I disagree there is a positive correlation between some spanking of a child and them becoming a criminal.


I think there is a much higher correlation of messed of kids and parents who did not care about their children, who did not provide any discipline.


Not a big supporter of spanking though.

I think the right parenting style is quite complicated and based on sooo many factors.

One of the big ones is teaching your child proper values and morals. Too many parents fail to do this, or think its society's job or the school's job.

I remember when I was like 11, I back talked to my parents and they said "doesn't the school teach you to respect you parents"

I was like no schools do not teach that stuff at all.

These days societys and school do little to help raise a good child. Parents have a greater role then ever before but in reality parents roles in childerns lives is reduced.

While you're right, the mechanic is the same.

It's an idea that is delivered, an idea that you have control over shaping.

I think the only point that stands for spanking is that it is such an odd practice that it likely does not create a violent atmosphere, but more of a ritual that parents do to kids as it requires total control of another person, which is unlikely to occur in day to day life for a child.

When I got licks as a young lad, I learnt my lesson.

Let it rain, say I

Exactly, people are too lax these days. A few good ol' spanks and whatnot in my childhood actually did me quite good. When I look back at it, I can definitely say I deserved it. I would say knowing that there are some very direct consequences to my actions (not just can't play xbox for 1 day) stopped me from becoming an annoying brat a lot of kids these days are.

But then again parents don't seem to care these days, they would probably come home drunk and beat the crap out of their children for fun, thats not what disciplining is though.

If it doesn't happen frequently I don't see a problem.
Certainly helped me.

nevermind. I've fought enough about this crap.

Each child is an individual. Just because something worked/didn't for you says very little.

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I have a three year old son and he's a great little kid.  Fortunately for my wife and I, he's got a great temperment.  As all kids do however, he can get out of line at times...and for the most part, "time out" works for most disciplinary cases.  When he goes too far and starts talking back or throws a tantrum, he's gonna get a whack on the butt.  On a very rare occasion he has managed to slap my wife in the face, which at that point he's going to get one right back on his...so that way he can know how it feels and know why not to do it.  Hasn't happened in a loong time, kids learn quick.

The most important thing is to show the kid as much love and caring as possible, but that doesn't mean spoiling them or letting them get away with bad behavior.  Strong guidance and discipline when necessary is definitely needed, and unfortunately the 'ol "time out" thing just doesn't work for every situation.  And, for goodness sakes, never ever start that counting bs, unless you are willing to follow through when you hit that magical number.  I like to keep it low, as in 3.  nothing ticks me off more than listening to some parent count to infinity when their kid is misbehaving or throwing a tantrum and then they never do anything about it.  And, never say your going to do something and then not follow through.  If I tell my son he's going to lose out on watching a movie or I won't read a book before bed because he's bad, then he doesnt get it.  Consistency is key, so they know you mean business.

My last thought:  no human being deserves to be abused physically or mentally, especially a child.  Kids are indeed a precious gift.

EDIT. Nevermind, I shouldn't get angry at sociologists who pretend to be smarter than they are.

Does not compute...? If my parents were bad at parenting, then does that make me a bad person D:?

In all seriousness, I was spanked a few times as a child, and from what I remember, nothing set me more straight. My parents didn't do it out of anger. They would sentence me, and sometime later, I would be called over and taken up to my parents' room. I was always told that they loved me, and that disobedience brings discipline. I was a pretty mild child, but there were times were I know I was out of sorts and needed to be disciplined.

Now, I know that doesn't work for all children. My younger brother had a pretty awful temperament when he was little. My parents spanked him frequently, but we were all left baffled when every form of discipline failed. We later came to realize that he was autistic and my parents drastically changed their parenting style towards him compared to my other siblings and myself, and as he gets older it is hard to believe how ill-behaved he once was.

I find it unrealistic with all the posts claiming that parents who spank their children are bad at parenting. There is negative reinforcement and positive reinforcement. Individually, yes, both forms work, but as a sum, they are worth so much more. Every situation is different and sometimes there are situations where negative reinforcement is more appropriate... and sometimes that negative reinforcement is going to be painful. Not every kid is going to respond the same to being grounded or losing their favorite game.

It's not the punishment that is the problem. It is the failure to implement it correctly (bad parenting) that is the problem. Regardless of whether they smack their kid or scream at them, or don't do anything at all, every parenting tool can be used poorly, and as a result, have a negative impact.