http://www.gamesradar.com/f/top-7-thats-a-dude-game-characters/a-20080825125523210002
Damn, that girl is smokin... oh... that’s a guy?” Surely, we’ve all fallen victim to such a scenario. Not you, you say! You’re a hardcore gamer with 20/20 vision and a keen eye for Adam’s apples and moose knuckles? Fine! Many of us aren’t as perceptive, so we’ve decided to highlight those brave folks who might not have gotten their sex the first time around.
This isn’t simply an excuse to point and laugh at the femmy kid, heavens no! We at GamesRadar are well aware there’s no humor to be mined from the transgendered, and that being gay is, most certainly, serious business. Nay, this PC article is a semi-researched, gender-bending celebration! And when need be, we’ve got reasoning, fan art, and crotch shots to back up our claims of confusion. Um... so there.
Shades of Lady:
- Semi-exposed midriff
- Absolutely adorable hair
- Cries
Proof of Penis:
- Kissed a girl once. But anyone of drinking age and access to a Girls Gone Wild commercial, or college, knows girl kissin’ is no longer the sport of men alone.
The Final Fantasy series isn’t exactly known for its masculine protagonists, but Tidus (which we’ve taken to boldy pronouncing as “Tit-us”) was a whole different ball of wax. Early on we see a refusal to part with his half-hoodie while underwater and go shirtless with the rest of his fellow aquatic athletes that can only be described as Mulan-esque.
Above: "Dude, lose the hoodie! You're draggin' the team down!"
But if you skipped the Blitzball portion of his past, as most gamers did, you were presented with a character capable of hormonal moods swings, swerving from giggle puss to crying jag in a Zanarkand minute.
Above: Tidus propositions Steve Carell
Shades of Lady:
- A red mane that's the envy of all
- Dons a purdy pink corset
Proof of Penis:
- Kind of a player
- A self-centered prick
Above: Fan Art by ~Kara-pu
You may not know it to look at him, but Zelos is actually quite the lady's man - and not the other way around. Plus he’s no stranger to spying on women in the shower, and that’s something you’d never catch a lady doing. Think about it...
Shades of Lady:
- Candy colored clothing
- A hint of mascara
Proof of Penis:
Above: Neither camel toe, nor moose knuckle - It’s a draw, folks!
It’s funny, before the recent update, no one bothered questioning the sex of Sega’s favorite preening eunuch. Guy, girl - who cared? He could fly, and that’s all that mattered. But Journey of Dreams made the ambiguity of Nights' gender slightly more menacing by giving "it" a voice that can only be described as half female and half demon.
Oh yeah... and he/she, uh, has a tendency to kidnap troubled children in their sleep and ask them to touch him. Her... whatever. This isn’t necessarily isn’t gender specific, but we dare say it’s somewhat inappropriate.
Shades of Lady:
- The prettiest green dress you ever did see!
- Goth-chic haircut
Proof of Penis:
- A voice that could wake the Gods.
Hey, some people can pull off a green tunic, others... not so much. Jiro may look like a young Natalie Portman, but once you hear his booming English voice over, it’s clear this dragon-capable firebrand is all man. Or boy.
Above: Girls, what's my weakness? MEN?
Shades of Lady
- Eyes you could disappear in for days
- An hourglass figure that’s to die for (Am I right, ladies?!)
Proof of Penis
- Voted ORICON Magazine's #1 "Sexiest Male Singer"
- Shirtless pics available for all ages
This J-Pop star has made quite the name for himself for by not looking like a “him” at all. Evidently, his gender defying persona is so popular he’s made numerous successful jumps to films, anime and games. Yes, he appears in FFVII's Dirge of Cerberus and Crisis Core, but our boss has asked that we trim down androgynous Squaresoft entrants from "billions" to "several."
Instead, we’d rather point to his starring role in Bujingai: The Forsaken City, the stylish Devil May Cry knock-off that time forgot. Armed with a massive sword, acrobatics a’plenty and the cutest set of earrings you’ve ever seen, Bujingai rose above the glut of "me too" hack-and-slashers. Praised for its winning presentation and intuitive combat, most of America still couldn’t get past the perceived notion of playing as a transvestite. Too bad for you, Jethro.
Shades of Lady:
- Dressed as a nun
- His name is... C’mon, just look at him!
Proof of Penis
- Several pictures readily available on the internet we can’t post here
- Outside of being a dude, not much
Story time! Bridget was born unto a village where two twins of the same gender are considered bad luck. So to avoid the Spartan baby pile, he was raised as a she, and remains completely baffled as to why he's confused for a woman. Evidently, Bridget would like to make efforts to appear a little manlier, but unfortunately, none of them include not dressing as a sex-starved lady of the cloth.
Shades of Lady:
- Red hair bow
- Eye mascara
- PINK!
- Lays f***ing eggs!
Proof of penis:
- Nothing... Except for this!
No matter how many times we report this little factoid, it still raises an eyebrow or two. Do you have any idea how many young boys this pink... thing helped usher into manhood? The fact that Birdo is "made of dude" is just as shocking now, as it was to the seven or so people who actually read the instruction manual in 1988. Especially when males lusting after Ms. Pac-Man, Minnie Mouse and Smurfette realized their heterosexuality hinged on something so flimsy as a hair accessory.
Above: Don't judge! If that's Yoshi's thing, more power to him
As far as the West is concerned, Birdo is all lady now but we know the truth and support him nonetheless. In case the rest of the article wasn’t an indication, Japan doesn’t have near as many hang-ups compared to the US when it comes to transgendered characters, and it's a courtesy also extended to gay dinosaurs. But just in case we haven’t rocked your conventional sexualities to their very core, we gotta hit you with a classic screen guaranteed to befuddle boners until the end of days.
Above: You go girl-guy!
I didnt know birdo was a guy 0_o
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