"On to No More Heroes, huh? Now there's a mixed bag.
"So, the Wii is still outselling everything else in the industry. I think I read a statistic that in the month of November 2.04 million Wiis were sold world-wide, whereas something like 800,000 PS3s made it off the shelves. The Wii has already won, apparently.
"But on my list of the best games of the last year, there . . . is one Wii game. It's a fun one, mind you. One of the best game experiences I had this year. No More Heroes is a smug celebration of gamey-things, on a console that seems determined to avoid becoming a game system. It's like the kid who asks to enroll in English boarding school because it's that much more abrasive when he shows off his tattoos.
"We all know it, we all keep saying it: The Wii is not made for video-games. It's a low-def CRT board-game machine. It's an exercise accessory. It's a novelty item. Yeah, it's got de Blob, but you have to play Party Babyz to completion before the Wii will allow you to load any platforming titles.
"Man, I'm actually angry at the Wii. That's not good journalism. Maybe it's good journalism to admit it.
"Maybe this isn't journalism.
"I really hope that we finally get some actual games on the thing this year. How many months does it take for third-party developers to catch up to the staggering success of the little white weirdo? Was the release cycle of the original Nintendo Entertainment System anything like this? After Super Mario Bros came out, was there a three year period of mini-games and crossword puzzle simulators? Was everyone embarrased when they went to Toys 'R Us to look for NES games?
"I'm not the only one distressed by the Wii. As of February, the average Wii game score was a dismal 64%. In this industry, it translates to terrible. Though I don't subscribe to the idea of game ratings, I still have to say that's a lot of thumbs down righ there. The Wii is a system of great singular achievements drowning among miserable failures. For every No More Heroes, there's fifteen hundred Game Party 2's.
"In the next year, there is only one Wii game that I'm really looking forward to -- Platinum Games' Mad World.
"Problem is, there will be hundreds, if not thousands, of other terrible Wii titles released. What's worse, in our desperation to justify our purchases of the Wii, we might buy a few of them. Hell, at one point, I was holding WiiFit in my hands at Circuit City, staring into the abyss. As I considered picking up a copy, I suddenly felt my mind slipping out the back of my head, like an uncooked egg.
"Man, that system is depressing. I would rather that console feature a limited library of near misses, than that it choked on the easy money of mini-games. I would rather squint my eyes in a world of gray titles than peer through the clear broth of Bratz Kids.
"Why are the riskiest titles coming out on the systems with so much more to lose? Shouldn't the console with the install base of everyone-and-their-grandmother be witnessing a Rennaissance of experimental titles?
"I mean, remember the PS2? Remember God Hand? That might be the grayest game ever made. Just look at the scores. There are so many black and white opinions of that game that the average looks something like San Francisco in the spring."
--Heather Campbell from her article "No Yes, and No No: Games in Shades of Gray" in Play Magazine's 2008 Year in Review Issue. February 2009 volume eight issue two. Afro Samurai Cover pg. 57.
Discussion?
Heavens to Murgatoids.
Oh noes. I said it. 
