Thanks Duderino. We are doing ok in general. My main concern is my little bro, who was not quite 14 when mum died last year. But even he seems to be getting back on track with school and friends and stuff.

@Dolla.
If you know his family I'd try to give them a hand in some way. Maybe even just take dinner around on a night or two? Or just drop by every few weeks, and then later on every couple of months. Believe me, they'll notice the kindness, and you will feel better for checking up on your friends family.

sorry for your lose dude......

the only way i get by is telling myself that they are (hopefully) in a better place

@starcraft: My little brother is also 14, sometimes I worry about him like he was my kid, maybe because I´ve seen him grow up and helped raise him... whatever bad happens to him effects me as well... good to hear your brother is at least somewhat ok, something like that happening at that age must be a nightmare...

Truly sad news, Dolla

I guess the best way the living have to honor the deceased is by carrying on as best they can and relish the memories of times spent together.

 Perhaps you and some of your coworkers can have lunch or a meeting for an hour or two to remember your colleague and make some jokes, share stories and words of wisdom.

 Sorry for your loss as well, Starcraft. I have enjoyed some of the battles you've fought here in the forums. I may not agree with 100% of everything you've ever written, but I wholeheartedly approve the way you stand by what you believe in. The fact that you are the namesake of my favorite game of all time (perhaps 'till Starcraft 2 arrives) can only help. May you have a wonderful and prosperous life that makes your dear mother proud.

 A book I really love is Man's Search for Meaning, by Viktor Frankl. This man endured some of the worst horrors imaginable (living in a concentration camp in Nazi Germany, losing his family). Still, he kept his sanity, carried on and has published some remarkable insights on the human spirit throughout his books. It's a short book, so you can read it in a night or two. I really love an anecdote about why Frankl, having received an american visa to flee Vienna, chose to stay with his parents. I can write it from memory if anyone is interested in reading it here. Otherwise, just get the book. It's incredibly inspiring.

I'm really sorry to hear that, man.

There's not really a "one thing" you should do in my experience... What works for me doesn't necessarily work for you. But usualy it's best to let it all out the first couple of days/weeks, and start to move on and do fun things for distraction after that.

I wish you the best man.

There is a theory that the reason people get so upset about unexpected deaths is because they despise the feeling of not having any degree of control over the situation, they hate to think that they were unable to prevent it from happening. It is in human nature to despise feeling powerless, which is exactly how an unexpected death makes one feel.

Some young people today live by the belief that grieving is redundant when they had no control over the outcome in the first place; they even express contempt for those who don't follow their line of thinking. They react in this way even if a close loved one is lost. It is quite a radical way of thinking but these people are generally able to move on from a loss very quickly. Make of that what you will.

That would be my advice to the topic creator - think about that control theory. Death is never a good thing but that's not to say we can't find new ways of thinking that soften the blow.

Sorry to hear that man . My friends older brother committed suicide 2 years ago out of nowhere. Known him forever always looking out for me like I was his lil bro and everything.Its ok to morn for awhile ...live life like its your last day don't take things for granted .

Thats simply awful mate.  I thought it was bad losing someone unexpetcedely to natural causes, but your situation is almost impossible for me to fathom.  Good on you for getting through that, I'm not sure I could have.

Take some time to bury yourself in the things you enjoy and the company of the people you love. That's about the best I can offer. I've had members of my extended family die, but it's always felt totally disconnected from me.
I actually find it hard to understand how people could be so deeply affected by someone dying who isn't closely connected to their own life. Of course, my belief in the afterlife may have something to do with that. I don't see death on its own as being an inherently bad thing.

I agree with DmeisterJ ... gaming and movies usually help to forget about your pain . I do that all the time . Ive lost a couple of loved one , and every time I played games or hanged out with friends .