval towards interracial relationships). So, considering that many white people still look at them as criminals, parasites, and biological inferiors, maybe minorities are properly paranoid and just assume any white person giving them guff or even not respecting their personal space is a racist prick. Now, some of them are undoubtedly racist themselves, and play the "race card" just to turn the tables on anyone they can. But I doubt most accusations of "racism" are projection.

Projection was the wrong choice of words, many here are thrown off by it. What I meant was that people may see others as racists because they have had bad experiences before, so they "project" or overlap these experiences onto other similar situations. For example the lady that thought I was following her because I thought she was going to steal or something, when in reality I  just happened to walk in the same direction as her, most likely she had an experience before where it happened to her or maybe she saw it on tv or something, so now she is a little paranoid and thinks anyone that walks near her in the store is undercover or watching her because she is black and therefore a thief or something. She is projecting her past experiences or passed down knowledge of racism towards everyone around her.

Again the thing I am trying to point is that this sort of mentality where they are always thinking about their skin color and race and what others think of them etc.... Its a harmful mentality in my opinion. Although I know that its hard to not keep that sort of stuff in mind, but I feel likes its become much too extreme in the United States. Anyways I am not trying to fix anything, just wanted to share some thoughts.



danasider said:

Sounds like you have a problem with maintaining personal space. Not saying you're racist, but it sounds like these people wouldn't jump to conclusions had you respected boundaries pretty commonly put in place by society.

Is this a new trend on this site? People b*tching and moaning over others when they are the real problems in these social situations.

Or maybe it is you assuming knowing the situations of those people better than themselves, the situations the OP described gave us enough information on how he did nothing disrespective for social boundaries.



SpokenTruth said:
omarct said:

Well this is kinda of what I was getting at. This sort of stuff happens often to blacks because of racism plus the thug culture and bad image that they have built over the years. Yet I feel like its gotten to the point where they are seen "ghosts" where there aren't any. The main reason I brought this topic up was from watching a youtube video where this very nice looking black youth commented how he was treated like a n**** that morning by a white couple walking down the street. How the woman held her purse closer and the guy starting walking behind her when they passed him. I couldnt help but think back to my own experiences and think that it is completely normal for a guy to walk behind his lady, specially if she has a really nice butt, I do it all the time. I want to trust the guy and believe his racist experience but another part of me is thinking maybe this guy is making racism out of everything.

My point is that it seems racism has consumed some minorities to the point where they link it with every part of their life. And I feel like a lot of those instances it is all up in their heads.

On a side note I have had cops pull out guns on me for putting my hands in my pocket to turn off my Ipod, not something you want to experience I will say. I was around 15 years old when it happened.

Have you ever asked yourself why they suspected racism?  Perhaps it's because it usually is.  So forgive them if they made a bad presumption.  Majorities have given them a reason to be suspicious of it.  You would too if you were one of them.

So it's not so much projected racism but presumed racism.

Yeah, i agree in a lot of cases it may be.

It is understandable that people get more sensitive to smaller less clearly signs of racism when they have faced a lot of real racism before( and of course media and politics also play into this) but also sucks for the one that is assumed to be racist when not having the intention to be.

A colleague of me always talks about white people being the source of everything bad on earth and him not getting evenly chances because of it,now partly that is true but this thought has consumed him so much that it sometimes also sounds like an excuse to hide the fact that he is not always fit for the same amount of chances other people get and not because of skincolor but just being individually less talented.



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Ka-pi96 said:
Eagle367 said:
yellow(who chose that one for east Asians?),

Chinese people chose it. They refer to themselves as "yellow people".

Although they look the same colour as "white" (by that I mean beige because there aren't any people that are actually white) people  to me.

Still stupid. All of them are except brown and all humans are different shades of brown. In fact what the west calls brown included people that are lighter toned than Europeans and darker toned than Africans and also people that look like east asians. And I've seen it first hand. This classification of race iis stupider than what we have which is based on actual tribes and supertribes



Just a guy who doesn't want to be bored. Also

Immersiveunreality said:

Or maybe it is you assuming knowing the situations of those people better than themselves, the situations the OP described gave us enough information on how he did nothing disrespective for social boundaries.

Uh, no. I am going by the information in the post. I was talking about how he mentioned having bad sight and had to get close to look at something. The way it was worded made it sound like he was in someone's personal space and only then did they react. Same as following the second person.

Yeah, assuming racism from being followed or having someone hawk over you isn't the first thing I would do, but it seems in both of these cases he was the catalyst. Could have not gotten in their space and avoided it altogether.



SpokenTruth said:
Immersiveunreality said:

Yeah, i agree in a lot of cases it may be.

It is understandable that people get more sensitive to smaller less clearly signs of racism when they have faced a lot of real racism before( and of course media and politics also play into this) but also sucks for the one that is assumed to be racist when not having the intention to be.

A colleague of me always talks about white people being the source of everything bad on earth and him not getting evenly chances because of it,now partly that is true but this thought has consumed him so much that it sometimes also sounds like an excuse to hide the fact that he is not always fit for the same amount of chances other people get and not because of skincolor but just being individually less talented.

Sadly, the situation has negatively impacted some people to the point they do overly emphasis it and use it as a scapegoat for their own failures. 

And yes, it sucks to be called racist when you simply had the same route in the store or were just looking for something in the aisle right next to them.  But we, as a race, helped create that mistrust so therefore it is upon us to correct it.  It's s stage we as a group set but don't like to individually take responsibility for.  We obviously can't wait for the racists themselves to fix it.

Yeah i understand that mindset but there are people who do not put themselves in any group because they never thought or acted like them, so taking responsibility for those just feels dishonest but we can get respect from those that misstrust us as an individual without having to blame ourselves because when you put yourself in the group that created the negatives then thats kinda the thing you do.

So i agree that we can try to show those that are wary we have good intentions but disagree on the feeling guilthy because the sins of a group part. :p

Result is kind of the same though.



SpokenTruth said:
Immersiveunreality said:

Yeah i understand that mindset but there are people who do not put themselves in any group because they never thought or acted like them, so taking responsibility for those just feels dishonest but we can get respect from those that misstrust us as an individual without having to blame ourselves because when you put yourself in the group that created the negatives then thats kinda the thing you do.

So i agree that we can try to show those that are wary we have good intentions but disagree on the feeling guilthy because the sins of a group part. :p

Result is kind of the same though.

Don't confuse guilt with responsibility. I don't feel guilty for the actions of my grandparents but I do feel a responsibility to correct the social issues they created.  If I don't....who will?  Pass that responsibility on to my kids?  My grandkids?  Like I said, the racists themselves sure as hell aren't going to fix the problems they created.  Hell, many are still trying to make it worse today. 

That said, I'm not putting myself in that group, my grandparents did that.  They created a society where the race is the factor.  I can't change my race.  Whites as racists was the default position for hundreds of years and only by law did that change just 54 years ago.  And it's still happening today.  Doing nothing doesn't appear to be working.  Especially seeing the events of the past 2 years.

Yeah i linked it wrongly to racism in history when reading your post,excuse me for that.

And yes i can agree with you wanting to make the first steps on letting people trust you,thats a good thing for sure and i do/did that myself whenever i am able.



People don't care about the meaning of racism anymore. They only care about the social prestige of calling out "racism" or any other perceived offense or discrimination. Can't wait for this to culminate this year.

Mark my words, by the end of this year you will be called a racist if you only mention your own race or skin color.



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