They will always blame themself... it with always hurt them.. that's how it works.. you can say that it's your decision, that your parents did a great job raising you etc etc.. but they always will look at it if it's their failure.. tell them, keep respecting their believes, and in time everything will be alright..

Not exactly. It depends on how bad the sins are. For example a friend of my mother's used the services of a witch (how can people be so stupid to believe soemthign like this I don't know), and the priest wouldn't give her communion for a month. In these situations the priest will give you a sort of punishment (praying, abstinecne etc.) for a certain period of time to "purify" yourself. For example, if I told the priest that I snorted some cocaine and then participated in a homosexual orgy, he most likely wouldn't give me communion.

First of all, lol, a witch. Well, it's probably more strict than here then. Just say you had sex then. With a pagan or something :P

Well, if I jump off a cliff I may break my neck (LOL). You're right about the procrastiation part, it actually affects many aspects of my life, though it's usually due to fear rather than lazyness. The advantage is that when I move out I'll be able to just tell them over the phone, then hang up and relax while playing a video game, while all hell breaks loose at their place. If I tell them now I'll be in the frontline, and I won't be able to get them off my back. It's true though that I'll probably be less motivated to tell them when I move out, as keeping up the charade will be much easier.

Nah, this is a lot more like bungee jumping. There is such a thing as over-thinking and over-planning. Sure not doing things in a hurry means you're better prepared for them,  but not doing them when the time is right means you might have to rush them later on, and that sucks.

Anyway, I can't believe your ethically opposed to taking communion and yet you plan to tell something like this to your parents over phone, hang up and pretend it's okay. In my book thats a hell of a lot worse.

No, this lie is just too much, as it will end up involving the police. It sounds outrageously fun, but no!

Ha, it would be fun, wouldn't it? But nah, I wasn't sugesting you to do that, it was just an example for the rest of that paragraph.

The whole "seeking the truth for myself" thing won't make them happy. As I said, they're simple-minded people who've never really questioned their beliefs. My grandmother thinks the world is 4000 years old and that humans and dinosaurs coexisted (and I am no kidding). I'm not sure if the priest could be of any help. Quite frankyl I've nver trusted priests.

I didn't phrase that well. What I meant is you can always say you haven't felt your connection with God for a while, and trying to get it back is something only you can do. Of course you should elaborate on that, have a bit of a backstory, etc.

Say you need to stop pretending and running away from this (frightening!) lack of His touch and face it and understand it or some shit like that. I mean, that's off the top of my head, I'm sure you can do a lot better with the concept of "haven't been feeling God". Should buy you some time.

I know I had plent of opportunities. Frankly I should've seen something like this coming.

Yeah, things are always so obvious in hindsight.

So last year I made a thread about my wanting to come out to my parents... as an atheist. After reading hundreds of posts so carefully written by the very supportive vgchartz community, I decided to wait till I move out and I'm on my own before I tell them. In the meantime I've been able to live a peaceful existence without having to pretend too much to be a Christian (prentend to pray every night before I go to sleep, making the sign of the cross before I leave for Uni, if my parents are watching me etc.).

But alas, all good things come to an end. Easter is near (it's actually this Sunday), the Easter bunny is getting ready to spread joy and chocolate eggs to all, and my parents have had the great ideea that since it's been a long time since I went to confession and gotten communion (it's probably been 3-4 years), I should practice absitence for at elast a week (from food, though it also means abstitence from sex, not that that's an issue for me right now ), go to confession next week and get communion. Now, since the persona I have in front of them is that of a good Christian son, I couldn't find any logical reason why I'd disagree with this plan.

My problem: while the rituals of confession and communion mean nothign to me, I jsut find it unethical to take part in them now that I'm an atheist and don't believe in them anymore. It would jsut be very low of me to keep this act up. On the other hand I'm not ready to tell my parents that I'm no longer a Christian. Comign out as gay would probably be easier for them to handle than that, and I don't want to be around to face the aftemath of coming clean to them (which is sadly not an option, as I still live with them).

My carefulyl constructed web of lies seems to be breaking. I was thinking of just telling the priest I'm an atheist when I go to confession, but the problem is that I don't know what to tell my parents. You can't get communion if you comited a very serious sin, but my parents would get curious, especially 'cause they won't be able to imagine me doing something so terrible that I can't get communion, which will mean that I'll have to come up with even more lies.

Another option would be to find soem way to avoid going to church alltogether, like breaking my leg or something.

Oh benevolent vgchartz community, lend me some of your wisdom and help me get out of this mess. Should I come clean, or continue lying? What would you do if you were in my situation?

All help is appreciated.

I was/still in a somewhat similar situation, though not quite as extreme. My parents are divorced and I live with my Mom. When I first identified myself as an Atheist, I told my Mom and found out for the first time shes an agnostic. However my Dad's side was the problem, especially my grandmother who still doesn't know. I had to visit my Dad every other weekend when I was younger and was forced to go to church and do all those religious things. I went along with it for many years, but I eventually stopped going to my Dad's so often. Whenever I did visit and they brought up religion, I kept my mouth shut.

My Aunt was the first to find out and that was because she saw my Facebook and saw that I was an Atheist on there. I am pretty sure most of them know by now, except for my Grandmother who is the only one to still bring up religion when I am around. We just never talk about it and the few times I have been over there on a Sunday I don't go to church and they never ask me if I want to go with them.

I suggest to not come out of no where and be like "yeah I don't believe in God anymore, I am an Atheist." I do suggest to start giving some hints that you are questioning your belief in God and when they try to answer your questions or w/e, just tell them it seems really far-fetched, etc.

This might help

that facebook thing is a good idea, he should get satanic cult flyers and leave them in his room, so they discover without him saying ^^

I suggest to not come out of no where and be like "yeah I don't believe in God anymore, I am an Atheist." I do suggest to start giving some hints that you are questioning your belief in God and when they try to answer your questions or w/e, just tell them it seems really far-fetched, etc.

Here's what you do, come home one night covered in blood, have the wild look going on, then break down crying and tell your parents that you've just killed someone. They'll freak the fuck out, but they still love you, so they'll feel obliged to help you get rid of the body and clean you up. Tell them what happened (obviously a fake story) and keep it going for like 10 minutes, let the madness set in and once your parents are at a ridiculous level of horrification and despair, spring the atheist announcement on them and tell them you didn't murder anyone. They'll be so happy and relieved that your not a murderer, that being an atheist will look like a huge step up.