Just another day in the life of Bond.

Twas I good sir! I stopped contributing to the forums nearly a year and 6 months past, and have returned to exact my delicious vengeance upon you. Now, lets have at it 'ol chap.

I still am not sure if this is really you or if Sturgeonflyin is telling you to type this for him.

And if it was you, why?  What did I ever do to you?  I have had long and infamous posting history filled with sarcastic and snarky comments so you have to be specific.

There's too much power here, I can't hold no longer...

Anyway, provavelmente foi o corvo que tentou matar você, querido moderador.

Based on your forever avatar Bond I am assuming it is a women's Husband or Boyfriend you got a little too much Bond like action with.

Twas a crisp autumn morning, 1967. I awoke, and kissed the girl of my dreams who I had found and promptly married just last year. As I dressed for work, she reminded me that tomorrow was our first anniversary as a couple. Overjoyed, I kissed her, and promised once I returned, we would spend our evening together just the two of us.

Once I reached the factory however, things did not go as planned, as things often tend to do. I was minding my business, preparing for the company satellite launch as I had been instructed to do, when suddenly alarms rang, and one "Mr. Bond James Bond" begins to up and destroy the entire facility... You killed many of my fellow workers you did, all for those damn astronauts, and the resulting fire horribly disfigured me.
Because of you, the love of my life could no longer look at me, she cast me aside, leaving me no option but to turn myself in, as it appears I had been working for a criminal the entire time... Once I did, the government officials came for me, and after 41 years of medical experimentation, they successfully created me, a rough polygon like monkey space creature... Disgusted by what I had become, I attempted to take over the entire universe, however I was halted by a group of woodland space animals...

Nevertheless, I carried on, unfortunately being struck by an asteroid in the midst of my planning for complete universal domination... The asteroid wiped my memory, and later that year I joined this forum as a means of socializing while I healed from my injury... One year and 6 months ago, I was browsing this very forum, when I came upon your avatar, and the memory all came flooding back... I went insane from my memory recovery, and the damage to my brain, and only just now have awoken from the deepest of slumber that I have remained in as a result of viewing your smug face....

So I did an information check on you, discovered your location, your workplace, and went to work... Soon it will all be done with, once I get my giant polygon hands around your scrawny neck good sir. Now, let's have at it!

And here I thought you'd be a 'buried at sea' type.

god, I really hope that's not what I'm remembered as...

I assumed that James Bond would have a more exciting way of dealing with drained brake fluids than driving slowly and paying a mechanic to fix it :)

I want you dead very much.