Nintendo Wii set to kill us all
It's been confirmed this morning that the Nintendo Wii could be on the brink of trying to end all electronic and human life forms, Nintendo has decided to send the "Mario loves you" virus to each and every Wii world wide, this virus is known to make your Wii come to life (even when not plugged in to a power outlet) and start shouting "I love mario", "I love mario", "you will love mario too if it is the last thing you do" "Wa ha ha ha",
The next stage of the virus is very disturbing and is being taken very seriously by all security firms across the world, The wii hops around your home looking for any "competitor" systems (excluding retro nintendo systems) and when any are spotted it will start jumping up and down on them until they break, the wii will also seek and destroy any phone lines in your home to stop you calling for help whilst also sealing all your doors with special "super mushroom" sticky stuff,
The wii then tries to brainwash it's owners by tying them up with "super ninja" rope and reading out over and over again the list of wii games currently out for sale along with all future release dates, this can go on for years at a time with no known cure,
Everybody is being advised to take extra precautions when going near their Nintendo Wii until a fix can be found, you are also advised to wear sunglasses when you play the wii to stop the "Zelda la la" rays being absorbed via your eyes,
Thanks for reading and remember, be safe!
