1. Dead Pres or living me

My life. I like my life. And besides, the structure of the U.S. government is pretty much designed to destroy any attempt to better the country or the world (oh yeah, and I'm not an American)

2. famous hack or unappreciated genius

Greatest Genius without appreciation. I'm going to trust history to be a good judge on this one. And why on earth would anyone wish to be a hack?

3. walking potato or gorgeous sack of potatoes.

I'll take the hottie. I can still do whatever I want to her in bed.

4. Nickleback or Saul Williams

The great poet. Again, why would I wish to be a hack?

5. Risky doors

I don't care how good the other option is, I'm not risking my life on a coin toss. I'd walk away

6. if by killing yourself, all your enemies will be destroyed as well, would you kill yourself?

I don't have enemies. but if I were at wore and the stakes were high enough, I might be willing to make a sacrifice

7. Angry Nam Vet or judgemental Christian

The Christian. I'd argue their beliefs in to the ground by day and terrorize them with fun by night.

8. Meow

Sure, why not. It'd only take one or two stomps.

9. if you loved someone with all of your heart and they hated everything about you, would you take ten years off of their life if it meant that they would love you in return?

No, just because instead of thinking "they'll live to 80 instead of 90" you might get "they'll live to 30 instead of 40" I'd play that one safe and pass

10. Hell's recruiter.

I'll take the deal on one condition, I get to tempt that judgmental douche from the road trip

Now here's my conundrum. Food or sex. If you pick food, you'll always have access to whatever delicacy you could wish for and you will never get fat, but you will never feel a hint of sexual desire or pleasure. If you pick sex, you will have whatever partner(s) and whatever fantasy you could ask(and unlimited stamina), but you will never feel hunger and your tastebuds will die. Food paradise with no sex or sex paradise with no food?

Damn you stof. Too difficult.

Oooh Stof - that ones not moral but its a toughy. Food I think.

Heres another (slightly more demented) one. You have three choices, death, full paralysis or dementia. Which do you choose?

Full paralysis. Mental diseases have such a scar on your family emotionally. Death is so damn tramautic. Full paralysis... I can't play video games! Oh god, no!

i like you guys better than my friends in real life. theyre all a bunch of retards. you guys actually have intelligence; i like it.

I sense a little dependence. angrypoolman, I'm going to prescribe you 20 NeoGAF and 100 Gamefaqs threads a day to get you off your addiction.

1. Yeah, there's really no benefit to being the president in my book, so I would probably just stay the way I am. If the question were "being jessica alba's husband" then i'd have to think about it.

2. greatest genious on earth, who cares what the world thinks?

3. I'd take the hot chick. Sorry but realistically how often does sex happen anyways? Out of the 24 hours of your day, how many hours of it is devoted to sex? Probably not as much as you'd think (or as much as you'd like). Okfine so the love making might not be the greatest but what about the other 90% of your life?

4. No, I would not want to be Fred Durst. I'll work with being an obscure poet.

5. I'd walk away. If I had a coinflip's chance in dying, its not worth it.

6. I don't have many enemies. And if I did, its not like they are evil dictators or masterminds who have doomsday devices or anything. My enemies are like "man, that guy is a douche" and they really aren't worth dying over.

7. Vietnam Vet. Especially on a long road trip, I would feel safer with an angry armed vet at my side If I get into a situation where get mugged or something.

8. I would have like 5 years ago, but now as a pet owner, I'd probably say no. That's just messed up.

9. No, plenty of fish in the sea, bro.

10. yes. I'd tempt every single douchebag out there in the world.  I'd rather take this deal than the stupid kitten one.

Death easily. Being demented is a meaningless life to live and often associated with lots more suffering than joy. Being completely paralised is a horrible condition associated with huge suffering through frustration and anxiety.

Yeah, I'll take Death. Dementia is actually probably my greatest fear in life (it really scares the crap out of me how forgetful I can be sometimes) and as for paralysis. I would have chosen it, but since that damned Diving bell and the butterfly guy became big, I couldn't even blink out a book and seem original.

1. You have to choose your life as it is right now. nothing will get any better, nothing will get any worse. you will maintain the current level of quality in your life for the remainder of your life. or you will become president of the united states of america, but you will be assassinated one year before your term ends. which do you choose?

Current life.

2. would you rather be the greatest genius on earth, but never appreciated in your own lifetime or considered a genius within your own lifetime, but thought of as a mediocre hack after you died?

I'd rather be the genius - I'd know I was right and as a hack I'd know it too and be secretly bitter

3. would you rather have a sexual partner who was great in bed, but was so ugly that they were somewhat of a social embarrasment, or would you rather have a lovely sexual partner who happened to be completely terrible in bed, but made people terribly envious of you?

Attractive - shallow I know but there you go.

4. would you rather be the lead singer of an extremely popular but mediocre rock band, or would you rather be the greatest poet who ever lived with a small but dedicated fanbase?

Show me the groupies - they'd make up for my sexualy terrible but attractive partner from number 3.

5. you are presented with two doors, but three options. option number one is to open the first door, option number two is to open the second door, option number three is to walk away. behind one door, there is fame, fortune, and fulfillment of all your dreams, and behind the other door is an axe wielding maniac who will chop you to pieces the second you open the door. you dont know which of these things is behind which door. do you choose to open one of these doors or do you choose to walk away?

Walk away - 50% isn't good enough odds with such a severe level of risk. Besides, I'd still have the groupies.

6. if by killing yourself, all your enemies will be destroyed as well, would you kill yourself?

I have no enemies. Besides, I'd prefer to try and kill my enemies and survive.

7. if you had to take a long road trip with either a vietnam vet with a bad temper who had a gun on his person at all times, or a conservatvie christian who quietly judged everything you did, what would you choose and why?

The Christian. I could safely annoy the hell out of him back without fear of reprisal.

8. if you could obtain immortality by stomping a little girl's pet kitten to death before her crying eyes every christmas eve, would you do it?

Probably - and I love cats. But we're talking immortality here. Now if the question was stomping the little girl to death... that's tougher.

9. if you loved someone with all of your heart and they hated everything about you, would you take ten years off of their life if it meant that they would love you in return?

Sure. We're talking about their life, they shouldn't hate me, I love them with all my heart!

10. if you died and went to hell, and found that it is every bit as horrible as the christians make it out to be, eternal fire, eternal suffering, eternal pain; but the devil offered you a deal. he said that for every soul on earth that you could tempt towards damnation, you will experience a one year reprieve from the agony of eternal hellfire, would you take his deal?

Sure. Better to rule in hell, etc. Besides, I'd be pretty pissed at the christians in this case and would consider it fair revenge!