I might not ever even get a girlfriend because everything about me is shit and you're upset about this?

Don't worry bro, you'll find the one.

I still think that was a bit far man. I mean how the hell can someone be blamed for something that is not under their control?

Where is the "More time for gaming" option in your poll? There is good and bad in everything. Focus on the good.

sounds like the ending of HIMYM except for the part of barney getting a baby and the age difference.

Sounds like a good choice, considering the situation, and sounds like a great way to end it.

The primary function of a male is probably more along the lines of impregnating female(s) to have as many children as possible. Providing for them is probably more of a social construct, but biologically it could fall on either parent. This biological truth here is also probably why this isn't usually looked at from a biological point of view: it's not very well accepted socially. Going around having sex and impregnating a lot of females will get you a certain reputation, and it will get the females a certain reputation as well.

I'm not saying your point of view is wrong, but it's definitely not that widely accepted.

I think your girlfriend understood where i'm coming from.

Men usually lash out at their gf/wives if they lose their job and can't earn because they feel unmanly.

And your gf was lashing out at you by picking on thongs that didn't bother her before she started feeling like less of a woman due to her inability to bear children.

I'm probably too young to give advice, but eh. You should focus on always being happy. If being with her didn't make you happy, you probably made the right choice.

And hey, living the "barney life" got you with her in the first place. What's different now that won't let it happen again?

There are two different reproduction strategies one is R selected where one has as many children as possible and hope some of them survive (such as rabbits), and the other is K where one has a small amount of children and invests in them for a longer time to make sure they succeed (such as an elephant). 

Human babies need the most time to develop and be able to take care of themselves so a K selected strategy is best suited for them, which why a human who decides to adopt the R selected strategy is looked down upon as they leave unproductive members of society in their wake (I.e. women and children on welfare).