Who did I piss off?

Who cut my brake line?

Let me tell the story from the beginning...  

On my way home from work yesterday, I pressed down on my brake pedal which at first gave normal resistance, but then something unexpected happened. My brake pedal went directly to the floor of my vehicle!  Thankfully I was travelling slower than a two-toed tree sloth with a broken leg and the lack of brakes wasn't that big of an issue.  It turns out that my rear brakes were still working which means that my braking ability was at approximately 25%.  I proceeded home at the pace of a 98 year old woman on the way home from a bingo marathon.  

When I arrived at my destination, I popped the hood of my 1997 Gran... I mean 1964 Aston Marton (in pristine condition) and observed that my brake fluid was completely depleted.  I ventured to the garage to get some brake fluid and filled up the empty plastic apparatus.  The fluid quickly went down and a pool the size of Lake Michigan was underneath the driver's side of my vehicle.  I had it towed to a mechanic and finally got it out of the shop today.  After throwing my wallet at the mechanic, he told he that my brake line had rusted since I live in the Midwetsern US and that this happens since we often have inclement weather, but I know better...

Someone wants me dead!

 I dug deep into my mental archives to try and think about who I may have angered over the course of my life.  I came up with outraged chefs, humiliated tailors, jealous husbands... The list was endless!  Then I thought about how I was promoted to the position of moderator at this very site and sumised that my would be assassin could be here.  I looked at my recent history at the site and have come to the conclusion that it may very well be a member here.  We, at VGChartz, believe in innocence until proof of guilt so I will give the person that I suspect a false name.  I shall call him Sturgeonflyin...

This Sturgeonflyin' (that isn't his real name) had a conversation with me before my brake problems and took a blind stab at where I worked the last time that we talked before the incident.  He said , "Have fun working at..."  (I will not repeat what one can easily find on my wall).  I believe that he was trying to get me to accidentally leak where I work to him.  Let me also tell you that this Sturgeonfylin person lives in the suburbs of Chicago as do I.  Then he proceeded to tell me where he supposedly works (once again on my wall).  It's obviously a trap and I'm wondering if I should spring it.

Let's look at the recent facts concerning me and Sturgeonflyin.

Fact - We got into an argument about a month or two ago and he unfriended me.  This hurt me feelings since he has over 1000 VGChartz friends.

Fact - I banned him for being a bad boy.  This was completely unrelated to the above.

Fact - I banned him once more for being a bad boy.  Once again, this was unrelated to the above.

Fact - We have made up and been getting along marvelously as of recently.

Fact - He tries to find out where I work.

Fact - I was nearly liquidated by someone deviously tampering with my brake lines.

I am only observing the facts and examining the clues.  Before you know it, the case will be solved.

I am not pointing the finger of guilt upon Sturgeonflyin, but I shall be observing him closely.  Notice is being served.  I am also keeping a keen eye on Colonel Mustard.  I saw him in the lobby with a candlestick.

So what do you, the VGCharters think?  It's a classic case of "Who done it?"  

Who wants me dead?  

If anyone would like to make an admission of guilt or has any information, suspicions, or evidence pointing in the direction of my would be murderer, now would be the time.  Thanks in advance.

Who else have you been banning? Who else has anyone been banning? Feels like i'm doing all the heavy lifting around here

i kid, but still...

Oh, this isn't a poll?

Well, I still vote yes.

I have banned some other members, but have been on a bit of a "dry streak" as of late.  I have been on a little less the last couple of weeks and don't try to ban a certain number of people just to make a quota.

I didn't lock your thread.  

The one that you're talking about... I think.

Sturgeonflyin'... rings a bell. I looked him up in the user list, but got no results. I also tried Sturgeon, but no luck.

Upon googling the name, though, I stumbled upon a user with THIS as an avatar!

Are you admitting to some sort of guilt?  I was talking about someone who I call Sturgeonflyin.  

Do I need to extract information?  We have our methods.  

Khan, get the hot pokers and thumb screws!   

Someone doesn't want you to see Skyfall.

You, the old man, were driving slow? How surprising.

And thank God for that.  If I weren't, I'd have went from being one foot in the grave to both feet, ankles, calves, etc in one with dirt piled on top.