1) Be honest with yourself.

2) Believe in yourself.

3) Accept yourself.

4) Take pride in yourself.

5) Be open to change.

6) Accept that shit is going to happen to you no matter what.

7) Make NO excuses for yourself.

8) Don't complain about something unless you're willing to offer a solution or take action.

9) Accept things for what they are.

10) Treat everyone else with the upmost respect regardless of who are and what they are.

The "attractiveness" becomes a non-issue.

Sure confidence can show in how a person acts but not always. I guess it's still better to act confident even if you're not though.

Very true, gives you motivation to do things.

This makes sense, but you're making assumptions when gauging other people's confidence. As you said they can be hiding their thoughts and faking their behaviour, but I suppose it doesn't matter much when most people take others at face value.

Have you actually tried though? I'll be in the same position eventually if I survive that much longer, but I'll have never even asked a girl out so it's entirely my fault.

I knew I had no chance at 16, I knew I was Autistic and that meant I had no chance at dating. It is hard enough for Normal people in dating world, try being an Autistic male and a social pariah that repels people. Can not read body language, can not detect changes in tone, avoids eye contact, so many things going on is distracting and visual and sensory overload. I look at the entire room and all the different things, objects, people, I keep looking at everything and try to take it all in and process it all, so distracting. There is the social awkwardness, social anxiety and fear that prevents me from getting the words out. The darn cat's got my tongue again! I know what they are thinking: this guy is a creep/weird and he is evil!

This is a funny thread filled with funny responses. Of course attractiveness matters.

Those who talk about "confidence," for instance -- well, yes, it does help to be confident. But where do you suppose "confidence" comes from in the first place? If you're a good-looking kid, for example, the world is going to respond to you in a certain way... a way which will encourage you, and help you to develop that confidence. If you're bad-looking, the world will respond very differently. You will be met with rejection after rejection. Good-looking people have a tremendous advantage, both in this regard and in many others.

People discriminate, unfairly, for all sorts of reasons. We talk a lot about "racism" and "sexism" and etc., because they're easy to identify and have social and historical prominence. But we also discriminate based on socio-economic standing, base attractiveness (I don't mean "hygiene" or clothes, but those mostly unchangeable physical characteristics with which you were born), age, height, weight, and a host of more-subtle physical and cultural factors.

Are there "ugly" people who succeed, in all sorts of ways, despite this? Of course. But that doesn't mean that the general discrimination does not exist, anymore than the election of Obama proves that racism no longer exists. The OP deserves to be taken seriously. It may certainly be the case that, right now in society, the best response is just to take control of those things that are within one's power (e.g. work to be smart, to dress well, to earn money) in order to have an easier time of things -- but let's not say that prejudice or discrimination against the less beautiful does not exist.

There's the cheesy old saying "you never know until you try." Course in my case, while I never tried to have a girlfriend, I did try many times to have friends which all ended badly for one reason or another, so naturally I feel I have no chance as well if I can't even maintain a single friendship. So yeah, I have no advice I can give you here, sorry. D:

Well, ugly men have less possible partners to choose from (especially with a low paid job) and the really ugly ones may have problems to be the “cool guy at the school“ but when I look at the list of billionaires at Forbes then it definitely shows that your skill is way more important than your looks to be successful.

Sure, your look may help to get some jobs easier but in the end you can be ugly and still reach great positions if you show how good you are at something.

But if you already have the mindset that your look kills all your chances to reach anything in life then this will block you from reaching anything

I think it's tougher for unattractive females actually. I see unattractive men with good looking women all the time, it's all in how a man carries himself, confidence, how he treats people etc; Whereas most men won't give a woman a chance if she's ugly.

looks matter, but they aren't everything
i'd say most important thing for a man is developing a good mindset that is isn't self defeating or self pitying
negative mindset above all i would say would hamper a man's chances for success in whatever pursuit including women
but i do understand that its hard to cultivate a positive progressive attitude when you don't have certain base advantages to work from(looks, money, network etc), but that's besides the point you still have to cultivate that mindset to progress anyway

one method i'd say can help is working out, not only will you become more active and physically attractive, but as you progress you'll have something to be proud of hat you can share with others and can boost your confidence
hobbies in general are good too

Displaying self-confidence is something that can help, as many others have said, but I think a problem with that is that people trying to give the appearance of confidence can over-compensate and end up crossing the line into seeming arrogance. This in turn causes them to be seen as someone who needs to be brought down a peg or two, which can end up being much more damaging to a person with naturally low self-confidence than someone who actually IS arrogant and/or overconfident.

Yes, I'm an automatic loser.