We would miss you.. And terribly worried if you suddenly don't show up anymore on this site.. If you have the chance go to college. Go... Not only to study to hopefully get a good job later on but especially to meet new people. Most of my friends who I still reguraly see are from that time.. Btw. Your cousin is a loser.. Be better then him.. You can't change your past but you can build a better future for yourself..

wow you should definitely go to college i felt a similar void in my life before i entered college where i met some of the best people i know

Sorry to hear that, he should be ashamed of himself quite frankly, putting a woman before his own kid, you're still really young.

How long until you go to college?

Unfortunately, not. When he asked, Who is this? I told him that it was me trying to find out why he blocked me on my main facebook page. He blocked me again without saying a word.

Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. Tough it out and things will get better.

You're a mod..  change the title.. I have been in this position as a teacher and the first thing we learn how to handle this is listen to the person and their problems.. Never hang up the phone or slam the door into ttheir face..

You, or anyone reading this, may think I'm some crazy "religious" lunatic, but nothing you or anyone else could say would prevent God from loving you. When the creator of everything loves you enough to allow his own Son to die for you, that is love; overwhelming, passionate, all powerful love from God. That is what motivates me constantly. 

Isaiah 40: 30-31

30 "Even youths shall faint and be weary,
    and young men shall fall exhausted;
31 but  they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength;
    they shall mount up with wings like eagles;
they shall run and not be weary;
    they shall walk and not faint."

----------------------

The more I trust in God and serve HIM, the less stress I feel and the more joy I have. I love you, I'm sure other's love you that you don't even realize, but even if they don't you can be thankful that God loves you enough to sacrifice Christ for you. I say all this to not start a debate, but to encourage you. God loves you!

If it is possible, why not study abroad. Try getting into college in another country. Here in Belgium it is very good to study, enough courses and opportunities provided in English, you can study an extra language like French and be in a very multicultural environment like in Brussels. And it is quite affordable comparing to other countries.

And nomather where you are planning to study. Join the organization AIESEC. It has really improved my life in an unforgettable way by really getting professional experience, work in a nice team, discover yourself, gain leadership experiences and have a small impact on your surroundings or even the world. I joined last year after a friend approached me, I felt miserable as well and thought just to give it a chance and see how it is. I did a project with Microsoft which was nice, but next to that I got to learn my best friends, some considered my family now and we did a lot together. Now I'm a Vice President HR at the AIESEC of my university. I'm really a changed guy now.

If you want more information you can look on their website or just send me a PM.

Never give up. Try to find comfort and happiness in the things you enjoy and do go to college if that is a possibilty. It's very good to be around people when you're down. Toughen up, I know that is hard though.
A lot of people have felt similar for other reasons. Hang in there and try not to distance yourself from living.
Things will turn around for the good if you keep on trying.

About your cousin, try to give it a place and move on, some people are just assholes and some can't find the time to comfort another because of their own problems, who knows what his reasons were. Try to move on.

(it's easy talking not being in your situation, no offense, just hope all these comments can help you out a bit)