Do not do this I am a professional.

[MrBubbles]

Dodece said:

8. Dirty rotten scum sucker.

Chances are you will be standing with strangers. Chances are you may never see them again, and even then they will probably not recall what you are about to do. Cell phones are the best way to do this. Just dial a number you know into your phone and hit disconnect. Then proceed to rant about something to a ficticious person. My favorite gag is having a daughter that wet the bed again, and vehemently suggest its time to use the cattle prod on her as a form of corporal punishment. Now someone might try to give you some lip about your sadistic practices. Just look at them and ask them if you were talking to them. Then turn around and continue with your pretend conversation. Laugh deep inside at all the emotional turmoil you have caused the group.

unless, of course, you have someone in line that would quite possibly harm you.  Or you have someone who decides to contact the authorities on you.  which at least could cause you a headache, and at most earn you some criminal charges.