I bought the PS3 version as well (LBP was sold out and the 360 version of F3 was as well, and I didn't feel like waiting) and i can honestly say I have had nowhere near the problems you have had.
The only thing you listed that I experienced was when somebody signs in and it freezes, except it only froze for me for 2-3 seconds. I ended up just signing out of my PSN, no real biggie there.
My controller is responsive and I have not had any problems that had me restart my controller.
I don't know this "game stopping bug" that is "periodically within the first 20 minutes of game play". The game has not frozen or crashed on me once.
As for the framerate issues, it has the occasional hiccups but nothing too bad and I expect it in a game of this size. I had my buddy Dan bring over his 360 copy so I could play it and see how big of a difference there was. (in whether or not I should return my PS3 version for credit and get it for 360 when it came in) I found the 360 version had less framerate hiccups, but not by a huge amount and definitely not enough for me to go return the game and start my game over.
I don't know why your experience has been so troublesome, but my time with the game has been extremely fun. The game runs more smoothly then Oblivion ever did. I also imagine there will be a patch at some point. To compare this to the Madden 08 debacle is a little extreme.
EDIT: On the trophies front, that is a blow for those who like that stuff, I personally don't. They're a nice bonus for the 360/PS3, but I don't even try to get any, i just get the ones that I get through my normal play through.