Telekinesis

See through materials. Wouldn't that be awesome?

Agreed.

Yes seeing through materials would materials would be pretty cool I ain't gonna lie, but I think my ability to manipulate people's minds just edges out your power imo :P come on now, there's gotta be someone out there you want to embaress, even for one minute.

Invincibility - I could be stabbed, shot, punched, etc and never get hurt

Mimic!

The ability to physically transcend the distance between two computers and slap a fanboy from across the globe

I would have the power of a "Motherf***er". Because, as we all know, they can seemingly do anything. I've heard people say "Look at how fast that MFer is." That MFer is strong!" "That MFer can hit a ball!" Stuff like that. Limitless power.