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Oh boy where do i begin?

Racist bigot = no
'big boned' = yes
like to talk shit to friends = yes
cryogenically frozen for wii launch = yes
thinks others should respect mah authoritah = yes
will roshambo you for it = yes, i go first
mom is a crack whore = no, but my mother in law is
wants to be a pirate = yes
won't share chicken pot pie with pet = yes
had an alien anal probe = not that i know of

screw you guys i'm going home > >