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Stretching your point a bit with most of those examples, but in essence I don't disagree with you (your 'parody' point, not the reason you made this thread).

I don't think there is a third party conspiracy to make the Vita fail, and I think Ubisoft, Activision, Konami have sound business reasons for not continuing their franchises on the Vita so I just can't be angry at them - I don't expect third parties to support platforms by default, that's not how being a third party works.