Hello, Pardon the rant...but this is the OffTopic Section.  

How many of you out there are looking for a job?  Hitting dead ends?  Not getting call backs?  Well I have a few very simple pieces of advice that seem to be outside the realm of "common sense" when it comes to selling yourself as an attractive candidate for hire.

I've worked in various retail positions throughout my work history and I'm always surprised that some folks either don't know, don't consider, or completely disregard a few of these:

1. Show up to inquire about a job, pick up an application, or go to an interview in your best clothes.  

      I've seen too many people come in to pick up an application in flip flops, shorts, old dirty sweaters, etc.  This is your first impression, folks!       You don't get to make a second first impression. So even if you're just heading out to pound the pavement and grab a few apps, put on             your Sunday best, at least.  No one likes to be judged, but your employer will judge you anyway.

2. Do not ask to borrow my pen to fill out your application.  Or use my counter.

      The first rule about getting a job is to show you have your life together, even if you don't.  And part of having your life together is having         the right tools for the job.  A pen is the most important tool when you're out looking for a job.  As far as where you should fill out the             application:  Somewhere else.  Go around the corner to the coffee shop (but make sure you don't ask for an application while you're                 there!).

3. Please, Please, don't call me "bro."

      Odds are the person you are talking to is the manager (or it should be).  For all intents and purposes, this person deserves your respect.  He       or she, is afterall, the one that holds the keys to your employment.  Show some respect, even if you don't feel they deserve it for whatever       reason you've decided upon meeting them.  This includes making good eye contact, presenting a firm handshake, and speaking in a                   professional business manner.  There's no such thing as being too formal at one of these meetings.  If your demeanor is too stiff or rigid,         the person taking your application will let you know, and it won't be a bad thing.

4. Don't shop, lollygag, or hang out.

     That's cool that you like the stuff I'm selling, but don't you have someplace to be?  Like filling out that application or getting another?                Certainly you have an interview scheduled somewhere.  

Again, my apologies for the ranting nature of this post, but it comes with the best of intentions.  Sometimes you don't realize the mistakes you commonly make unless someone points them out.  These are just a few I witness on a regular basis.  Thoughts?  Care to add your own?

I love you, but bro...Gimme a pen

Many of those points are blessedly falling by the wayside as companies move online. I know my current job did, as that means less effort for job seekers and less chance for the employers to let these biases creep in (well, you have to have good spelling, at least). Then you only have to be on your best behavior for the interview.

For my random anecdote, it seems like i'm finally starting to get the hang of this networking thing. It's just a lot more involved than I was able to be back when i was still living with my parents, before i moved out for grad school. Still got a ways to go, but it doesn't seem quite so mysterious or impenetrable anymore.

? What was the problem?

I never understood how networking worked (and probably made a few threads to that effect in my bouts of "i'll never get a real job" angst). I'm beginning to do so, but it's a function of being back in school and thus being surrounded by people in my field. Instead of where i lived, where no-one does what i want to do.

This actually brings me to another point.  My add on the 'ol Craigslist actually states at the bottom of the paragraph "Apply in person at..."

You'd be amazed how many emails with resumees I get.  Now I understand that everyone's time is money, etc, etc.  But following directions thoroughly and accurately is a prerequisite for employment.  Let's just say that those that don't apply in person failed their first test.

I'm in retail...I'm hiring for personality.  If that's a brutal truth, welcome to the real world.  

Meh.. don't worry about it.. some people are way more natural with it then others.. I'm an awesome networker but I see the troubles a lot of my students are having when they finish the study and go on their own.. (graphic) designers basicly live from networking.. you can't survive on making a flyer for the birthday of your aunt.

Yes talking smooth helps and makes it easier but a lot of them are just too scared to get into a networking situation..but they tend to forget that the other people there are also interested into networking.. It's easier in my position as designer, we have a lot of openings (film, festivals, stores, theatre play etc etc), special events, friday afternoon drinks.. and as teacher (we have a lot of "events" that the school organizes).. I have a lot of meeting moments to network..
But still I drive for 1,5 hour to a meeting moment if it seems slightly interesting to me.. a lot of people think beforehand: it's not worth it.. you make it worthwhile.. If you think you didn't meet anyone interesting you damn make sure that  a few there found YOU interesting.

I'm telling you: every one you meet there has the same doubt about networking.. its not easy, it sucks, you have to put yourself out there, and everyone is gonna try to hit on the hot blond woman.. but its already an achievement to just be there

Just remember: the best deals are done during a smoking break.. be there even if you don't smoke

Heh, i'm in retail too. I'm just not a fan of filling out manual forms that are always asking all of these different questions, often stuff i don't know. Now, manual resume submission (as opposed to manual application-filling) is a different matter, and one i'd more readily oblige.

Your resume has what you want me to know.  My application has why I want to know.  Like how much you want to make per hr, for instance.  That's an important question and your answer to it speaks loudly about whether you'll work and for how long.  I want both. :o)

It feels like I'm reading Cracked, and I hate Cracked.