Lets face the facts, unattractive men are NOT popular. Its starts off in pre-school, where popular boys shun unattractive boys and form the early pecking order, but those unattractive boys usually find another friend and is more or less oblivious whats going on. But come several years later, come puberty, it becomes more apparent and the shunning gets worse as your identity develops.

Attractive people make friends way easier, are usually popular, etc. (women can be average looking & popular as well)

Does anyone agree that if you're unattractive, people will assume you're a loser? You can't just go up and talk to any girl or guy. Making friends is more hard. There are very few people that are ugly who are popular, only attractive people, above average and sometimes average looking people. There is also the "halo effect" of being an unattractive man. We are seen as mentally ill, delusional - we have these damaging labels put upon us even if not true.


Unattractive men:

A) Are rejected by society.
B) Disliked.
C) Ignored.
D) Looked at with disgust.
E) Have an unhappy life and its not their fault being born/looking the way they are.
F) Assumed mentally ill if they get into arguments or just expressing an opinion or making a statement,
G) Are called creeps or sex offenders if they express themselves sexually/ romantically (where as the same actions from a hot guy are not - they are confident, bold, manly)
H) Constantly fed lies like "its not your looks", "just work on yourself", "What makes you think you deserve a thin woman?" (even though your thin yourself/in shape)"
I) Are called psychos if we stand up for ourselves.
J) Are judged on unattractive traits that are 'immutable' or inherited = short stature, small frame, small head, weak face, bad eyes. Where as unattractive women are nearly only ever fat (and can lose it.. become attractive).
K) Less likely to be hired for jobs and even though its illegal, its hard to prove appearance discrimination. In this case we're pigeon-holed or stereotyped on what job we should have (or should not go for) based on looks, and its always "lesser" jobs for unattractive men like cook, cleaner, dustbin men etc.

An attractive person can still be an asshole, and we all grow old and ugly anyway, so it really shouldn't matter. I am a loser, but I don't think my attractiveness or lack of has anything to do with it. Honestly I don't recall seeing anyone I'd call ugly without them purposely trying to be. I just think everyone looks how they look.

Well well, I would say beeing unatractive is definately a disadvantage but I would say for a woman its harder than for a man.

Attractive people get married for the first time before they're twenty, unattractive people get married once, at twenty-four. That's what all that teenage angst boils down to: you wait a little bit longer and pair up anyway. Once you're in a couple “personal attractiveness” is of no real importance and, in any case, age is a great leveller. You might get hired for your looks but you won't be promoted for them. I look at young people worrying about this stuff and I'm just sorry that they still get sold this bill of goods.

As an unattractive male my experience is that anyone, no matter how unattractive, can groom himself to look at least average. Don't just assume that beautiful people do nothing to be beautiful. They have extensive routines. Of course it's easier for some people than others but that's just life. Ugly people have to deal with being ugly, stupid people with being stupid and sick people with being sick.

A lot of what you say is also just confirmation bias. None of that is actually true. I hate to use the word incel but it seems pretty much that you are one. Victimizing yourself will get you nowhere and will only make people treat you even more like an outcast. Looks are a great boost but this society has evolved way past that and there is nothing stopping anyone from doing anything. It may be harder but you can't really blame society for that. Blame god or any other higher power if you must.

I think women can appreciate a man who makes an effort to be physically appealing even if not blessed with naturally good looks. I mean if you have bad hygiene, you accept being obese and have a bad (very negative) personality then don't be surprised if people ignore or avoid you. But I've seen ugly people with friends and relationships, I see them out in public and they seem content with their ugly mates. I dare even say some have done well in life and maybe found some happiness.

Lets be blunt, life isn't fair and sucks even more if you live in crappy country. The great thing about being in the first world is we get to concern ourselves with social crap like this. My advice, if you feel being ugly sucks and hurts your quality of life then go make an effort to be less ugly. I certainly care how I'm perceived so I make an effort to be less gross and I feel others should try to better themselves as well.

Here are my rules for a better life. 1) If you're fat count your carbs. 2) Get smart, it compensates for ugly. 3) Get less ugly, eat better, exercise, etc. 4) Don't be so negative, unless you can find people who are as miserable as you to be miserable with. 5) Fuck an ugly chick if you can't get a hot one, at least it'll get rid of some sexual frustration.

Speaking as somebody unattractive, I'm generally very well regarded and "popular" within my community and social circle.

In my case, most of the respect and positive regard I have earned I attained through my work as a spokesperson in autism advocacy. (That kinda feels like a brag, but its true)

Bottom line, looks are not the only criteria on which we are judged by our peers.

Women in the long run don't need a man to be attractive physically, they want them to be attractive emotionally

It's best to focus on yourself anyway regardless how you look.

The thing is that women/societry love money more then looks. And even looks can be improved on. Packing on some muscles, eating a good diet, proper grooming and building a strong, non-caring personality goes a far way.

Nope. I don't think I'm a loser. But talking straightly from sexual/relationship during school days, then yes being an ugly boy you'll hardly have a gf or be popular. Perhaps for new generations being very inteligent or above average in sports is enough, but at my time in school (34y) looks was what counted.

But good genes are good genes, and usually people that are very attractive at the 12-18 range tends to be ugly after 25-30. So now I can be considered quite attractive, even though I don't need it anymore as my other qualities are more valuable and also married.