As I reflected upon my life, I began to think about the impact that my family has placed on my life. I particularly began to think about how my life could be more satisfying if I had a different set of people raise me. After a while, I started to yearn for a life where some of my family were of a different character, almost entirely different people by some people definitions. After realizing these feelings, I started to wonder if I was abnormal. So, I decided to go and ask my closest friends if they shared the same feelings as I. So...do you?
And by change, that could be anything. Physical changes, mental changes, emotional changes, religious changes, financial changes, etc. (Though I'm personally interested in mental and emotional changes). And by family members, I mean any family member. Brother, sister, mom, dad, aunt, uncle, etc.
If I was given the oppurtunity to drastically change my family members, I'd take advantage of it without hesitation. I would change probably every member in my family to be more open-minded, more considerate, and less judgemental (I won't give any examples for privacy purposes). My family members are the epitome of narrow-mindedness. They religiously follow societal norm without question all while ridiculing any who don't (i.e: me). It sometimes seems like they don't even have the intellectual capacity to make decisions and simply react based on what society deems appropriate. I fucking hate it man! Sometimes, I feel like killing someone just to make them question my actions and maybe have a complex thought. (okay maybe not killing someone, but something to get them to think for themselves)
I've tried opening them up to accepting new ideas, but every time I try, I'm either ignored or laughed at (sometimes both) and I'm always met with a "you're weird" look. Sometimes, I'm even met with hostility if the topic is sensitive enough. One time, I TOYED with the idea of there not being a god and I thought my family hated me (You would have too if you saw their reactions). Even with all this, I still occasionally try introducing them to new ideas, even though I know I'll be ridiculed. Most of the time though, I decide to stay quiet around my family since I know they won't consider anything I say; they already have subconcsious, pre-set reactions to whatever comes out of my mouth. Seriously, their like fucking robots or zombies (or robot zombies) instead of humans. It's gotten to the point where I can predict their reactions to nealy most external stimuli. I sometimes wish I could just trade in my family members for completely different people.
To be fair though, my family is no more narrow-minded than the average person. In fact, they may be better than average. It's just that it becomes a bit depressing when you know you can't express your deep feelings with the people you see most. There average person is no better though, but that's more reason for me to have someone in my family to talk to considering most of humanity can't process a new idea.
With all this in mind, I always wonder how I shaped into the person I am today. It really baffles my mind how I am so different from the rest of my family. I don't know, the development of my personality probably dates back to when I was very young, before my memory can go. They did a very good job raising me though. I'm an excellent person, in my opinion obviously. I just wish they weren't so discouraging to open expression and new ideas. That's why I wish they were different. Not just small traits, I wish I could change the core of their character. Oh well, I guess you gotta live with what you got.
But then again, who am I to say whether I'm any better than my family? No one, I guess. Just giving my feelings.
What about you, VGChartz? If you could (drastically) change the people in your family, would you? I know I would.
SW-
